The Year of Secrets
by Tosca1390
Summary: As Harry and Ginny begin their new relationship and struggle to hide it from the world, secrets that have haunted their lives start to unfurl and reveal themselves. Based on my fic Exposure. complete
1. One

The Year of Secrets: Chapter One  
  
A/N: If you haven't read my fic "Exposure", you will not understand this story. It is the prologue of sorts to "The Year of Secrets", and before you continue with this, you must read "Exposure." Enjoy! ^_^  
  
Ginny settled into a chair by the window as the Hogwarts Express tooted and puffed, starting with a jerk from the platform as rain sprinkled lightly from the sky. Her brother Ron was sitting in front of her, an arm draped across his girlfriend Hermione's shoulders, and they were conversing with Harry, who was sitting next to her. It was September 1st, and they were all on their way back to Hogwarts' School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for another year, the last one still weighing heavily on their minds.  
  
The last weeks of summer had been peaceful enough for the Burrow, Hermione and Ron having finally admitted to one another that there was more than friendship to their feelings. Harry had left them alone for the most part, amusing himself with flying, the twins' gags, and, most importantly, Ginny.  
  
Ginny felt a light blush on her cheeks, and she smiled to herself. By now, she and Harry were fairly familiar with the 'path of sin' she had suggested leading him down in Flourish and Botts, and were successful in keeping it a complete secret from her nosy brothers. It was more than the fear of humiliation that kept them from informing her family and Hermione; Harry had adamantly told her that as long as no one knew of her relationship to him, she couldn't be used against him by anyone. She had just nodded, and let him control that area of their relationship. Because of his own guilt over Sirius' death, she didn't want to push him too far yet.  
  
They had told her parents, though; she had wanted to, even through his vague arguments. The night before they had to go to Hogwarts, the two of them had found her parents alone, and informed them of their new relationship. Mrs. Weasley had cried happily and Mr. Weasley had just smiled, both promising not to tell anyone on the premise that Harry and Ginny didn't want her brothers to know.  
  
It had been a very good holiday on the whole. Ginny hadn't really wanted to go back to Hogwarts, worrying if the little world she and Harry had created at the Burrow would fall apart, if he would realize how little she deserved him, and try to break from her. She never voiced that fear to him, because she knew it was a silly one. Harry wasn't the type to have little flings and throw the girl away the next day; it just wasn't in him. Still, she worried just the same.  
  
"Ginny? Are you all right?"  
  
She turned her head to meet Hermione's concerned eyes. Ron was rolling his eyes at her, and Harry had a small grin on his face, his gaze speaking volumes to her. She smiled, and raised an eyebrow at Hermione. "Sure! Why? Do I look ill?" she asked.  
  
The concern faded, and Hermione settled back in her seat, swaying with the movement of the train. "No, not at all. You just seemed out of it for a moment."  
  
"Probably reliving the closet incident," Harry teased lightly, earning a whack from Hermione, a flush from Ron, and a giggle from Ginny.  
  
"Right in one, Potter. That was the best day of my whole summer," Ginny proclaimed, watching the couple across from her sink into their seats, growing as red as the cushions. She laughed at their faces, seeing Ron filling with mock-outrage.  
  
"In more ways than that one, I hope," she heard Harry mutter for her ears alone as Ron started rattling on about the dirty trick they played on him and Hermione, and she shot him a smirk.  
  
"Keep hoping," she whispered lightly, making him grin, and turned back to Ron. "Ron, if Harry and I hadn't shoved you in that closet, you two would still be tip-toeing around each other, and too thick to realize it," she retorted to her brother, brushing crimson curls from her face.  
  
Ron scowled at her as Harry choked back a bout of laughter. "Right, right. Laugh it up. How about a game of chess, Ginny? I'll show you a trick or two."  
  
She shook her head, giggling. "I don't think so. I'm going to go find Neville and Luna, and say hello," she said, slanting a meaningful gaze at the dark-haired boy next to her. "I'll be back in a bit."  
  
Ron grimaced at her, and turned to speak to Hermione. Ginny grinned, and walked out of the compartment, going into the connecting hall between theirs and the next one, steadying herself as the train puffed along. After passing through Neville's compartment for a quick hello, she went into another connecting hall, and stopped, leaning against the wall. She closed her eyes, and waited.  
  
It wasn't long until she heard the door slide open on one side, and shut just as quietly. Her heart sped up as footsteps neared her, and an arm wrapped around her waist gently. Warmth blossomed in her, and she opened her eyes to look up into Harry's soft gaze. A grin spread on her face, and she leaned her cheek against his shoulder. "Hi."  
  
He smiled down at the top of her head. "Hey, Ginny. How are you doing?"  
  
She groaned softly. "What are we going to do at school, Harry? I don't know if I can bear it," she said mournfully, looking up at him.  
  
"You've got to bear it, Ginny. I can't let you get hurt." He gave her a lopsided grin. "If it makes you feel better, I don't know how I'll bear it either."  
  
"It doesn't," she grumbled, eliciting a chuckle from him that she could feel vibrating in his chest. She pouted. "I don't see why you're laughing. This won't be fun."  
  
"It will be fun, Ginny. Haven't you thought of any other paths of sin to lead me down?" he teased softly, brushing his lips across her forehead.  
  
She reached her face up to his, and their mouths met briefly, drinking in the other as quickly as possible. The train went round a sharp curve, and they fell against the wall, him crushing her with his weight. She sighed, wrapping her arms around his neck as his mouth moved over hers gently. There wasn't anything better than having Harry in her arms; Merlin only knew how she would deal with not being able to have him publicly. She didn't want to hide this from the world, but she knew it was for the best.  
  
He broke away from her reluctantly, leaning his head in the crook of her neck, and sighing. "Bloody hell, Ginny," he breathed. "Maybe this won't be so fun."  
  
She smiled wistfully, playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck. "No, you're right, Harry. It will be fine. I promise," she murmured, kissing his cheek.  
  
There were the sounds of footsteps near the door to Neville's compartment, and the couple broke apart quickly, smoothing their mussed robes. Ginny grinned slightly at Harry. "This will work well," she mouthed, making him shrug, a smile playing at his lips. She reached out to touch his arm, and eased the door open, waving at Neville and Luna as she passed through their compartment. As she slid the door to her own open, she heard Hermione give a muffled gasp, and out of the corner of her downcast eyes she saw Ron and Hermione break away from each other much in the same fashion as she and Harry just had. She suppressed the growing grin on her face.  
  
"Hello," she greeted cheerfully, watching with amusement as both their faces began to flush. "Neville says hi."  
  
Hermione furtively smoothed her robes, and looked at Ginny as she sat down opposite them. "Oh, good. I'm glad he's all right."  
  
Ginny schooled her features to innocence. "Where's Harry?"  
  
Ron looked around the compartment with interest. "He was here just a second ago," he said, confusion over his face.  
  
Just then, the door slid open, and Harry stepped in, looking cool and collected as he made his way to his seat. "Needed to step out for some air," he commented, plopping down next to Ginny. "It was getting a bit warm in here," he added, grinning at his two best friends.  
  
Ron frowned as Hermione let out a squeal of embarrassment. "Shove it, Potter. Now, how about that chess?"  
  
~*~  
  
Harry was very relieved to be back at Hogwarts. He realized it as he walked into the Great Hall that night for the Welcoming Feast, flanked on both sides by Ron, Hermione, and Ginny. No matter who stared and whispered as he passed by, he already felt at home and safe inside the castle walls. He even welcomed the usual sneer from Snape as they passed the staff table; some things were always constant. He needed things to be constant right now.  
  
They settled at their usual seats, and Harry looked across from his seat to see Ginny grinning at him, dark eyes reassuring and insinuating at the same instant. He swallowed, and grinned back. How would he bear this? He felt like he needed to pull her across the table and kiss the breath out of her.  
  
Once that thought was visualized, he almost moaned. This would be a frustrating year.  
  
The Sorting Hat began its song, but Harry didn't notice it. He felt a small foot nudging his ankle, and a shot of warmth traveled up his leg straight to his head. He shot a warning glance at Ginny, and she smirked. The foot edged up under the hems of his robe, rubbing at his skin.  
  
A very frustrating year, indeed.  
  
Finally, the Sorting Hat finished its song, and Harry joined in the applause weakly, wondering if the song had really been that good. He hadn't heard one word.  
  
Professor McGonagall took out her scroll of first-years from the pocket of her robes, and began calling out names. Ron groaned under his breath, and leaned over to Harry. "This is murder. I'm so hungry," he groused, earning a poke in the side from Hermione.  
  
Harry silently agreed as Ginny's foot nudged a bit higher up his calf. This was absolute murder.  
  
After an eternity, the final child, Emma Yeager, was proclaimed a Ravenclaw, and the Sorting Hat was taken away by McGonagall, headed for Dumbledore's office to wait until next year. In the middle of the impatient chatter, Professor Dumbledore stood from his seat at the staff table, and raised his hand for silence. It was given almost immediately, and he smiled amicably at the students before him.  
  
"And so we begin a new year. I would like to remind all of you that the Forbidden Forest is, well, forbidden to all students. Mr. Filch has added another twenty-five items to the list of unacceptable items, so, if you need to, check the list to make sure you aren't carrying any. Hogsmeade is off-limits to anyone under third year."  
  
He paused, eyes twinkling gently as he gazed across the room. His eyes met Harry's, and a soft smile creased his face. "I also would like to welcome back Remus Lupin as the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher," he added, motioning towards the end of the staff table.  
  
Harry's eyes widened as he saw his father's close friend wave at the students cheerfully, smiling tiredly at Harry when he met his gaze. Lupin looked weary, but stronger since the last time Harry had seen him at King's Cross in June. He wondered why no one had told him Lupin was coming back, but let that thought go as wild applause echoed in the hall from every table except the Slytherins'. Harry let a nasty smirk cross his face when he glimpsed Draco Malfoy looking fairly uncomfortable at his seat.  
  
Dumbledore waited for the applause to die down before resuming his speech. "That's all from me. Tuck in!"  
  
Ron let out one of many whoops for joy as food appeared on the tables, and students dug in hungrily. Harry watched as Dumbledore leaned over to speak to McGonagall, and then turned his gaze away, reaching for the potatoes. Ginny's foot halted its ministrations abruptly, and he looked up at her. She was gazing at him in concern, eyebrow raised. He smiled slightly at her, and after a moment, she smiled back, and started to eat.  
  
Beside him, Ron let out a sigh of satisfaction. "The food here is bloody wonderful," he mumbled through his roast beef.  
  
Hermione frowned in a way that reminded Harry very much of their Head of House. "Watch your language, Ron. You're a prefect," she admonished her boyfriend. He just shrugged at her, smiling as she huffed.  
  
Harry grinned. Some things never change.  
  
"Mr. Potter, the headmaster would like to see you in his office after the feast this evening."  
  
Harry looked up at Professor McGonagall quickly from his seat at the table, a light frown creasing his lips. "Why?"  
  
His Head of House pursed her lips, and shifted her stance at his side. "I am not privy to that information, Potter. Just make you way to his office once the feast is over. Is that clear?"  
  
Harry nodded, and she swept off towards the staff table, black robes billowing behind her. He frowned, and turned back to his food, trying to ignore the curious stares coming from Hermione and Ron. He hadn't even been here one night, and Dumbledore already wanted to see him. Given his behavior in his office those dreadful hours after Sirius' death, he would have thought the headmaster would want to keep him at a distance.  
  
His stomach clenched, and he set his fork down abruptly. He didn't want to think of his behavior towards Dumbledore. He might have been overwhelmed with grief, but that was no excuse for his actions and words. In his solitary hours over the summer, Harry had realized this many times over, and each time made him feel even worse than before.  
  
"Harry? What did McGonagall want?"  
  
He turned his face to Ron and shrugged. "Just have to go talk to Dumbledore for a minute after the feast. Nothing important," he replied with forced cheer, and picked up his fork once more.  
  
Ron eyed him for a moment, then turned to his sister, who was sitting opposite Harry. "Who do you think will be the Quidditch captain this year?" he asked through a mouthful of potato.  
  
Ginny wrinkled her nose at him. "Ron, that's disgusting," she scolded as Hermione smacked him on the arm. "I don't know, in answer to your question. Angelina and Alicia are both gone. You and Harry are the oldest ones on the team," she said thoughtfully, glancing at Harry.  
  
He raised an eyebrow. "I was suspended, remember?"  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Umbridge isn't here anymore, Harry. Dumbledore will lift your suspension by the week's end."  
  
He smiled. "And, anyway, I'm not Captain material. I know nothing about strategy. I can't even win a chess game!"  
  
Ron snickered. "Very true, mate."  
  
Harry elbowed Ron, smirking. Hermione rolled her eyes, muttered something about boys being idiots, and went back to her meal. Ginny giggled, and leaned over to speak to Colin, who was sitting one seat down from her. Harry watched her mouth move for a bit, forgetting the cooling food on his plate, his focus completely on the girl laughing across from him.  
  
He felt a knot tighten in his chest. She had no idea the secrets he had. Would she still want him if she knew what he had to do? What he had to be? She knew so little of his connection with Voldemort; she didn't fully understand how close he was at all times. That's why the secret of their relationship was so important; if Voldemort knew how close she was to him, she would be used against him. Did she want him anyway, regardless of the danger?  
  
Why did she want him in the first place?  
  
He understood his own feelings. In the time after Sirius' death, she was the only one who understood the space he needed, and she gave it to him. She was the only one who could make him laugh, make him feel anything other then the grief and guilt that had overwhelmed him. She was the only one who had seen past all his barriers, and still accepted him as a person.  
  
Why?  
  
He looked down at his food, suddenly not very hungry. His life was full of whys. And, some of them had nothing to do with Voldemort.  
  
The feast went on for a bit longer, and Harry was almost sick as it winded down and the time to see Dumbledore drew near. Hermione was the first one up as the dishes were cleared away, dragging Ron with her as she set about leading the Gryffindors to the towers, guiding the awed first- years about. Harry hung back, taking his time to exit the Great Hall. When he did, he found Ginny tapping her foot outside the doors, waiting patiently for him. He stopped about two feet in front of her, and watched her eyebrows rise.  
  
"Aren't you coming, Harry?" she asked cheerfully, scanning his face curiously.  
  
He shook his head. "I have to meet with Dumbledore. It'll only take a few minutes," he replied quietly.  
  
She nodded, and there was silence between them as the Hall emptied. When they were alone, she stepped up to him, and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll wait for you outside his office, all right?" she murmured.  
  
He smiled down at her, and nodded. "Ok."  
  
She grinned, and pushed him in the direction of Dumbledore's office. "Go on, then. Can't keep a girl waiting too long," she teased lightly, turning on her heel, and walking after the Gryffindor students.  
  
Harry watched her leave, and started out slowly for the headmaster's office, feet dragging in apprehension. He didn't want to keep Dumbledore waiting, but he didn't want to see the man just yet. Memories of that night flooded over him as he traced the familiar path, and he shut his eyes, leaning against the wall for a moment. He didn't want to think about it. It was all so raw and painful for him right now. Impulsively, he wished that Ginny was with him. She could always make him forget...  
  
"Mr. Potter! Potter!"  
  
His eyes shot open, and he straightened, seeing Professor McGonagall standing at the gargoyle that led to Dumbledore's office. She looked impatiently at him, and raised an eyebrow. "Come along, Potter. The headmaster is a very busy man," she called.  
  
Harry walked quickly to her, and waited as she gave the password (Cauldron Cake), and the statue sprang to life, revealing the stairway up to the office door. McGonagall watched him silently for a moment, and when he still didn't move, prodded him gently with her walking stick.  
  
"Potter, go on. Don't waste any time," she said, poking him again.  
  
He swallowed, and started up the stairway, heart pounding painfully in his chest. The door was open a crack, and a thin beam of light slipped onto his feet as he stopped on the last step. He thought about turning around and running, but the quiet, tired voice from inside the room stopped him.  
  
"Please come in, Harry."  
  
There was nothing to be done. Harry pushed the door open, and walked in, feeling the eyes of all the portraits boring into him.  
  
"It looks like he's grown a bit since June," one woman commented.  
  
"The pillager is back, I see. Is he going to have another go at the office, Dumbledore?" queried another tartly.  
  
Harry kept his eyes on the floor, feeling the shame sweep over him. He heard Dumbledore sigh, and speak to the murmuring portraits: "Harry is always welcome to break any of my things as he likes. But, do not speak of something you may not understand. Do sit down Harry."  
  
The pictures fell silent, and Harry looked up. Albus Dumbledore sat behind his cluttered desk serenely, fingering his snow-white beard, and watching Harry with his clear blue gaze. Harry exhaled, and sat down, not able to meet the other man's eyes.  
  
Dumbledore smiled gently at him. "I wanted to inquire after your holiday, Harry. Did the Dursleys treat you well?"  
  
Harry grimaced. "I left them after about a month, sir. They treated me with silence. I didn't really do much for them," he replied quietly.  
  
"And, how was the Burrow? I'm sure the Weasleys treated you well?"  
  
Harry held back a blush, thinking immediately of Ginny. "I had a good time with them, sir. They were very kind to me."  
  
Dumbledore smiled genially. "I have had a letter from the Weasleys just this morning, Harry. They tell me that you and Miss Weasley are...attached?"  
  
At this, Harry's head shot up to meet the knowing eyes of the headmaster. His heart did a jig against his ribs, and he swallowed hard. "Professor, I...well..." He fumbled for words. "Ginny and I..."  
  
The corners of Dumbledore's mouth crinkled, and he cut Harry off gently. "It is a secret that will be hard to keep, Harry. I understand your use of caution; it is very wise. I will tell no one, do not worry. Miss Weasley's parents just thought it would be wise for me to know."  
  
Harry nodded dumbly, not knowing what to say to that. Inwardly, he heaved a sigh of relief. As long as Dumbledore knew, Ginny would be safe, no matter what.  
  
The older man continued. "In light of this new development, I would like to continue your Occlumency lessons." At the grimace on Harry's face, he chuckled. "There is no need to take them with Professor Snape. I am confident that I can teach you just as well. As long as you have no problems with the arrangement..."  
  
Harry shook his head. "None at all, sir. Thank you," he said sincerely, causing the portraits to murmur in approval.  
  
Dumbledore leaned toward him. "Harry, I hope that you harbor no ill will towards me for my secrecy over the last five years. As I have explained, I felt that every time was ill to tell you about the connections you have with Voldemort."  
  
Harry gulped. "No sir. In fact, I did want to apologize for ripping your office apart that morning."  
  
Dumbledore smiled. "Think nothing of it, Harry. It's just an office. I can always get new furniture if necessary." He sighed thoughtfully, and stood. "Now, I believe you should be getting back to the common room. In the morning, I will tell you the schedule for the Occlumency lessons."  
  
Harry stood as well. "Thank you, Professor."  
  
"No trouble, Harry. Go on. I believe Miss Weasley is waiting patiently for you outside my office," Dumbledore replied, a bright sparkle in his eye.  
  
Harry turned a light red as he bid the headmaster good night and left the office, wondering how Dumbledore always seemed to know things like that. He had no sooner come out from the gargoyle's shadow when he saw Ginny leaning against the stone wall across from the statue, eyes bright with anticipation. A warm sensation spilled from the pit of his stomach when he saw her, and he glimpsed around quickly to ensure solitude before going up to her.  
  
She looked up at him curiously. "Are you all right, Harry? I think we're alone," she added, a light blush suffusing her cheeks.  
  
He looked down at her for a moment, watching the lights dance through her crimson hair, the emotions fly through her dark gaze, and again could only wonder why she wanted him. Abruptly, he realized that she was fidgeting nervously. His silence must have been longer than he thought. "We are. I was just thinking," he replied indistinctly.  
  
She smiled slyly. "First time for everything," she teased.  
  
He grinned, and wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. "You won't get away with that one, you know."  
  
"I'd like to see you try and retaliate," she challenged, looking up at him from beneath smoky lashes.  
  
He was just about to lower his mouth to hers when there were footsteps from around the corner, and the sound of a grumpy cat's purring. They jumped apart quickly, flattening to either side of the hall.  
  
"Are there little beasties around the headmaster's office, darling? Where are they?" Filch asked his cat.  
  
"Damn," Ginny muttered, and, grabbing Harry's hand, raced down the hall. "I hate that man."  
  
"I hate him a lot more right now then I did five minutes ago," Harry said sourly.  
  
Ginny giggled, and squeezed his hand. "You're not in trouble with Dumbledore, are you? You were in there a while," she commented as they headed towards the stairs to Gryffindor Tower.  
  
Harry shook his head. "No. He just needed to talk to me," he said vaguely.  
  
Panting from their sprint, they headed up the stairs slowly, hand loosely intertwined. Breathing deeply, Harry watched her brush hair from her eyes, smiling brightly at him. His heart sped up, and suddenly he stopped. She halted a bit in front of him, and looked back. "Harry? What is it?"  
  
He pulled her against him, and buried his face in her curls, inhaling her scent quickly. She curled up to him, wrapping her arms around him, and sighing. "This is impossible," she mumbled into his robes.  
  
"It can't be impossible. I hear the Room of Requirement is available a lot," he said lightly, kissing the top of her head.  
  
She lifted her head, rolling her eyes at him. "You're terrible," she mock- scolded.  
  
He grinned. "I know. You go in first, all right?"  
  
She sighed, and kissed him on the cheek quickly. "All right. See you in there." She released him, and climbed up the last bit to the portrait hole.  
  
The Fat Lady looked her over appraisingly, and clucked. "You're mussed, dear. Who are you with now?"  
  
Ginny smiled. "No one. Toad's Foot," she said, and climbed inside when the portrait swung open.  
  
Harry stood on the steps for a bit, looking at the spot where Ginny had last stood. Secrets everywhere. Would she still want him when the secrets were revealed?  
  
~*~  
  
"I must find out what Potter is up to, Draco."  
  
"I understand, Master."  
  
"Set to it. Give me anything. The boy must have a weakness. You must find it for me."  
  
"It is done, My Lord."  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Harry Potter is not mine. Please read and review. ^_^ 


	2. Two

A/N: For the purposes of my sanity, let's say that each class period is 90 minutes long, or an hour and a half. Class starts at nine in the morning, a lunch break from noon to one, and ends at four. Everyday there will be one double period of a certain class. If the double period is in the morning, the second morning class is moved up to the afternoon, and class ends later. If I have screwed up the Hogwarts system in anyway, please let me know. ^_^  
  
When she looked at her timetable the next morning, Ginny wasn't terribly stressed. Of course, the thought of another year of Potions with the Slytherins was as revolting as ever, but on the whole she was happy with her schedule. Looking across the table, she could tell that her brother wasn't quite as happy with the piece of parchment in his hands, but he was a very negative person in matters of school anyway. Hermione was glowing with the excitement of her classes, and Harry was calmly looking at Ron's timetable, taking it all in stride.  
  
Ginny watched him from the corner of her eye for a moment, feeling a weight drop onto her heart. "He's always had to take things in stride," she thought. "Never has he had time to dwell, except for the summers."  
  
"Bloody hell. I hate Potions," Ron snarled, grabbing a few pieces of toast from the plate in front of him.  
  
"Ron, stop it! Honestly! We have to take it. There's no other way around it," Hermione reminded him, sipping from her pumpkin juice slowly.  
  
Ron turned pleading eyes on his girlfriend. "Can't you have sympathy for me for one morning?"  
  
Hermione swatted his hand as it reached out to her arm. "Not when you whinge like a baby," she scolded mildly.  
  
"I thought that was what you liked about me," Ron replied cheekily, dodging her hand and kissing her cheek quickly. Hermione turned a light shade of pink, and went back to her breakfast.  
  
Ginny smothered a giggle, looking at Harry, whose gaze was at the timetable in his hands. His features darkened, and she frowned lightly. He was displeased...and she couldn't even ask him why. Not here. She sighed, and pushed away her plate. This secrecy business was going to be the end of her.  
  
Her gaze went to the staff table, and she watched as Dumbledore conversed cheerfully with Professor Flitwick. Last night, Harry hadn't said a thing about his meeting with Dumbledore to her, and from what she could tell, Ron and Hermione didn't know anything either. That comforted her and unnerved her at the same time. Harry wasn't telling them anything she didn't know, but he wasn't saying anything to his two best friends. She didn't know if that was a good sign or not.  
  
Dumbledore's eyes left the tiny Charms professor's, and he locked gazes with Ginny. A knowing smile creased his face, and she thought she saw him wink at her before going back to Flitwick. She blinked, and shook her head. It was like he knew something about her...  
  
"Ginny! Ginny!"  
  
Her head turned sharply to Hermione's curious eyes. "Yes?"  
  
The older girl eyed her suspiciously for a moment, but smiled at her. "Do you have Defense Against the Dark Arts four times a week like us?"  
  
Ginny glanced down at her timetable. "Yes, I do."  
  
"I suppose Dumbledore wanted to make up for last year's lack of practice. I didn't learn a thing in Umbridge's class," Hermione murmured, and looked across Ron to Harry, who was unnaturally quiet. "What do you think, Harry?"  
  
Ginny observed shrewdly as Harry jumped slightly in his seat, startled by Hermione's question. "What was that?" he asked, blinking rapidly.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Honestly! Why are you so out of it this morning?"  
  
Harry shrugged. "Just tired, I guess."  
  
Ginny frowned, and stood up, gathering up her schoolbag. "I'm off," she said breezily, causing the Trio to look up at her. "See you all at lunch." She walked off, trying to ignore the emerald stare boring into her back. Tossing her hair from her face, she looked down at her schedule to look at her first class of the day, putting Harry from her mind. If he wanted to keep secrets, that was fine by her. She just didn't take very keenly to being in the dark. If he didn't trust her, who did he trust?  
  
~*~  
  
When Harry walked into the Potions dungeon for his first class of the new year, he felt a dark, boiling hate surge into his veins as he saw Snape's back at the front of the room. Even though the logical side of his brain told him he was being ridiculous to an extent, he tossed that aside for the blinding, primal side of him that hated everything the Potions Master touched, breathed on, walked past. He'd left the Pensive out. He'd thrown Harry out of his office. He'd stopped the Occlumency lessons. He'd left Harry vulnerable to Voldemort's whims.  
  
Harry took a deep breath, shoving the flood of negativity down to fester in his deepest walls, and exhaled, finding his usual seat beside Ron. The rest of the class trailed inside in clumps, the Slytherins staring and whispering as they passed his table. He ignored them, listening inattentively to Ron and Hermione converse. What Malfoy said couldn't hurt him now. He was numb to everything except the animosity he harbored towards the greasy-haired man at the front of the room.  
  
Snape turned around, and his trademark sneer twisted his lips. "Everyone here? Good." He looked down at a paper on his desk. "We'll be starting the year with the learning of various Healing potions. The knowledge of them might become useful to you in the near future. I have written the recipe for a Nerve-Repair Potion on the board. Can someone tell me what it can be used for?"  
  
Hermione's hand shot up immediately, as usual. As usual, Snape ignored her, and let his gaze drift over the Gryffindor tables. "Mr. Longbottom," he called.  
  
Harry watched as Neville looked up at Snape, pale in the face. "Yes, sir?"  
  
"Tell me what this potion can be used for," Snape repeated silkily, making Harry's blood boil in anger. Ron muttered a curse under his breath, and Hermione dropped her hand, looking mournful. They all knew why Snape had asked Neville this question.  
  
In front of them, Neville gulped. "It can be used in...It can be used as..."  
  
The Slytherins tittered, and Snape smirked. "Stop stuttering and answer, Longbottom."  
  
"It's used for cases when a person has been mildly subjected to the Cruciatus Curse," Neville muttered, looking paler than snow.  
  
Harry's stomach gave a funny lurch, and the rush of blinding hate fought to get to the surface of his mind. Neville's parents had been tortured by the Cruciatus Curse when he was just a little boy, and Snape knew it. It only showed the vindictive, evil man that he was, and Harry hated him more for it.  
  
Snape nodded curtly. "Thank you, Longbottom. Nerve-Repair Potions can be used in many situations were a person's nerves have been mildly damaged. An example of this would be the Cruciatus Curse---to a certain extent. Only mild cases of the curse can be helped."  
  
He looked around the class, a frown across his lips. "Follow the recipe on the board, and by the end of the class period I want a vial from each one of you. The color of this potion should be a light blue. Keep that in mind. You may begin."  
  
Harry struggled to keep himself from hexing the man, and cursed him as he got out the necessary ingredients for the potion. "Bloody bastard," he muttered, slamming his cauldron on the table.  
  
Ron nodded vigorously. "You can say that again, mate."  
  
Hermione pursed her lips, but kept silent. She was obviously as mad as the both of them; she was just better at controlling it.  
  
Midway through class, Ron nudged Harry. "So, what did Dumbledore want with you last night?"  
  
"Oh." Harry grunted as he poured ground moonstone into his cauldron. "Just to check up on my summer. Stuff like that."  
  
"It certainly took a while, Harry. Is there anything you want to tell us?" Hermione asked softly, stirring the mixture inside her cauldron slowly.  
  
Harry shook his head, watching with downcast eyes as Snape came near their table, the sneer widening on his face. "Ten points from Gryffindor, Granger. Keep your mouth closed during my class," he snapped, and walked away.  
  
Hermione stiffened, and Ron started swearing angrily under his breath. Harry had to physically stop his hand from reaching for his wand, muscles tensed with anger. The darkness swelled in him again, and he avoided looking at Snape the rest of the class, knowing he wouldn't be able to stop himself from harming the man if he did.  
  
~*~  
  
"Damned bloody prat. Who does he think he is? If only I could hex him..."  
  
Ron was still furious over Snape's behavior toward Hermione by the end of the day. Harry was right with him as they lounged in the common room after dinner. Other than Potions, it had been a good first day back. Charms had come after Potions, and after lunch was Defense Against the Dark Arts and a double class of History of Magic in the afternoon, which meant a doubly long nap for everyone. Harry was relaxing nicely in his favorite chair by the hearth, dreading the next night. Instead of sitting here with his friends, he would be with Dumbledore practicing Occlumency. It wasn't the lesson he dreaded so much; it was the excuse he would have to make up to his friends for being missing every Tuesday night for an hour.  
  
Their first Defense lesson with Lupin had been as enjoyable as they had been in their third year. He was starting with the Patronus Charm in response to the desertion of the Dementors in the summer, and Harry had to demonstrate for the class, which hadn't been hard. Lupin had caught his eye more than once during the period, and Harry had smiled at him weakly. He didn't quite want to talk to Lupin yet, as much as he admired him. He would be reminded too much of Sirius and his parents...and all he wanted to do was to forget it.  
  
Hermione sighed, leaning her head on Ron's shoulder as he ranted. "Ron, please relax. And stop swearing! You're a horrible influence," she hissed, looking around furtively to make sure no impressionable ears were around.  
  
Harry grinned, and closed his eyes, letting his rage simmer below the surface almost forgotten. To think of Snape right now would be blasphemous to the night. He wouldn't think of him now. He wouldn't think of anything now. Except for Ginny...  
  
His eyes snapped open, and he sat up in his chair. Ginny wasn't in the common room yet. He hadn't seen her since dinner, and that was an hour ago. He didn't want to worry, but he felt a keen pang not knowing where she was.  
  
The portrait hole swung open and Ginny entered, looking flustered, and carrying three books in her arms. The three by the fire waved to her, and she dragged herself over, plopping on the hearthrug, near Harry's chair. "I already have two essays to do, and I've only been here a day," she moaned, lying back on the floor and throwing an arm across her eyes.  
  
Harry, who had been so happy to see her that he had nearly grabbed her in his arms as she passed by, sighed wearily. Fifth year was the year of O.W.L.s, and he knew the stress she was going to be under. He had gotten ten O.W.L.s last year, barely scraping by in Potions, and that had been a struggle. Now, Ginny was much brighter than he was, but it would be a challenge for her anyway.  
  
Hermione sighed sympathetically. "As long as you don't wait for the last minute to do them, I'm sure they'll be fine," she soothed her younger friend.  
  
"Thank Merlin I'm done with O.W.L.s I wouldn't be you for a second, Ginny," Ron said with a sigh of relief.  
  
She lifted her arm, and scowled at him. "Thanks a bloody lot, Ron. That really makes me feel better," she snapped.  
  
Ron shrugged. "Just saying the truth."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Tact, Ron. Someday, I'll teach you tact."  
  
"Even you couldn't teach that thick moron tact," Ginny said waspishly.  
  
"Oi! Don't talk to me like that," Ron exclaimed, sitting up on the sofa.  
  
Ginny rolled her eyes and stood, walking back through the portrait hole with an angry step. Harry gaped as she left, very confused. She hadn't seemed to be in a bad mood at breakfast this morning, and he didn't understand why she was so snappy tonight. It was more than the essays; someone must have done something to her during the day. He frowned.  
  
"Harry, can you believe how she was acting? I don't think I've ever been so insulted by a relative in my life," Ron proclaimed, looking quite put out. Hermione bit her lip, looking torn between taking Ginny's side or Ron's. She sighed inaudibly, and stayed silent against Ron's shoulder, letting him rant.  
  
Harry shrugged. "I'm sure she didn't mean it," he said distantly, longing to go after her and ask her what was wrong.  
  
Ron grumped on, switching between cursing Snape and berating Ginny. Harry tuned him out, feeling fairly concerned after a half-hour passed with no sign of Ginny. He was ready to go look for her, no matter what it looked like to Ron and Hermione, when the portrait hole opened, and Ginny stepped inside, Professor McGonagall right behind. Ginny, who still looked livid, hurried over to Neville and Colin as the common room fell silent with the entrance of their Head of House.  
  
McGonagall swept the room with her eyes until they rested on Ron. She made her way over to the hearth, Ron looking very nervous under her gaze. "Mr. Weasley."  
  
"Yes, Professor?" he said weakly, straightening up. Hermione slid away from him, blushing slightly. Harry looked on with interest.  
  
McGonagall looked at him coolly for a moment, leaning on her walking stick. "I have decided that you would be an adequate choice for Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. I hope you will accept this honor, and not disappoint me," she said briskly.  
  
You could have dropped a pin in the room and heard it. There was complete silence. Ron goggled at the stern woman for a moment, eyes wide with disbelief. Hermione's eyes popped out, and she looked at Harry in bewilderment. Harry had to hold back a grin, wishing for a camera. The look on everyone's faces was priceless.  
  
McGonagall coughed after a moment of deathly quiet, looking impatient. "Mr. Weasley, did you hear me?"  
  
Swallowing, Ron nodded. "Yes, Professor," he whispered hoarsely.  
  
"Do you accept?"  
  
"Yes, Professor," was the raspy answer.  
  
She smiled slightly, and nodded. "Good. I have taken the liberty of reserving the pitch for next Monday for tryouts from six to eight. Do not waste time." She turned on her heel, and walked out, leaving all the students in the room to stare in wonder at Ron, who looked just as shocked.  
  
Harry grinned widely. "Captain Ron Weasley, eh?"  
  
Ron blinked, and looked at Harry in wonder. "I...I was sure it would be you," he stuttered.  
  
Harry shook his head, and smiled wryly. "Like I said last night, mate: I have no strategy. Look what happens when I play chess!"  
  
Dean Thomas made his way over to Ron, and clapped him on the shoulder. "Brilliant, Ron! Congratulations!"  
  
With that, the common room swarmed around Ron, everyone calling out congratulations and well-wishes. Harry smiled distantly and made his way out of the crowd, looking for Ginny. She was headed out the portrait hole once more, and he ran to catch up with her, his absence unnoticed in the surprised haze of everyone's mind.  
  
Ginny went down the steps and headed through the entrance hall, slipping out the doors quietly. Harry followed her, and found her leaning against a wall, frowning deeply. She heard his hesitant steps toward her, and looked in his direction. "Can I help you?" she asked dully, the light autumn breeze lifting her curls from her neck.  
  
He stopped a few feet from her, confusion overwhelming him. The sun was just setting, sending the reds in her hair into a crazy pattern of color, and he unconsciously realized how pretty she looked during a sunset. "Are you all right?"  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Do I look all right, Harry?" she exclaimed in frustration.  
  
"There's no need to yell at me. I can hear just fine," he replied coolly, retreating behind the emotional walls that had protected him for many years.  
  
Her face fell as she saw his eyes close off, and she took a step towards him. "I'm sorry, Harry," she said softly, reaching out to touch his arm. He pulled back instinctively, watching the hurt seep into her eyes, and she frowned. "Don't do that, Harry. I didn't mean to snap at you," she pleaded.  
  
He remained still. She pursed her lips, and in a quick movement grasped his forearms in her hands before he could pull back. Her touch warmed him immediately, and she kept her grip tight. "I'm just stressed, Harry. All the teachers I had today gave me the lecture about how O.W.L.s are 'the key to your future,' and then the essays..." she trailed off, looking up at him. "I'm a little scared, Harry. And, you're keeping things from me, too."  
  
Harry jumped at her last words. "What do you mean, Ginny?" he asked nervously.  
  
She turned her gaze downward. "Your meeting with Dumbledore is one thing. Was it so bad that you can't tell me what he said?"  
  
He was at a loss for words. He didn't want to tell Ginny about the Occlumency lessons, because that would include the revelation that Voldemort could see into his mind, and that would lead to the prophecy, but he didn't want to skirt around the issue of secrecy. She would know if he was lying; she was good like that. Mind whirling, his arms slipped from her grasp, and wrapped around her waist loosely, pulling her closer to him. She leaned her cheek on his chest, and they stood in silence for a few moments, letting the light wind brush across their bodies.  
  
Finally, Ginny let out a sigh. "If you really can't tell me, Harry, I won't press it," she said quietly, lifting her eyes to his. "But, you know you can talk to me, right? Same deal as in the summer; whenever you need to talk, you know where I am."  
  
He smirked at her. "So, you're saying I can sneak into your dormitory and scare you with my amazing popping head trick?" he asked innocently, a twinkle in his eyes.  
  
She blushed lightly, but gathered her wits and pressed closer to him. "If the urge hits you, sure," she replied, voice lower than normal.  
  
He licked his lips and tightened his hold on her, feeling heat tunnel through his body. She grinned at him, and, leaning up, brushed her mouth against his lightly. Inhaling sharply, he met her, letting himself go after holding the reins of his feelings for the whole day. The hate that had poisoned him since Potions evaporated as she wrapped her arms around his neck and let him pour everything into her without restraint. Whenever he was with her, he couldn't feel anything negative or damning; all he knew was the high he was always on after a meeting or conversation.  
  
When they ran out of air, she let his mouth go with a little chuckle, and rested her chin on his chest. "Have a bad day?" she asked with a little smile.  
  
He sighed, reaching up to brush a few errant strands of hair from her face. "Yeah, for the most part. Was it that obvious?"  
  
She leaned up and kissed his nose. "Yes. Are you upset about Ron?" she asked worriedly.  
  
Shock entered his gaze. "No! Not at all! Ron's a much better choice for Captain than I am. I can't do a full game strategy. I can't even play chess very well. This is very good for the team," he replied confidently.  
  
She eyed him. "I know you were upset last year when he was made a prefect, and you weren't. I was just making sure you were all right now," she commented, curling up to him.  
  
He grinned wryly. "Well, I was a bit...temperamental last year, wasn't I?"  
  
"Just a bit," she said dryly, grinning.  
  
He sighed softly, and rested his chin on her hair, looking out onto the Hogwarts grounds as the sun sank lower below the horizon. And, the time hit him like a hammer. Who knows how long they had been gone? What if someone noticed, and put two and two together? "Ginny, we should go in," he said gently, trying not to sound too urgent.  
  
She nodded underneath his chin. "I know," she replied wistfully, taking a step back from him. He felt very cold all of a sudden, and he didn't like it. She sighed. "I'm cold."  
  
"Me too," he agreed softly, gazing at her.  
  
Ginny gave him a small smile, and passed him to go inside, touching him lightly on the arm as she passed. He smiled but didn't follow her, watching the sky darken from a vibrant red to the dark navy of dusk. Alone with his thoughts, he stayed out there until Professor Sprout saw him and ordered him to go in, and that was when the sky was already prickled with stars.  
  
~*~  
  
"Ginny! Ginny! Wake up!"  
  
Ginny moaned, and rolled over in bed, covering her ears with a pillow. "Go 'way. It's Saturday," she mumbled.  
  
A sigh was heard. "Ginny, Ron told me to wake you up! You have practice, you know."  
  
Another moan. "No..."  
  
The covers were pulled off her, and she yelped as the cool early- morning air hit her legs, night-dress tangled up around her thighs. She cracked an eye open, and saw Hermione observing her with dismay. "You look like you've had a rough night. Maybe I can tell Ron you don't feel well," she offered with a sympathetic gaze.  
  
Ginny shook her head and sat up slowly, pulling her wand out from underneath her pillow. "I had a fine night, Hermione. I'll be ok. Tell him I'll be down at the pitch in ten minutes," she said blearily, rubbing her eyes roughly.  
  
Hermione gave her a grin and walked out of her room briskly. Ginny saw that her fellow dorm mates were still sleeping peacefully with their curtains drawn, and she growled enviously. "Damn Ron," she cursed violently, climbing out of bed as the sun peaked in through her window. She went into the loo to wash up, and gasped.  
  
She had little bruises on her neck that had appeared overnight. A blush suffused her face, and she smoothed her wrinkled night-dress vainly. It was hardly a rough night, sleep-wise. Harry, on the other hand, had got it into his head to sneak into her dorm room before she went to bed under the Invisibility Cloak, and surprise her as she slept. Obviously his Confusion Charm was much stronger than the Founders had anticipated, because she didn't know any other way for him to get past the alarms. He had been particularly playful, and the tiny marks were evidence of that. Thank Merlin she had made him leave when he did, or they might not have been able to stop themselves...  
  
"Looking a bit warm, aren't we dearie?" the mirror asked cheekily.  
  
"Oh, hush up!" Ginny hissed, aiming her wand and muttering some quick charms to cover up the bruises for the moment. She pulled her hair back into a messy ponytail, washed her face, and headed back out to dress as quietly as she could.  
  
The sun was still low on the horizon when she walked out onto the pitch, her Cleansweep Eleven clutched in her hand. Through her blurry gaze she saw the whole team already in the air running drills, and she sped up, dashing across the dew-soaked grass as she heard Ron screaming at her from above.  
  
"It's about time you got here, Ginny!" he exclaimed as she kicked up off the ground and joined them up in the cool late-September air. "Dean and Katie have been waiting for you!"  
  
"Sod off, Ron! I'm only a few minutes late," she snapped, gliding away towards her fellow Chasers. Harry caught her eye, and she felt a blush creep onto her face. He grinned rakishly at her.  
  
"Ok, listen up! I'm going to release the balls now. Dean, Ginny and Katie will practice their moves and shoot with me. I want Harry to deal with the Snitch, and Kirke and Sloper will bash Bludgers at everyone. Got that?" Ron eyed them all after his speech. They nodded quickly, and he grinned. "Ok. Let's do it."  
  
He flew back to the ground, and soon the balls soared up in the air. Ginny grabbed the Quaffle and tossed it to Dean Thomas, who tossed it back. He had made Chaser at tryouts over two weeks ago, as had she. They joined Katie Bell, who was in her last year at Hogwarts. Andrew Kirke and Jack Sloper had stayed on the team as Beaters after replacing Fred and George last year, and Ron was still the Keeper. Everyone had improved greatly over the summer, and had come back refreshed and ready to win again.  
  
Katie sailed past her, smiling lightly as she caught the Quaffle. "You look a bit peaky, Ginny. Did you sleep well?" she asked, tossing the round orange ball towards a hoop, and watched Ron streak to catch it.  
  
Ginny heaved a sigh, ducking her head to hide her blush. "Yes, I'm fine, Katie. I swear it," she called, catching the Quaffle from Ron and throwing it to Dean as they sped around the field.  
  
A Bludger whizzed past her nose, and she turned to glare at Sloper. "You don't need to take my nose off, Jack!"  
  
He grinned. "My apologies," he said gallantly, bowing in her direction before sending the Bludger off towards Harry.  
  
Ron ran the grueling practice for almost two hours, and by the end of it, everyone looked ready to fall off their brooms and keel over. Ginny was sweating and grimy, and after saying a quick farewell to Katie as the older girl headed up to breakfast, she headed for the changing rooms.  
  
After her shower, she took the charm off her neck and examined her skin, standing in front of the mirror only in a towel. The bruises were beginning to fade, to her great relief, but she would have to keep the charm on for a couple more days just to be safe. The water dripped from her curls as she ran her fingers over her neck, skin warming with the memory of what caused the little marks.  
  
Harry always wanted to talk at the oddest times. This same thing had happened just a few days ago, except instead of being thoroughly playful with her, he had been quiet, almost sad as he spoke to her. His energy would shift suddenly like that in a matter of days, even hours. Everyone was starting to notice it, and Professor Lupin had even stopped her after her last class with him yesterday to talk.  
  
***  
  
"Ginny, is Harry all right?"  
  
She looked up at him in shock. "Why would you think I would know, Professor?" she asked carefully, sitting down at his desk.  
  
He seemed uncomfortable. "Well, I had a letter from your mother, and she was under the impression that you and Harry..."  
  
"Oh! She told you?"  
  
He looked oddly relieved. "Yes, she thought it was prudent for me to know. Is there a reason you haven't told anyone else?"  
  
She blushed lightly, looking down at her hands. "Harry wants to keep it a secret. He seems to think I'd be in danger if it was known I was close to him," she replied softly.  
  
"Ah. Well, it's a good idea in theory. But, has he spoken to you about anything to do with Sirius?" His voice had tightened slightly at Sirius' name.  
  
She shook her head. "He doesn't like to talk about it. He only said something to me once during the summer, but since then he's never alluded to it. I think he wants to put it in the back of his mind, and forget it happened, especially since he's back at school. He doesn't want to look weak in front of all his peers," she commented, looking up at the worried man in front of her.  
  
Lupin sighed. "Well, he should talk to someone. Would you tell him he's always welcome to come and see me? He hasn't really talked to me since the start of school."  
  
Ginny smiled slightly. "I'll tell him, Professor. I'm sure he wants to talk to you. He just can't get past himself yet," she said gently, standing and heading for the door.  
  
"Thank you, Ginny. And," he paused as she was about to head out the door, and she turned back to him. He smiled, eyes misting over as if he was remembering something from long ago. "You can call me Remus in private. Harry does."  
  
***  
  
Ginny opened her eyes and sighed in memory, meeting her own gaze in the mirror. That conversation with Lupin had added weight to her own growing concerns over Harry's welfare. She didn't want to push Harry, but he was sucking everything he felt into the deepest protections he had inside himself, and if he didn't open up soon, he would explode when least expected. She had been very gentle with him over the summer. Maybe it was time to get a little tougher.  
  
She flipped her hair over her face and scrunched the damp curls briefly, feeling a stone drop into her stomach. Harry might not like the tough side of her. What if he didn't want her? Her insides churned at the thought, and she flipped her hair back, looking in the mirror.  
  
And meeting a pair of dark, vivid green eyes.  
  
She squealed, and spun around, seeing Harry's head floating not five feet from her. "Damn you, Harry! You shouldn't be in here," she hissed as he laughed at the look on her face.  
  
"But, I had to show you my amazing popping head trick," he explained impudently, a quick swish of a fluid silver cloak revealing the rest of his body. He was still in his Quidditch robes, and her heart fluttered at the sight.  
  
She struggled not to swoon, and glared at him. "Couldn't it have waited until I was dressed?"  
  
He smirked, an eye traveling up her toweled form. "It wouldn't have been as fun, love."  
  
"For who? I'm not having any fun," she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
His eyes darkened and he stepped towards her, hands reaching out to grasp her waist. "Me, Ginny. I'm having lots of fun."  
  
His breath was very hot on her skin, and she felt heat gather unbidden in her body, shuddering lightly through her. He kept her gaze with his as he pulled her to him, resting his mouth near her ear. "I can make this fun for you, Gin. Very fun," he breathed, kissing her earlobe. She jumped in his arms, letting out a breath she hadn't known she was holding until just then. A low chuckle escaped his throat, and his lips pressed against her neck.  
  
Her breath came sharply, and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing his cheek as he kept up his attentions to her neck. She had a feeling that once she got out of here she'd have a few more of those bruises on her neck, if not in other places...  
  
She was jolted out of her Harry-induced daze as one of his hands came across her stomach, tugging gently on her towel as he slanted his mouth across hers. The feelings running through him were explosive, and she felt every one of them. There was mostly desire coursing in him, mixed with what seemed like hate, pain, guilt. She struggled to pull her lips from his insistent mouth, feeling her self-control slip away as fast as her towel was. "Harry! Harry, wait! Please," she gasped when his lips left hers momentarily. Her hands untangled from his unruly hair, and cupped his face, making his gaze focus on her. "Wait a minute, Harry," she echoed gently. "We need to talk."  
  
For moment, he didn't seem to understand her, but soon he nodded, breathing heavily. His hands left her body, and she pulled back from him, a hand going to latch onto her towel. They stared heatedly at each other for a minute, regaining their breath. The look in his eyes frightened her and excited her at the same time.  
  
Suddenly, she giggled lightly. "Hormones, Harry. My goodness," she teased, needing to lighten the mood that had dropped over them.  
  
He cracked a grin, eyes still smoldering at her. "It's those towels you've taken to wearing. They drive me nuts," he replied huskily.  
  
She smiled crookedly, remembering the hate and guilt she had felt pouring from him only a few minutes ago. "Harry, Professor Lupin is worried about you."  
  
He blinked, then let out a short, tense laugh. "Well, that was a bit random."  
  
"Why won't you talk to him?"  
  
He stiffened, and she could see the walls close in around him. "Does it matter?"  
  
"Yes. You should talk to someone, Harry," she said softly, leaning against the sink behind her. "We're all worried, Harry. You go up and down so fast we're afraid to say something wrong, in case you're in the wrong mood!"  
  
"You shouldn't worry, Ginny. I'm fine," he stated coolly, crossing his arms over his chest.  
  
She pursed her lips, and paused momentarily. She had attempted to get him to talk, and he had refused. Wasn't that enough? She had a sinking feeling that if she said anymore, he'd become furious.  
  
But, he had said, "I'm fine." She remembered the fight he and Hermione had had in the summer when he had said that. Soon after that, Ginny had discovered he was far from fine. And the thought of him telling her of all people that he was fine angered her.  
  
"Like hell you're fine, Harry," she blurted out hotly. "You're not fine, and I can't believe you would try to fool me like this! I can feel everything you're going through, and I know you're angry. I know you're hurting."  
  
His eyes were wide with horror. She kept on talking recklessly, feeling the dread rise within her. "You've got to stop this "I'm fine," rubbish, Harry, because I know you're not. Why are you keeping things from me? Don't you trust me?"  
  
He looked outraged. "Of course I trust you, Ginny----"  
  
"Then why don't you tell me anything? I can't be the only one trying to make this work, Harry! It doesn't help that you want our relationship to be a secret, but you want your whole mind to be a secret, too!" she exclaimed, tears welling in her eyes.  
  
Harry gazed at her for a moment, anger darkening his eyes to black. Then, he leaned over to pick up his Invisibility Cloak from where he had dropped it during their kiss, and met her eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry you feel that way, Ginny," he said tonelessly, and walked out of the locker room.  
  
Her legs gave out from underneath her, and she fell onto the stone floor, tears running down her face silently as the best thing in her crazy life walked out for good. So much for tough Ginny being wanted the same way as gentle Ginny.  
  
~*~  
  
Shrewd eyes watched from his hiding place as he saw a tall, dark- haired boy storm out from the girls' changing room, a furious look on his face. The watcher gaze a little shout of surprise. Potter? Why was Potter in the girls' locker room?  
  
A few minutes later, another shock jolted through him as a slim red- head followed in Potter's footsteps, face pale and stained with tears. The youngest Weasley...and Potter? A smirk crossed the watcher's face. His lord would enjoy this. All he needed was the proof.  
  
He would get it.  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Thank you to my wonderful beta, Anne. Hope it wasn't too bad. Please review or email me, and tell me what you think of this. ^^  
  
Harry Potter isn't mine. Thank goodness, eh? ^^  
  
My explanation for O.W.L.s is such: We know that there are at least two in some subjects: theoretical and practical. The ones I figure would have both are: DADA, Transfiguration, Charms, Astronomy and Potions. The ones I think that only have one are History of Magic, Divination, and Care of Magical Creatures. So, let's humor me and say that Harry got both O.W.L.s in DADA, Transfiguration, Charms, and Potions. He also got History of Magic and Care of Magical Creatures. My beta kindly informed me of my inaccurate O.W.L. count. ^^  
  
Can you believe I forgot about Katie Bell? ^^; Oops. 


	3. Three

A/N: I hope no one is under the impression that Harry and Ginny have gotten into a row before the first week of term is done. When we last left our struggling protagonists, my timeline puts me at around late September. So, we're about a month and a half into term.  
  
Harry swore he'd never follow his impulses again.  
  
Here he was, fidgeting nervously in Professor Lupin's office, waiting for the man to come back from breakfast. Why? Because he'd had a sudden impulse to talk to Lupin. He didn't know what he wanted to talk about; he just felt a need to talk to someone who he thought would understand him. And since Ginny wasn't available to him anymore, he had sought out the only other person he felt comfortable talking to about...Sirius.  
  
Ginny.  
  
He groaned softly, and put his head in his hands. It had been almost two weeks since their row, and she hadn't said a word to him since. He couldn't even look at her without wanting to strangle something. That girl had pure nerve to speak to him like that in the changing rooms. Yelling at him for not telling her everything? Bloody stupid of her. Didn't she understand he couldn't just say things like that? It just wasn't in him.  
  
Yet ever since their fight, he'd had a little voice in his head telling him that she was within her rights. It told him he was a very disturbed individual who needed to share his feelings, and Ginny was a perfect person to share with.  
  
It was also the voice that told him he should study more because his N.E.W.T.s were only a year and a half away.  
  
He had labeled it the Hermione Voice. The voice that was usually right in most cases.  
  
He didn't want it to be right. Harry didn't like to share his personal feelings with people unless it was on a neutral topic like Quidditch or school. His soul was his territory, and his alone.  
  
Then why did he want to tell Ginny his inner thoughts all the time?  
  
He reckoned that this separation was for the best. She was out of immediate danger from Voldemort, and he was content inside his iron-clad shell. It was the right choice for both of them.  
  
Then why did he hurt so much when he saw her across the room, not meeting his eyes?  
  
"Harry?"  
  
His head shot up, and he twisted around in his chair to see Lupin standing in the doorway, surprise all over his face. Guilt shot through Harry as he saw the happiness flit into the man's eyes, and he berated himself for not coming sooner. Just the sight of Lupin reminded him that he wasn't the only one who was in pain, and he was being a selfish prat.  
  
Harry forced a grin at the man, holding up a hand. "Hi, Professor," he said.  
  
Lupin smiled slightly at Harry, and closed the door behind him before walking over to his desk. "Hello, Harry. I thought you'd be in Hogsmeade today."  
  
"Oh, I didn't want to go. I had some work to finish up," Harry replied hastily, turning back to face Lupin as he sat down behind his desk. He didn't add that Ron and Hermione had gone to Hogsmeade on a date, leaving him without anyone to go with. Ron had suggested he go with Ginny as a friend, but Harry had refused for obvious reasons.  
  
Lupin nodded, looking weary as he gazed at Harry. "Did you need anything from me?" he asked casually.  
  
Harry tried not to burn with the uncomfortable embarrassment that had come over him. "Well, Professor---"  
  
"Please call me Remus, Harry."  
  
Harry gulped. "I wanted to talk, Remus." The name slipped from his tongue easily, and he was slightly surprised. He wasn't used to calling adults by their first names. Except for Sirius.  
  
Remus grinned slightly, and leaned back in his chair. "All right, Harry. I suppose Ginny spoke to you, then?"  
  
Harry stiffened at the mention of her name, and he fought down the urge to tell Remus everything that had happened. "Yes, she mentioned something," he replied, congratulating himself silently for the control in his voice.  
  
Remus' eyes narrowed at the strain he heard in Harry's voice, and Harry winced. Too much control.  
  
"Is everything all right with you and Ginny?"  
  
Harry's brows came together in confusion. Did Remus know? "I don't think I understand what you mean."  
  
Remus smiled reassuringly. "Molly Weasley wrote to me at the beginning of the year. I know about you and Ginny. Congratulations, Harry. She's a lovely girl."  
  
Some part of Harry's heart swelled at this praise of the girl he cared for, but it was quickly smothered by the despair and anger that he felt towards her. "Don't say that," he muttered, eyes to the floor.  
  
"Did something happen with Ginny?"  
  
Harry looked up quickly at the concern in Remus' voice, and saw the worry in his eyes. He heaved a sigh, and leaned back in his overstuffed chair. "Yes. We had a bit of a row."  
  
Remus nodded, sighing. "I thought so," he commented softly, waving his wand lightly. Two bottles of Butterbeer flew onto the desk from a pouch across the room, and he pushed one towards Harry.  
  
Baffled, Harry reached for the bottle, and twisted it open. "What do you mean? Was it that obvious?" he asked as Remus took a swallow of his drink.  
  
Remus chuckled, a sparkle coming into his eyes. "Harry, I'm not stupid. No, of course it wasn't obvious, but I was friends with both your parents before they were together. They were both stubborn people, and when they fought, they wouldn't speak to each other for days, weeks even. They were completely miserable without each other, but they were too stubborn to see their fault. It seems that you and Ginny are acting the same way," he finished, a note of amusement in his voice.  
  
Harry stayed silent, letting a smile cross his lips. It was interesting to have this connection with his parents. Remus laughed lightly again, and sent a grin at Harry. "I suppose you fought about something silly, like your parents used to, eh?"  
  
Harry's heart plunged into his stomach, and he gulped. "We fought about how I'm not fine like I say I am," he said dryly, taking a swig of his Butterbeer.  
  
Remus' smile died, and he set down his bottle on the desk, looking at Harry gently. "Are you?" he asked softly.  
  
The reflexive affirmation almost came out from his mouth, but Harry saw the searching, hopeful look in his parents' friend's eyes, and suddenly he didn't want to say yes. He knew it was a safe, easy response; but, it wasn't a true response. And he didn't want to lie to the man his father and Sirius had loved as a brother.  
  
There was a pause in the conversation, and the silence was thick in the air. Remus looked as if he wanted to move on from that topic, but Harry finally let his true answer spill out as Remus opened his mouth to speak.  
  
"I don't like the idea of Sirius in Heaven. It bothers me a lot," he blurted out abruptly.  
  
Remus glanced at Harry in mild surprise. "Heaven?" he repeated.  
  
Harry nodded. "I've always thought of Heaven as a sort of prison, you know? It's supposed to be eternal happiness, but you can't see your loved ones anymore, even though you should be able to see them whenever you want, because you're a spirit and you can float around and such."  
  
He paused. "I think Sirius would hate Heaven, because he wouldn't be able to do anything with himself. And even if he could see my parents again, I don't think they'd be happy. I'm not saying Hell is better, but..." he trailed off, looking down at the floor. The embarrassment factor was huge within him right now, but he felt lighter than he had in months. Not since he and Ginny talked in the summer had he felt this...normal.  
  
The room was quiet for a bit and Harry was beginning to regret speaking, but then he heard a dry laugh from Remus, and he looked up. Remus was smiling tiredly at him, nodding his sandy head. "Harry, I know exactly how you feel. And I think you might be right," he said, taking another swallow of his Butterbeer. "I think Sirius died in a way that he wanted to, even if he didn't want to go at all. He died protecting you, and that is something to think about."  
  
Harry drank a bit of his Butterbeer as he took in this information. Dumbledore had said something very similar to him back in June, but he had been too full of his own grief and rage to listen to the older man. Now Remus was saying it, and Harry thought they were both right. And then something Ginny said to him over the summer came back to him, and it made him want to clobber himself for his stupidity towards her:  
  
"They won't die because of you, Harry. They'll die for you."  
  
He groaned, and put his forehead in his hand. "I'm such an idiot," he said guiltily.  
  
Remus looked on in amusement. "Is it Ginny?"  
  
Harry nodded, and Remus chuckled again. "I'm sure you'll screw up enough courage to apologize soon enough. We can only hope she'll accept it. I'm sure you've done something quite bad. It's the Potter in you," he commented, sounding humored.  
  
Harry scowled. "Brilliant."  
  
Remus smiled widely, getting a far-away look in his eyes. "I remember this one spectacular row your parents had in the middle of the Great Hall; Sirius and I were rolling on the floor as your mother completely told James off and stalked out of the Hall, leaving him completely baffled. He didn't even know what he had done to her. It was priceless."  
  
Harry tried not to look too eager as he leaned closer to Remus. "Do you remember any more?" he asked with a grin.  
  
Remus smirked, and nodded. "Let me tell you about this time..."  
  
~*~  
  
"Say something."  
  
"I'm not going to cause a scene with him. Remember the last time I tried to pry? No, you're a man. You say something."  
  
"Just because I'm a man? Aren't you women supposed to be the sensitive ones in the world?"  
  
Harry could barely hold back his laughter as he listened in on the "secret" conversation Ron and Hermione were having in whispers not five feet away from him. He was in his usual chair by the hearth in the common room, reading up on Cross-Species Transfiguration, and his two best friends were sitting close to each other on the sofa near him, sending him furtive glances every once in a while. The room was practically empty as eleven o'clock struck, and students had already wandered off to their own dormitories. Ginny had left a few hours ago, giving Harry the same cool indifference that he had been getting since their row. Harry had wanted to say something-anything-to her, but he had been afraid of her reaction.  
  
Since his long talk with Remus a few days ago, Harry had been looking for an opportunity to talk to Ron and Hermione about his behavior. He felt a need to let his friends know some of what was going on. They would have to be happy with knowing about the Occlumency lessons, because he wasn't feeling comfortable enough with himself to tell them about the prophecy and his feelings about Sirius. It was just too hard to talk about the deep feelings unless he wanted to.  
  
He coughed loudly, looking at his two friends in amusement. "Are you going to include me in this conversation, or will I have to listen in on it from afar?" he asked wryly.  
  
Ron grinned weakly as Hermione blushed, and they both scooted down the sofa closer to his chair. "Harry, we were wondering if there was anything on your mind," she said slowly.  
  
Harry closed his book, and leaned towards their eager faces. "I'm getting Occlumency lessons again," he said softly.  
  
Hermione let out a little gasp, and Ron looked at him incredulously. "But...But what about Snape? Don't you hate the air he breathes?" he asked.  
  
"I'm not getting them from Snape. I'm getting them from Dumbledore," Harry explained, waiting for a reaction on that statement.  
  
Hermione shook her head. "Do you really need them, Harry? Is it that bad with Voldemort now?" she inquired unhappily.  
  
Harry let out a sigh, and leaned back in his chair. "It's a matter of protection, Hermione. This way, I can be sure he doesn't know what I know."  
  
"What do you know?" Ron asked immediately.  
  
"Nothing yet," Harry said quickly. "I would've told you if I knew anything that was going on with the war. This is just as a precaution, in case Voldemort tries something," he finished, rolling his eyes slightly at Ron's shudder.  
  
"Is that all, Harry?" Hermione looked at him carefully.  
  
Harry gulped. He wasn't ready to tell them about the prophecy. Not yet...He wanted some more moments of pure freedom with his friends before the ultimatum was revealed. And, he certainly wasn't going to tell them about Ginny; there was nothing to tell anymore. "Yes, Hermione. That's all. I swear."  
  
Ron frowned lightly. "Good, because we have something we want to tell you," he stated briskly, going into Captain mode.  
  
Harry smirked. "What, getting married already?" he teased, making Hermione blush once more.  
  
Ron grinned slightly. "No, mate. What's up with you and Ginny?"  
  
His blood froze, and Harry looked from Ron to Hermione in complete shock. They didn't know...Did they? "What do you mean?"  
  
"She's been giving you the cold shoulder for almost two weeks, Harry. Considering we're all friends, something must have happened. Friends don't just ignore people like she's been ignoring you," Hermione said sagely, appraising the look on Harry's face suspiciously.  
  
Harry swallowed, and shrugged. "I set her off after Quidditch practice a while ago. She got a bit angry with me, and we're not speaking at the moment," he said as calmly as possible. It wasn't a total lie; he had made her angry...  
  
"Obviously not," Ron commented dryly. "Whenever you two are in the same room, it feels like a thousand Freezing Charms have gone off."  
  
"You should really apologize to her, Harry," Hermione pleaded softly. "She values your friendship, just like we do. It would be a shame if you lost her as a friend."  
  
Harry heaved a sigh, and threw up his hands. "You think I don't understand that? She won't let me talk to her anywhere! I want to apologize, but she won't let me," he said dully, slouching in his chair.  
  
Ron shook his head. "Whatever you do, mate, do it soon. The match with Slytherin is in less than three weeks, and I don't want a broken team, dammit! I want unity!" He pounded his fist into his palm. "And this is Ginny; I don't like to see her hurt."  
  
Harry smirked slightly. "You sound like Oliver Wood. All this concern for her, and I'm the one agonizing over it. Where's your concern for me?"  
  
The red-headed boy looked at his friend, and shrugged. "Mate, I know you can handle whatever comes your way. You're a tough bloke. I just don't want my baby sister to get hurt," he replied, collecting the books Hermione had scattered around her.  
  
Harry looked on as Ron and Hermione said goodnight to each other, Ron's words weighing on his mind. Could he handle everything that came his way? No. He couldn't handle grief. Something that had been so prevalent in his life since he was a child was breaking him now.  
  
Would he hurt Ginny? Could he give her a safe life? She had told him that she would die for him; did that mean she accepted the danger of being with him? He only wished he could ask her. But he couldn't now. Damn him for being an idiot!  
  
"Harry? Are you ready to go up, mate?"  
  
He looked up at Ron quickly, and nodded. "Yeah, let's go," he said hurriedly, grabbing his book and following Ron up the stairs to their dormitories. Somehow, he didn't think he'd sleep well tonight.  
  
~*~  
  
"Now, for your homework I would like you to..."  
  
Ginny sighed, rested her chin on her hand, and closed her eyes, tuning out Professor McGonagall as the last class of the day wound down. She could feel Colin poking her to make her pay attention, but she was just too tired. She hadn't had a good night's sleep in almost three weeks, and it was all Harry's fault.  
  
Bloody git. She had only wanted to release all the anger and grief he had bottled up inside. The way he had been acting, no one would've been able to get him to open up if she hadn't said something to him! There was no justification for his complete withdrawal from her; she had only been trying to help.  
  
Still...  
  
Had she pushed too hard? Once she had got it into her head to say something to him, had she overwhelmed him? She had been gentle, pliable Ginny for months; was tough Ginny too much of a stretch?  
  
Maybe he just didn't want all of her. It was perfectly reasonable; she had been a willing girl in a house full of men. Harry had needed comfort. She had given it willingly. Was that all she was to him? Somewhere to get a free snog before he---perish the thought! ---let his emotions run wild? A security blanket there on call?  
  
He had said that she made him happy; had she even stopped to realize what that could mean?  
  
It hurt to think of their relationship like that. She could feel her heart break for the thousandth time as she ran over the words in her mind. It was a horrible, deep-seated pain that would never leave her, but she would learn to live with it. If he didn't want every part of her, she wouldn't take on all of him. It was that simple.  
  
It was never that simple when it came to her feelings for Harry.  
  
"C'mon, Ginny. Time to go!"  
  
Colin's words started her out of her half-asleep state, and she opened her eyes, reaching for her bag blindly. "Thanks, Colin. What's the essay on?" she asked hurriedly, standing from her seat as her classmates flooded out of the room.  
  
Colin rolled his eyes. "You should pay attention, Ginny. It's on the effects on an object that has been improperly Vanished," he informed her, grabbing his bag and heading for the door. "Are you coming to dinner now?"  
  
She smiled weakly, and shook her head. "Not yet, Colin. Go on ahead. I need to go up to the common room first. See you."  
  
He gave a wave, and left the classroom, leaving only Ginny and Professor McGonagall in the room. Ginny grabbed the rest of her things quickly, and left before McGonagall could notice she was still there. She headed up to the common room using a longer path to avoid the crowds of students headed to the Great Hall, lost in thought. Sleepiness was settling on her eyes, and she had a great trouble keeping them open as she rounded a corner, gaze on the stone floor ahead of her.  
  
"Damn!"  
  
She recognized the voice that cursed as she ran into a hard form, tumbling to the floor in her exhaustion. Landing flat on her back, she closed her eyes. Her muscles ached, and in her embarrassment, she tried to use a Vanishing Spell on herself. It didn't work.  
  
There was a moment of quiet punctuated only by the sounds of nervous breathing. Then, a deep breath. "Are you all right, Ginny?"  
  
Inwardly, she moaned. Why did he have to say her name like that? Sitting up, her head ached, and she reached for her bag, which had fallen by his feet, keeping her eyes on the floor. "I'm fine. Thanks," she replied evenly, grabbing her bag and standing as quickly as she could. The world swam around her, and she reached out for something to steady herself on as the blood rushed from her head. She grabbed cloth.  
  
His hand was on her elbow and she loved and hated the warmth pulsing in her veins from his touch. "You're not. Let me take you up to Madam Pomfrey."  
  
She hated the concern in his tone, and her anger swooped down upon her as quickly as it had left. "Now you care, don't you?" she cried, tugging against his grasp. "Done with the emotional turmoil of the month, Harry? Have you built up those walls any higher?"  
  
She couldn't meet his eyes, but she felt his hot gaze on her skin, and his grip grew tighter on her arm. "Stop it, Ginny. Don't talk like that."  
  
Her gaze was blinded by the angry tears welling behind her eyes, and she looked up into his face. "Don't talk at all, right Harry? Just let you take care of me, and make me calm down again so you can have your constant comfort back? There are other pretty girls in this school, Harry; go find comfort from them," she spat out, pulling away from him as she saw the shock dart across his face. Her back hit solid stone wall, and she sagged against it as he came towards her, grasping her shoulders.  
  
"How can you say that? That's not why I want you, Ginny! I don't see you like that," he said roughly.  
  
She glared up at him with blurry eyes. "Prove it! You're only missing how easy it was with me, right? It's too bad I rediscovered my backbone? Now I want to know what you're thinking about sometimes. What a shame," she retorted, shoving him away from her.  
  
He was irate; she could see it in his eyes. But, it wasn't directed at her. He was angry...at himself? "Tell me what to say. I didn't mean what I said that morning," he said heatedly.  
  
She pursed her lips and let out a short, bitter laugh. "That's the problem, Harry. You didn't say anything," she replied sadly, and walked away from him, blood icy in her veins.  
  
~*~  
  
Broom in hand, she was perfectly calm as Ron began his pre-game pep talk, going on about team unity with pointed looks at both her and Harry. She ignored him, keeping her gaze steady on the wall behind him. If her mind was on Harry, she wouldn't be able to concentrate on the game. This was undoubtedly the most important game of the season; the match against Slytherin. It mattered for the keeping of House pride more than the race for the Cup; the Gryffindor team hadn't lost against Slytherin since Harry had arrived five years ago, and Ron was not about to lose now.  
  
The crowd roared from the stands, and Ginny could imagine the seas of red and gold glittering against the grey November sky. She was itching to go outside, ready for the fight; anything to keep her from the painful thoughts of Harry that haunted her since their latest row almost two weeks ago.  
  
Ron coughed, bringing her attention back to him. "Just play as a team is what I want to say, mates. A team that flies together wins together." He looked more sober than she had ever seen him before. "Let's go."  
  
He turned briskly and made for the door, scarlet robes swirling behind him. Kirke and Sloper followed him, and Dean, Katie and Ginny were on their heels. She heard Harry come into step behind her, and heat rose on her face unbidden. They halted at the door of the changing room, and waited for the announcer to come on.  
  
"Wonder who it'll be this year, now that Lee's gone," Dean muttered to Ginny and Katie as there was a kind of quiet in the stadium.  
  
"Good morning to you all, and welcome to the first match of the season!"  
  
The whole Gryffindor team looked at each other in shock as Dennis Creevey's voice rang out clear and strong in the air. "Dennis?" Kirke said, baffled.  
  
"Sounds good. Nice and biased, don't you think?" Katie giggled.  
  
"Now, let's bring out the teams! For Slytherin, we have: PERRY! CRABBE! GOYLE! WARRINGTON! JONAS! HULETT! MALFOY!"  
  
It braced everyone to hear more jeers than cheers as the Slytherin team flew out. Ron opened the door, and looked back to Harry. "Get it, or die trying, mate," he said, tone completely serious.  
  
Ginny rolled her eyes, and spoke before she even thought about what she was saying. "Honestly, Ron! You sound like Wood. Harry always gets the Snitch."  
  
Everyone's eyes turned to her in mild surprise, and she blushed lightly. That was the first nice thing she had said about Harry in about a month.  
  
"Now, let's have the Gryffindor team: WEASLEY! KIRKE! SLOPER! THOMAS! BELL! WEASLEY! POTTER!"  
  
Ron flew out, leading his team into the cold air as cheers went up around the students. They circled the field swiftly, and set down by Madam Hooch. Montague was standing by her as Ron came up, an ugly sneer on his face. Ginny looked over their opponents as Ron and Perry crushed each other's hands. Everyone looked rather ill on the Slytherin side; Malfoy was talking quietly with Crabbe and Goyle, pointing discreetly at Harry. A smirk crossed his face as he saw Ginny watching, and he made a motion of knocking someone off their broom, looking quite triumphant as her face grew pale. She moved to speak, but Katie grabbed her wrist.  
  
"Come on, time to play," the older girl said with a grin, kicking off the ground. A chilly breeze was blowing, and Ginny wished she had worn something warmer than the jeans and t-shirt she had underneath her Quidditch robes as she joined her team in the air, moving over to Kirke and Sloper as they adjusted their grips on their bats.  
  
"I think Crabbe and Goyle are up to something, boys. Will you watch them for me?" she asked quietly. They nodded.  
  
The whistle blew, and her attention turned to the red ball floating in front of her. She heard the whiz of a Bludger as it flew towards her, and she dived out of harm's way, grabbing the Quaffle as she swerved out of Hulett's path. A gasp went up in the crowd as Dennis began his commentary. "Lord, look at Weasley go! She was Seeker last year after that unfortunate ban of Potter, and you can see that come into her Chaser skills. Very pretty girl, besides---"  
  
"Creevey, please!"  
  
"Sorry, Professor. Anyway, Weasley with the Quaffle as she passes it to Thomas, another new addition this year..."  
  
Ginny grinned as she tuned Dennis out, speeding towards the Slytherin goals. Dean tossed her the Quaffle and she pushed her broom up higher, bringing Jonas and Hulett with her. Katie appeared right below her, and she dropped the ball down. Katie shot it at the goals, and it went through the center hoop as Perry dived recklessly for it. A cheer went up, and the score was ten-nil.  
  
The game continued, Gryffindor taking a large lead by thirty minutes in. It was seventy-ten when Ginny saw Crabbe and Goyle conversing quickly from the corner of her eye. She swerved past Sloper as she threw the Quaffle to Dean, and turned her face. "Jack! Get them!" she called nervously.  
  
Sloper nodded, and she turned back. Then, a cry of outrage went up in the stadium, and her eyes went to below. Harry had just been pummeled by a Bludger right between the shoulder blades, and he was clutching his broom, knuckles white with pain. Ron called time quickly, and the team flew down to Harry as he straightened up, breathing heavily.  
  
"What'd you call time for, Ron? I'm fine," he said crossly, face strained.  
  
"Are you sure, mate?" Ron asked suspiciously.  
  
"What happened to "Get it or die," eh? I'm going to get the bloody Snitch. Go back up!" Harry exclaimed.  
  
Ron nodded, and the rest of them flew back up to the hoops. Sloper came up to Ginny. "Sorry, Ginny. I didn't see it."  
  
She shook her head. "It's all right."  
  
The whistle blew, and the game continued. Ginny caught a wild pass from Katie, who had tried to avoid a Bludger as she had thrown, and was sent into a steep dive. A gasp went through the crowd, and she struggled to pull herself up, passing Malfoy as she went towards the hoops. He smirked. "Potter's getting off easy, Weasley! He'd better keep an eye out," he jeered, knocking into her as he went by.  
  
She was jolted off her broom, hanging on by one hand as she looked for someone to throw to. "Dean!" she called frantically as Jonas shot towards her, arm outstretched. Her wrist went back as he grabbed onto her sleeve, and she threw the Quaffle recklessly up to Dean as he passed above her. He caught it and shot at the hoops. It went in, and another cheer went up. Ginny climbed back onto her broom, and flew up to join her fellow Chasers as play commenced once more.  
  
Crabbe and Goyle weren't with everyone else. Her heart stopped, and she looked below her. They were racing towards Harry, bats in hand. Harry was circling the pitch lazily, looking for a flash of gold in complete ignorance. Ginny swallowed, and looked for Sloper or Kirke. Hulett had rammed into Katie, making her drop the Quaffle, and they were aiming at him. Warrington was harassing Dean, and Ron was waving at Madam Hooch for a penalty. No one else saw what was going on with Harry. Ginny took a deep breath, made a quick decision---  
  
And dived.  
  
Harry turned to see Crabbe and Goyle ready to run him over in mid-air and his face went pale. He tried to move, but Malfoy was underneath him, holding the tail of his broom with a malicious smile. Ginny heard Harry cursing loudly, and pushed her broom as fast as it would go. She swerved in front of him as the Beaters were about to run him down.  
  
The crowd was silenced as a sickening crash was heard, mixed with a scream of agony, Harry's cry of disbelief and Malfoy's shout of triumph.  
  
"SWEET MERLIN, DID YOU SEE THAT PROFESSOR? THE SLYTHERIN BEATERS JUST MOWED DOWN GINNY WEASLEY IN MID-AIR!"  
  
Pain laced through her, and she felt something crack on her side as she fell from her broom and hit frozen earth, her right arm twisted at a funny angle. She couldn't move even if she wanted to, the hurt was so overwhelming. Cries of horror filled the pitch, and she heard Madam Hooch berating Crabbe, Goyle and Malfoy as Harry's stricken face swam in front of her eyes. She tried to crack a smile, but couldn't.  
  
"What happened, Harry?" Ron called anxiously, sending death stares at the smirking Slytherin threesome.  
  
Harry's mouth opened and closed several times, and she felt his hands on her shoulders. Professor McGonagall appeared above her with Professor Lupin and Dumbledore, fury all over her tight face. "Miss Weasley needs to go to the Hospital Wing right away! Potter, Weasley; step back! The game is not over yet," she commanded.  
  
There was a murmuring from Lupin, and Ginny found herself floating in the air by Lupin's waist. "I will take her up myself, boys. She'll be fine," he said softly, quelling Harry's silent protests.  
  
Ginny struggled to speak. "Ron...Finish the damn game..." she whispered.  
  
Both boys looked at her in awe, and Ron cracked a grin. "We'll win, Gin. Don't worry about that," he promised darkly. Harry nodded, unable to speak. She smiled, let herself listen to Dennis once more, and passed out.  
  
"And, it seems that Crabbe, Goyle and Malfoy have all been suspended from the game as a result of this incident! They are being led to the changing rooms by Professor Snape...The Gryffindor team looks ready to kill...I'd be quite afraid if I was anyone on the Slytherin team..."  
  
~*~  
  
He didn't remember how he had caught the tiny golden ball; he didn't remember how he had got to the ground. All he knew was racing up to the castle on Ron's heels, Hermione and the rest of the team behind him. The time between Ginny's fall and their rush to the castle was a complete blur, and would remain so for years to come. There was only one thought in his mind: Ginny.  
  
As they trooped up the stairwells and down the corridors to the Hospital Wing, Harry was amazed with the girl. After all the angry things they had said to one another in the past month, she'd still taken a beating for him. That reassured him that she didn't hate him as he thought she might, and it scared him at the same time. Did that mean she had meant what she said in the summer? She would die for him?  
  
"Oh, for heaven's sake! All of you are here?"  
  
Madam Pomfrey stood in the waiting area of the Hospital Wing, looking quite put out. Harry suppressed a grin; she never was one for visitors in her domain.  
  
"We've got to see her. Please!" Ron pleaded. The group behind him nodded vigorously.  
  
The nurse pursed her lips, and nodded shortly. "Ten minutes! That's all you get. She's taken quite a beating, poor thing. Surprised her head hasn't cracked open." She looked at the group sternly. "If you disturb her in any way, I will be here to make you pay."  
  
Harry gulped and nodded, following Ron past the formidable witch. Ginny was lying on her pristine bed, arm in a sling and a bruise on one side of her face, face turned towards the window. Harry could see the impatience in her eyes, and he almost laughed. She was quite the girl, taking a dangerous fall for the team and still wanting to be out there in the game.  
  
Ron must have been thinking the same, because he let out a chuckle. "Not sure what all the fuss is about; you look ready for a game to me," he commented cheerfully.  
  
Her face turned, and she smiled brightly at her visitors. Harry could see the forcedness of the cheer; she was in serious pain. "Did we win?" she asked worriedly.  
  
Everyone looked at each other, looked back and nodded, grins breaking out onto their faces. Ginny sighed, and settled back against her pillows more comfortably. "Good; I didn't want my sacrifice to go for nothing," she quipped lightly.  
  
Hermione came over to one side of her bed, followed by Katie and Dean, concern all over her face. "What could make you do such a rash thing? Crabbe and Goyle must weigh ten times more than you do! You could've been killed," she admonished, looking relieved to see Ginny so well-off. Harry could only imagine what the incident must have looked like from the crowd. He shuddered unnoticed.  
  
Ginny gave a tiny shrug. "It was Ron's pep talk. Team unity. The team that flies together dies together."  
  
"I said "wins," not "dies," you silly girl," Ron interjected.  
  
She smiled. "Same difference," she teased, meeting Harry's eyes. "Did we thrash them?"  
  
Ron was about to answer, but Harry beat him to it. "Three hundred to twenty," he replied, looking in her eyes. They were warm, dark, and full of something he didn't understand. He wanted to understand very badly; he wanted her to help him understand.  
  
She wet her lips slightly. "That's quite a thrashing," she murmured.  
  
Everyone looked between him and Ginny, anxiously wondering if the great split would be mended. There had been a month of chill between the two friends; could her actions today have helped to melt their cold shoulders?  
  
Harry took a deep breath and stepped closer to her. "I'm sorry, Ginny. I didn't mean what I said," he said softly, pleading with his gaze for forgiveness. Even if they couldn't go back to the way it was before, he still wanted to be her friend. Maybe it would be better if they could start over; he could start by talking to her. Then, maybe they could move back into their old relationship.  
  
If she still wanted him.  
  
She smiled gently. "It's all right, Harry. Friends?" she asked, holding out her free hand to him.  
  
He grinned, taking her hand. "Friends," he echoed, running his thumb over her knuckles lightly and furtively, and raised an eyebrow at her.  
  
Hermione sighed. "Well, it took you long enough to apologize, Harry," she chided.  
  
Harry shrugged, setting Ginny's hand on her stomach gently. "I'm a stubborn fool," he said simply, letting his fingers brush her skin as he released her hand. She quirked an eyebrow at him, her dark gaze questioning him silently. There was nothing he wanted to do more than kiss her at that moment.  
  
He didn't know how long this understanding would take, but he hoped it wouldn't take too long.  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Cheers! I hope that wasn't too disappointing. Please read and review! Many thanks to Anne; she's a real goddess! ^^  
  
Harry Potter isn't mine in any way. Be glad. ^_^ 


	4. Four

"Legilimens."  
  
At once a flash of Ginny lying in the Hospital Wing entered Harry's mind, and he tried to block it, sending a Stinging Hex from his wand. He toppled backwards, hitting the back of his head on a desk, and moaned.  
  
"Excellent, Harry. That was a very good hex."  
  
He opened his eyes to see Dumbledore smiling genially down at him, a red welt shining on the back of his wand hand. Harry shrugged, rubbing the back of his head. "Thanks. I've had some practice," he said bitterly, getting to his feet.  
  
The headmaster chuckled lightly. "You mean with your lessons with Professor Snape? Oh yes, he told me," he added at Harry's wondering expression. "He wasn't very amused, to say the least."  
  
"Good," Harry muttered under his breath as he collapsed into a nearby chair, holding his head in his hand. He could feel a bump already swelling under his hair, joining the two other ones from only a few minutes ago. "How much did you see?" he asked, looking up at Dumbledore as the older man took a seat behind his desk.  
  
Dumbledore smiled. "Just Miss Weasley in her bed from a few weeks ago, after the Quidditch game. How is she, by the way?"  
  
Harry heaved a heavy sigh, closing his eyes. "She's fine, sir. We had a practice on Saturday, and she looked quite all right," he replied, feeling quite unhappy. He and Ginny had developed a tentative friendship once more, but she didn't seem to want to move past that. At the beginning, he was just glad to be talking with her again. Now, after almost a month of polite greetings and neutral discussions, he was getting aggravated. He wanted to be able to hold her again, to talk to her about what he was feeling.  
  
Dumbledore smiled distantly. "It was a very brave thing she did in that game, Harry. A true Gryffindor, if I may say so." He sighed in contentment. "My old House has proved itself well these last years."  
  
A grin crossed Harry's face, and the portraits that had been in Gryffindor House applauded happily. "Good girl, that Weasley is," he heard Dilys murmur to her neighbor.  
  
"Wasn't she the one that opened the Chamber, Dumbledore?" Phineas Nigellus commented wryly amidst the clapping.  
  
Harry rolled his eyes as Dumbledore raised a silver eyebrow at the portrait. "You know exactly what occurred Miss Weasley's first year, Phineas. I do not believe there is any reason to bring it up right now," he said calmly, Summoning two steaming cups of tea from across the room, and setting one in front of Harry.  
  
Phineas shrugged indifferently. "I always thought she and Potter would be connected in some way after that unfortunate incident."  
  
Harry blushed lightly, and Dumbledore took a sip of tea. "Well, you were correct, but that is another story. How are you getting along, Harry?"  
  
"Well enough, I suppose," Harry said dully, thinking without amusement at the hate he felt every time he saw Snape's greasy head anywhere in the castle; his struggle in keeping awake in History of Magic; Ginny's calm façade. Then, his mind perked up, and he met Dumbledore's eyes. "Can you tell me anything that's going on with the Order?" he queried hopefully.  
  
Dumbledore looked at Harry thoughtfully for a moment, and set his cup down. "Fudge is cooperating with us, but he isn't happy about it. Aurors are being used as guards in Azkaban. We're trying to track down the Dementors, but we're having a bit of trouble. It's very difficult on the whole, Harry."  
  
There was silence in the room but for the easy breathing of the portraits. Harry swallowed. "I wish I could help out in some way," he said softly.  
  
Dumbledore smiled kindly at him. "You help more than you know, Harry. Don't be too concerned, please." He paused for a moment. "I'm glad you've started to talk to Professor Lupin. He is very happy to be able to have the chance."  
  
Harry wished he could talk to Lupin right now, but he was unavailable, because of the full moon tomorrow night. He knew his father's friend would be able to help him with the Ginny situation. But, Professor Dumbledore was nice to talk with. He felt somewhat like a grandfather, and that comforted Harry. "Thank you, sir. I'm glad I've started to talk to him."  
  
The headmaster looked at Harry thoughtfully. "Harry, there is something in my vault at Gringott's I believe you might like," he started slowly, grabbing Harry's attention. "It's your mother's wedding band."  
  
Harry's stomach twisted, and he swallowed. Dumbledore went on, a knowing sparkle in his eye. "I recovered it from the house the night we took you to your aunt's home, and have kept it for you. I think this might be the right time to give it to you," he finished quietly, gazing at Harry serenely.  
  
Harry gulped. His mother's wedding ring? That would be the perfect Christmas gift for Ginny! Not that he wanted to get married yet, but she would appreciate the significance. If she still wanted a gift from him by Christmas. "Thank you, sir. I would appreciate it a lot," he said, feeling a mixture of happiness and illness. To have something of his mother's...He had had the Invisibility Cloak since his first year, which was his father's, but he had never had anything of his mother's.  
  
Dumbledore nodded, and looked at the intricate timepiece on his wall behind Harry. "It seems as though it is time for you to go, Harry. See you next Tuesday, and please don't hesitate to come to me during the week," he said, blue eyes twinkling merrily.  
  
Harry grinned, and stood. "Bye, Professor." He gave a little wave and walked out of Dumbledore's office to the farewells of the portraits. He chuckled as the gargoyle opened for him, and he saw Ron and Hermione waiting for him, hands intertwined at their sides. "Been here long?"  
  
Ron shook his head. "Not at all, mate. How'd it go?"  
  
Harry shrugged as they started down the hall, Hermione walking between him and Ron. "Fine. I'm starting to use my mind more and my wand less, and that's an improvement," he commented cheerfully, wishing that Ginny was with him right now.  
  
Hermione let out a sigh of relief. "I'm glad, Harry. This is extremely important," she said as they rounded a corner.  
  
Ron rolled his eyes at Harry over his girlfriend's head. "You think he didn't know that, 'Mione?" he teased.  
  
Hermione blushed and smacked Ron on the arm. "Don't call me that, Ron! I hate nicknames," she hissed as Harry chuckled, raising an eyebrow at Ron.  
  
Ron smirked. "I know, Hermione," he egged her, grinning at Harry. "She hates when I use nicknames," he said in a mock-whisper.  
  
Harry snorted. "Imagine that."  
  
The talk turned to schoolwork, and Harry knew it was a night to keep for later times; this kind of peace and happiness couldn't last forever.  
  
~*~  
  
Ginny struggled to heave the strap of her bulging schoolbag over her shoulder, shoulder aching. She leaned against a wall near the History of Magic classroom she had just exited and sighed, pushing her hair from her eyes. The books in her bag were causing her great pain; the homework assigned wasn't making her day much better.  
  
Merlin, she was looking forward to the holidays.  
  
"Almost Christmas," she muttered to herself like a mantra. "Almost Christmas, almost Christmas..."  
  
"Ginny, come on! Library's awaiting; if we get there soon, we might get a good table," Colin called from the end of the corridor.  
  
She let out a soft groan. "Colin, I don't want to study tonight. It's Friday, for Merlin's sake!" she exclaimed unhappily, straightening up and starting to walk towards him. A crowd of students jostled her and she bit back a growl.  
  
Colin frowned. "Well, we won't get any work done tomorrow. Hogsmeade, remember?"  
  
She huffed. "Then we won't go!"  
  
He shifted uncomfortably as she neared him. "I've got to go, Ginny. I'm meeting Lila Pierce at the Three Broomsticks," he said with a blush.  
  
"Oh!" She stopped a few feet from him, looking into his eyes curiously. If Colin was meeting the girl from Hufflepuff, then she wouldn't have anyone to go with, except Harry, Ron and Hermione. And she really didn't want to go with them; the urge to kiss Harry senseless was growing more powerful every time she saw him. "Well, then I'll stay here, Colin. Don't worry! You go on to the library, and I'll see you in the common room."  
  
He looked unhappily at her as another group of giggling girls came down the corridor. "Well, Ginny..."  
  
She heaved a sigh. "Colin, go. I'll be quite fine. I need to do some work for Muggle Studies anyway, and you don't take that class. Go on then!"  
  
He smiled tentatively at her, a smile she returned. As he went around the corner, someone jostled her roughly and she fell to the floor, wincing as she came in contact with the cold stone. A gasp went up, and someone grasped her elbow. "Merlin, I'm sorry! Let me help you!"  
  
Ginny grunted thanks as she got to her feet, and looked into the dark eyes of Cho Chang.  
  
The two girls stared at each other in silence for a moment, and Ginny remembered their last meeting painfully. She had caught the Snitch from under Cho's nose, winning the Quidditch Cup for Gryffindor, and caused an unhappy reaction from the Ravenclaw girl that consisted of thrown brooms. Her boyfriend at the time, Michael Corner, had become unbearable after that game, so she had broken up with him and he went running straight to Cho. Another wave of embarrassment swooped over her as she realized that this was Harry's old flame.  
  
Cho smiled hesitantly at her. "I'm dreadfully sorry about that, Ginny. Are you all right?"  
  
Ginny found her voice after a few seconds. "Yes, thanks. I'm sure it looked worse then it actually felt," she said dryly.  
  
Cho giggled quietly. An uncomfortable silence fell over the two girls, and Cho bent down to pick up Ginny's fallen bag. "Good job at the Quidditch game," she said softly. "That was amazing what you did for Harry."  
  
Ginny felt like she had been punched in the stomach, and she gulped, taking her bag. "Thanks. I didn't really think about it," she muttered, a blush rising to her cheeks.  
  
"Well, look at that! Both of Potter's whores! I wonder if he ever has a threesome!" Draco Malfoy's jeering voice echoed from the other end of the corridor, and both girls swung around to glare angrily at the smirking teen.  
  
"Sod off, Malfoy! Not even one girl would bloody touch you with an eighty-foot pole, let alone two," Ginny retorted, leveling her wand at his face from a distance. Her heart was pounding erratically; how did Malfoy know about her and Harry? Or was he just making a lucky guess? "Don't make me turn your face into a wing-covered mess again!"  
  
"It might make him look better though, you reckon?" Cho commented quickly.  
  
A cheer and a laugh went up from all non-Slytherins in the corridor, and Malfoy sulked off with his posse, glaring hatefully at the girls as he left. Ginny smirked as she pocketed her wand, and turned back to Cho. "What a git," she said darkly.  
  
Cho nodded, looking curiously at Ginny. "Are you Harry's girlfriend?" she asked softly.  
  
Pain spread in Ginny's veins, and she held back a cry of grief. "No, I'm not."  
  
Not anymore.  
  
Cho looked a bit surprised, but it cleared from her face almost immediately. "Oh. All right, then. Well, I better go. See you around, Ginny," she said gently, walking past Ginny towards a waiting Michael Corner at the end of the corridor.  
  
Ginny watched her greet Michael with a kiss, and a twinge of sorrow went through her. She wanted to be able to do that with Harry, but she didn't want to be hurt again. It always hurt.  
  
Somehow, she dragged herself to the common room, and collapsed into her favorite chair across the room from the hearth. Harry was sitting over there with Ron and Hermione, and she couldn't help but hear Hermione's concerned words to Harry, seeing as how the room was practically empty.  
  
"Harry, are you sure you don't mind? We won't go without you if you don't want us to," the bushy-haired girl said uncertainly.  
  
Harry shook his head. "Are you kidding me? Go. It's ok. You two deserve it, after all the stuff I make you put up with," he said cheerfully, but Ginny could hear the forcedness to his voice.  
  
Ron noticed Ginny's curious gaze, and he waved her over. "Ginny! Why are you sitting over there by yourself? Come here!"  
  
She sighed, heaved her bag into her arms, and made her way over to the hearth, giving a friendly smile to the three of them as she sat down on the floor by Harry's chair. "Hi. What's going on?" she asked innocently.  
  
Harry chuckled. "They're leaving me to fend for myself while they go off on a date to Hogsmeade," he explained.  
  
Her heart leapt into her throat, and she noted Ron and Hermione's blushing faces with amusement. "Well, imagine that. Colin's done the same to me," she said lightly, trying not to think of the implications.  
  
Hermione's eyebrows rose. "Well, why don't you and Harry go together?"  
  
"No!" Harry and Ginny exclaimed at the same time, blushing furiously and not meeting the other's eyes.  
  
Hermione huffed as Ron chuckled. "Well, if it seems like such a bad idea to you both..."  
  
"No, it's not that," Ginny began hurriedly, but was cut off by Harry.  
  
"Don't deny it, Ginny. The thought of a whole day alone with me must be terrifying," he joked. There was an edge in his voice that she caught and she looked up at him in surprise. The truth in his eyes scared her; he honestly thought she didn't want him anymore!  
  
"No, actually it's not, Harry. I would go, but I have some work to do in the library tomorrow," she said softly, resisting the urge to look away from his vivid gaze.  
  
He raised an ebony brow. "Imagine that. So do I," he commented.  
  
She wanted to gape at him as Hermione clapped her hands in glee. "Lovely! Go to the library together; I'm sure you'll get a lot of work done."  
  
Ron smirked. "Gives Harry a reason to stop his whinging about being left alone all day."  
  
Harry threw a mock glare at his red-haired friend. "Shove it, Weasley, or I'll quit the team," he threatened overdramatically.  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "I know where you sleep, mate. Just try to quit my team!"  
  
Hermione giggled helplessly, and Ginny grinned. "You two are ridiculous," she stated cheerfully.  
  
Harry met her gaze. "Dare to go to the library with me tomorrow?"  
  
"I dare say I could survive your company," she said lightly, heart pounding wildly in contrast. She had basically thrown herself into the wolves' den.  
  
What was she thinking?  
  
~*~  
  
Palms sweating, he walked into the silent library, bag over his shoulder. With a polite nod to Madam Pince, who looked quite agitated at the fact that there were students not at Hogsmeade and in the Library, he went off to the back tables, searching for a familiar curly head of hair.  
  
What was he thinking?  
  
Oh, it had been a bright idea last night, in front of Ron and Hermione; but Harry was now thinking that he had been quite stupid. How was he supposed to get through a few hours of studying with the one girl he'd rather be snogging more than anything? And she obviously didn't want to be alone with him anyway.  
  
Again, what was he thinking?  
  
"Harry!"  
  
There she was, red hair pulled back into a neat bun at the nape of her neck, sitting calmly at a hard to see table at the very back of the Library, a table hidden from Madam Pince's view by at least ten bookshelves. Harry had to give her credit; she knew where the best spots were. He had seen a lot more than reading going on at tables like this...  
  
Not that he and Ginny were going to do anything that resembled stuff like that.  
  
He heaved a sigh, smiled, and headed over, plunking his bag down in the seat opposite her. She grinned cheerfully at him, and he wanted to curse and destroy shelves. Where was her inner turmoil? Did she even understand what he was going through?  
  
"Morning, Harry! I suppose Ron and Hermione have gone off?" she asked, flipping a page in her book casually.  
  
Harry resisted the urge to shove the book off the table and make her look at him. "Yes, they've left. Colin's gone, too?"  
  
She nodded, scanning her book. "Yes. Off to meet a girl."  
  
"Ah."  
  
And all conversation came to a screeching, ill-executed halt.  
  
The silence was unbearable for him. As the minutes ticked by, and she got further into her book, he was swallowed up in his own torture. This didn't feel like a fun, relaxing afternoon of studying with Ginny. This felt like a tension-driven date with Cho.  
  
Was Ginny going to become like Cho? A girl who nodded politely in the corridor when he passed and only kept his company because her brother told her to?  
  
He did not want Ginny to become another Cho.  
  
"Talk to me, Ginny."  
  
She looked up at him for the first time since he sat down, and he saw the muted pain swimming in her dark eyes. A wave of regret fell over him; he should have talked to her about this sooner.  
  
He reached over and closed her book, pushing it towards the other end of the table. "I want to talk to you, Ginny. Can we talk instead of study?" he asked softly.  
  
She nodded slowly. Harry sighed. "What are we right now, Ginny? Are we friends? Are we more?"  
  
"Of course we're friends, Harry. Don't be silly. I'll always be your friend," she replied immediately.  
  
"Well, I don't feel like I'm sitting with a friend, Gin. Why won't you look at me?" he asked tersely, trying to keep his voice low.  
  
"Why won't you stop looking at me?" she shot back, voice rising.  
  
He clamped a hand on her wrist nervously. "Because you look bloody gorgeous today and I can't help myself," he hissed unthinkingly, watching the shock grow in her eyes. He leaned over, putting them forehead to forehead. "Do you want me to stop, Gin?" he inquired softly.  
  
It looked for a moment like she was going to kiss him, but she let out a little moan and pulled away from him instead, walking over to a bookshelf with her back turned to him. Harry heard a rustling from up front, and he winced. Damn librarians!  
  
He got to his feet and followed Ginny, cornering her against a shelf full of Potion books. She was just grabbing a volume when she turned and let out a tiny squeal before he clapped a hand over her mouth, looking to the side nervously.  
  
"Pipe down! Do you want to get caught?" he whispered roughly, removing his hand.  
  
She looked up at him incredulously. "Caught doing what?" she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
Harry looked down at her, hands itching to reach back and let her hair fly freely down her back. He stepped closer to her, the fronts of their robes touching, and leaned down. Sliding his hands up her arms, he heard her breath catch as he caught her mouth in his, and he smiled.  
  
She didn't even put up a fight. Her hands tangled in the perpetually messy hair at the nape of his neck, sending shivers down his spine every time her skin brushed his. He cupped her cheek in one hand as the other reached back to the neat bun and pulled on it. Her hair fell fast and free around her shoulders, and he ran his fingers through it as he kissed her hard, making up for every time in the past month he had wanted to kiss her but couldn't.  
  
It was freedom for him; he finally felt able to fully relax. Not even Ron and Hermione could make him feel so...whole. He skimmed his hand down her back, resting his fingers at the small of her back as his other hand wound itself in her curls. The library disappeared from his mind, and all he knew-all he wanted to know-was the girl in his arms who kissing him back with a fever he had missed for almost two months.  
  
"Miss Weasley!"  
  
Ginny gasped and jumped in his arms, her front teeth accidentally cutting the inside of his bottom lip. He hissed in pain and broke away from her, holding a hand up to his lip. She had both hands over her mouth, eyes wide with shock as Madam Pince called for her once again and only two bookshelves away. "Miss Weasley! Mr. Potter!"  
  
"Yes...Yes, Madam Pince?" Ginny choked out, gazing at Harry in amazement. He met her gaze steadily, wiping a droplet of blood from his lips.  
  
"I was just checking to make sure everything was all right back here. I thought I heard a strange noise," the librarian replied, and Harry could hear her footsteps fading from their area.  
  
Ginny bit her lip nervously as they stared at each other from opposite sides of an aisle. Harry took a step towards her. "Gin, I've missed you," he said, reaching out to take her hand.  
  
Her mouth trembled, and he saw the conflict within her dark stare. "I've missed you too, Harry. But I don't know if I can do this," she whispered, taking her hand from his grasp.  
  
"Give me another chance. I've been an absolute prat. I want to make it up to you, Ginny," he pleaded.  
  
She hesitated for a moment, and he thought he had won her over. Hope rose within him, and he reached out to her again. "Ginny, please-"  
  
She pulled away, tears threatening to spill from her brown eyes. "No, Harry. I can't do this again. I don't want to hurt anymore," she cried softly, turning away from him.  
  
He stood in silence as she grabbed her bag and raced from the library. His heart stopped beating, it seemed, and he was staring at the bookshelf blankly for many a minute.  
  
I don't want to hurt anymore...  
  
He had to show her. He wouldn't hurt her. He wouldn't.  
  
~*~  
  
"Four days until holiday, four days until holiday, four days..."  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
Ginny cringed, stopped her muttering, and looked up from her Potions notes to her brother, eyebrow raised at the almost despondent look on his face. He hadn't looked well since breakfast, when an unfamiliar owl had delivered a note addressed to him, and he'd looked quite ill in the common room right now. She rolled from her stomach to her back and got to her feet, careful not to meet Harry's eyes. "What?"  
  
Ron shifted nervously, looking pale in the firelight. "Well, Mum's sent a note, and-"  
  
"She doesn't want me to come home for the holiday, does she? I wrote and told her I needed to stay here..." she trailed off as Ron got green around the edges. "Ron, are you all right?" she asked curiously.  
  
Harry let out a snicker from his chair by the hearth, and Ron shot him a quelling glare. Hermione giggled, looking prettily red in the face, and nodded encouragingly at her stuttering boyfriend. Ron swallowed, and turned back to his baffled sister. "No, Gin. It seems that Hermione's parents would like her to come home for a bit of the holiday, and..." He sighed. "Well, Mum got it in her head to let me go home with her."  
  
Harry couldn't smother his laughter any longer, and soon he was holding his sides and gasping for breath. Hermione smacked his arm, blushing harder. "Well, there's no need to be immature about this! It was a nice invitation," she scolded him, barely concealing her pleased smile.  
  
Ginny gazed at her brother, smiling slightly. "That's lovely, Ron. I don't mind being here alone. I'll probably get more work done," she joked weakly, heart sinking as she spoke. It was wonderful for Ron, but with Colin, Neville and Luna all leaving for home, she would be quite alone on Christmas. The last time that had happened was Ron's first year of Hogwarts, when she was the only child at home. She had been quite lonely without anyone to talk to, and it seemed it was going to happen again.  
  
She sighed inaudibly, and plopped down on the common room floor once more. "When will you three be leaving?" she asked, looking at Ron expectantly. The loneliness should be something she was used to by now; it would pass in time, like it always did.  
  
Ron ducked his head, looking at the still mirthful Harry. "Well, see, the thing is..."  
  
"I'm not going with them, Ginny. I have my own work to do, and no one likes a third wheel, anyway," Harry wheezed out, mastering his laughter as quickly as he could.  
  
Hermione frowned slightly at him. "Harry, you wouldn't be a third wheel," she admonished.  
  
Ginny could scarcely breathe as she watched Harry and Hermione talk quietly, feeling Ron's gaze on her.  
  
Harry was going to be here.  
  
Alone.  
  
With her.  
  
She was absolutely petrified of the thought. What was he trying to do to her? Of course, he wanted Ron and Hermione to have a few private days, what with the war and such, but he could go to The Burrow and see Fred and George! Why was he staying here?  
  
It was too late for her to go home now; she didn't want to go anyway. She would just have to deal with his presence as best as possible, avoid him when needed, and it would be a fine holiday.  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
Ron's quiet voice brought her out of her shock-induced haze, and she looked up at him. He looked worried for her, like all her brothers did whenever they saw her. It annoyed her, and she forced a cheerful smile at him. "Well! I won't be completely alone, then. You and Hermione will be gone for how long?"  
  
"Oh, only for a few days; four or five at the most. Your mother's been most kind; she's invited my parents to Christmas Eve dinner at The Burrow!" Hermione exclaimed, smiling happily at Ron. He returned the grin, and with a final pat on Ginny's shoulder, he went back over to his two friends.  
  
She watched them laugh and talk together for a moment, the loneliness hitting her full-force. She would have no one; it was just Ginny now.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
She craned her neck slightly as a cheerful fourth-year girl came towards her, smiling shyly. "You're Ginny, right?"  
  
Ginny nodded, bemused. The trio by the hearth looked over in interest. The girl grinned a bit wider, and tossed her long blonde hair over her shoulder. "My friends and I have wanted to tell you that we heard what Draco Malfoy said to you and what you said back a couple weeks ago, and we think that what you said was really great! He was just a git, and you took care of him. We really admire you for that," she said in a rush, blushing furiously as she finished.  
  
Ginny stared at the younger girl in amazement for a moment, completely floored. She glanced towards the trio and saw Ron and Harry looking displeased for some reason, and Hermione smiling warmly at her. She grinned, and looked back at the shy girl in front of her. "Thank you," she said. "I really appreciate that right now."  
  
The girl smiled widely, and scurried off to her friends again. Ginny smiled lightly, feeling a bit happier than she had a moment ago. The feeling didn't leave her.  
  
Until both Harry and Ron stomped over, looking violent.  
  
"What did Malfoy say to you, Ginny?" Ron asked darkly.  
  
She pursed her lips, annoyance washing over her. She hated it when people thought that she needed to be protected. "Oh, something about how I was Harry's whore and how he was having threesomes with me and Cho," she said airily, standing up to face them.  
  
They were practically black in the face with anger, fists clenched at their sides. She felt quite small next to their six-foot frames, but straightened up as tall as she could, trying to be as formidable as possible. Ron growled and Harry shot a look at Ginny. "Why didn't you tell us?" he ground out, looking ready to murder.  
  
She crossed her arms over her chest, glaring at them both, more so at Harry. "Because you don't need to know what happens to me at all times," she shot back. "You two are certainly not my keepers!"  
  
The common room was growing quieter as their voices grew louder, and Hermione made her way over, putting a placating arm on both Ron and Harry's shoulders. "Don't be ridiculous, boys," she hissed.  
  
Ron ignored her, as did Harry. "We should know anything that bastard says to you," Ron snarled. "Especially when it's about you!"  
  
"You have no right to know anything that's going on in my life, Ronald Weasley! And, neither do you, for that matter, Harry!" she exclaimed, reaching down to gather her books and notes. "Both of you can just leave me alone until you've come to your senses!"  
  
She turned sharply and headed for the stairs to the girls' dormitory, but a hand on her elbow stopped her. Harry pulled her back around to face him and Ron, the hate still in his green eyes. "We just want to look out for you, Ginny," he said voice thick with anger.  
  
Drawing herself up, she pulled away from him and glared at them both. "I do not need a protector, thank you very much! Both of you can sod off! Now!"  
  
With that, she raced up the stairs in as dignified of a manner as possible, leaving Harry and Ron in her wake.  
  
Fine holiday, indeed.  
  
~*~  
  
She was lying in her bed with the covers over her head and the curtains drawn the next morning, basking in the Sunday ahead of her, when the door opened and shut quickly, and someone threw the curtains open. "Ginny, wake up," Hermione called, tugging on the covers.  
  
Ginny groaned, and sat up abruptly, blinking the sun from her eyes. "You yelled?" she quipped grumpily, shivering as the air in the room hit her with a chilly vengeance. It was much warmer under the blankets.  
  
Hermione sat down on the edge of her younger friend's bed, worry written in her face. "Don't hide in here anymore. Ron and Harry want to talk to you. They've been waiting for almost two hours for you to come down to the common room," she pleaded.  
  
Ginny huffed, reaching under her pillow for a ribbon to tie back her hair with. She was still burning from their treatment of her last night, and she wasn't ready to forgive Ron and Harry for it. "They can wait longer; they've obviously got no one better to patronize," she muttered venomously.  
  
"From what I coaxed out of Neville, Harry and Ron have been dreaming up schemes to murder Malfoy all night, and are very ready to act upon them," Hermione warned.  
  
"Good. One less Death Eater to kill later."  
  
"Ginny, don't be ridiculous! If they decide to hurt Malfoy, they'll be expelled, have their wands snapped, and then who will defeat Voldemort?" Hermione snapped, looking like she was at the end of her rope. Ginny supposed the brown-haired girl had been trying to convince Harry and Ron not to take any action against the blond Slytherin, and she had a moment of pity for her friend. Having Ron and Harry as best friends would drive even a saint to violence.  
  
Sighing, Ginny finished tying back her hair. "I don't want to talk to them, Hermione. They were bloody gits last night, and don't you deny it!"  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes, smiling slightly. "I can't deny it; you're quite right. But you can't be angry at them forever."  
  
"Watch me," Ginny muttered, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
"They're worried about you, Ginny. They don't want you to get hurt by Malfoy, or anyone else who might try to get at them through you," Hermione said softly.  
  
"I don't need to be looked out for, Hermione! I'm perfectly capable of defending myself. I'm not little anymore. I don't want to be treated like I'm little," Ginny replied unhappily.  
  
The two girls sat in silence for a moment before Hermione coughed pointedly. "Harry seems especially upset," she commented quietly.  
  
Ginny's heart sped up unconsciously. "Is he? Imagine that," she said in as neutral a tone as possible.  
  
Hermione scrutinized her friend carefully. "I think he likes you, Ginny. I mean, likes you."  
  
"He's a bit late for that, right?" Ginny joked lightly, trying not to blush.  
  
"Is he?"  
  
Ginny gaped slightly at Hermione. "What do you mean?"  
  
Hermione heaved an impatient sigh. "You still like him that way, don't you? I know you said you didn't last year, but I'm not blind," she stated matter-of-factly, flicking a bit of lint from her robes.  
  
Ginny wanted to cry. Of course she still liked him that way! She was in love with the poor boy, for Merlin's sake! Ever since the incident in the library, she had been struggling not to run back into his arms. It had to be different this time; she didn't want to be hurt by him anymore, and he had to understand what she wanted.  
  
"It doesn't matter if I do, Hermione. I'd rather not talk about it," she replied softly, looking down at her maroon bedcover.  
  
Hermione sighed, and touched Ginny's shoulder lightly. "Just let them apologize, please. They really want to," she said gently, giving Ginny's shoulder a squeeze before going to the door and leaving her alone in the room.  
  
Ginny stretched her arms over her head, frowning at herself. They had better have a good apology in store for her, or this holiday would be very unpleasant for both of those bloody boys. She had been working on her Bat- Bogey Hex quite a bit lately, and was ready to try it out on a human subject. Grinning at the thought of Ron with wings flapping on his face, she climbed out of bed and started towards the loo. As she passed the door to the corridor, she saw a folded piece of parchment on the floor near the crack of the door. Curious, she picked it up and saw her name scrawled across the front in a familiar hand. Raising an eyebrow, she opened the note.  
  
Meet me in the Room of Requirement tomorrow night at seven.  
  
H.  
  
Well! He wanted to talk? Her heart fluttered, and she smiled slightly. Maybe her Bat-Bogey Hex could wait a day for Harry. There was always Ron to try today.  
  
A/N: Ha! Thought Harry was going to get his way in the library, didn't you? Ha! Please read and review! :P  
  
Harry Potter is not mine, as usual. If it were, I wouldn't be here, would I?  
  
Many thanks and hugs to Anne! ^^ 


	5. Five

Harry stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, pacing the Room of Requirement in frustration. It was unbearably warm in the room; he had already stripped off his robes as the sweat started to bead his forehead. His eyes glanced towards the wooden clock near the door as he made another pass around the couch. 7:05.   
  
What was she playing at? Was this her form of rejection to his note?   
  
He was not in a flexible mood. Maybe some other time he would have let her have her way and actually enjoyed not worrying about their relationship. It had been his attitude for the most part for the better part of four months: let Ginny control the relationship; she had his best interests at heart.   
  
After the chilly attitude he'd been receiving from her, he was sick of their state of their relationship.   
  
The pacing increased as his frustration grew. She wasn't a demanding girl; he knew it and appreciated it. But she wanted a lot from him, or at least a lot from his point of view. In the summer she had caught him at a vulnerable time, and he had been able to voice some of his fears to her. Now that he was back at Hogwarts, surrounded by strangers, he couldn't just dig up his feelings and spill them to her. She had to understand that he couldn't just say things like she wanted him to.   
  
That wasn't to say he couldn't tell her anything; it just took him a while to feel comfortable enough with himself to say the really tough things.   
  
To make matters worse, it was Christmas.   
  
Harry had really begun to hate Christmas these past few years.   
  
Ever since he had woken up this morning to the sounds of his roommates' furious packing as they prepared to head off for the holiday, all he had been able to think about was how Sirius wasn't here to spend Christmas with everyone, and how it was his fault.   
  
Whenever he closed his eyes, he saw Sirius' face, framed by the shaggy black hair and full of cheer. Last Christmas had been Sirius' happiest holiday in a long time, and he had enjoyed it to the fullest. How was he to know that in less than a year he would be chasing after Harry to his death?   
  
Harry shuddered, quickening his pace. 7:10. Come on, Ginny. Hurry up before I remember too much...   
  
Memories of Christmases with the Dursleys set upon him, and he cringed, clenching his fists so hard that his nails cut into his palms. He brought his palms to his face and winced as blood began to well at the crescent- shaped cuts.   
  
Dudley smirking as he unwrapped the first in a never-ending line of bicycles...   
  
The piece of moldy bread he had received when he was seven...   
  
The longing for his parents he felt every time Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia simpered over their son after they came home from Mass.   
  
Curling up in his cupboard after the endless day, silent tears of grief streaming down his young face...   
  
He let the blood collect in his palms, shuddering violently with the pain of his unwanted memories. His pacing halted, and he stood in the middle of the room, staring at his hands and feeling oddly cold in the warmth of the nearby hearth.   
  
Lost inside himself, he didn't even hear the creak of the door opening. He didn't see Ginny slip inside, an impassive look upon her face.   
  
He did hear her gasp quietly when her eyes found him. It startled him, and he looked up from the cuts on his hands to the pale girl standing only a few feet away from him. Silently thanking Merlin that he wasn't bawling like a baby, he put his arms at his sides and met her wide gaze. "You're late," he said tonelessly.   
  
She gulped, the indifference gone from her face. "I'm sorry," she whispered, not moving from her spot.   
  
A frown crossed his face, and he struggled to keep the poisonous hate he felt for himself from surging over into his face. "So am I, Ginny. I've been sorry for a long time."   
  
She remained mute, staring at him. He took a step towards her. "You won't let me talk to you. I can't be near you anymore. You keep me at a distance. I'm sorry for all of this. But it isn't entirely my fault," he ground out, forcing the words from his mouth. "You can't expect me to be able to give you everything you want. It's not in me, Ginny."   
  
He looked at her, expecting her to speak up. She was silent under his gaze, and it infuriated him. Crossing the distance to her in less than two strides, he grasped her wrists as gently as he could, trying not to shake her out of silence. "I can't be what you want! I'm a murderer; I'm cursed! I can't tell you what I'm feeling. It's not who I am!" he exclaimed wildly, not understanding why he was saying these things to her. He tightened his grip on her. He wasn't expecting her to reply; he was ready to let go of her and stalk away. Then, he felt a light touch on his arm. Her fingertips made small circles on his skin, as she looked up to his gaze, eyes sad and repentant. "Harry, it is in you. I've seen it," she said softly.   
  
Already he was overwhelmed by the feelings he was expressing; it was overload for his brain. He released her, turning his back to her, and stared into the leaping flames of the fireplace. "I just want another chance, Gin. I know that I'm not what you thought I was, but you're exactly what I want. Please give me another chance."   
  
Reaching out to him, she stepped towards him. Her hand closed on his elbow, and he turned back to her. She was smiling slightly up at him. "I think I've been the prat, haven't I?" she asked in a whisper, reaching up with her free hand to brush his fringe from his hooded eyes. Her fingers brushed his scar and warmth shot through his veins. "I'm so sorry, Harry. I've been confused, and I thought you just didn't care enough about me to tell me anything, you know?"   
  
She took a deep breath, steadying herself on his elbow as he listened intently, confusion filling him. What was she saying? "I haven't told you anything, Ginny," he protested weakly.   
  
Shaking her head, she ran her fingers down the line of his jaw. "You've said enough for you, Harry. I can't ask for more if you can't give it right now, right?"   
  
They stood in silence for a while, letting the sound of crackling wood soothe them. The fingers on his elbow traced the thin scar left by Wormtail during the Third Task, and he shivered.   
  
"You're unhappy."   
  
He jumped slightly at the words. How could she read him so easily? Sirius' face coupled with a shiny red bicycle appeared in his mind, and he shut his eyes tightly against the images.   
  
"Nothing more than usual."   
  
She kept one hand on his elbow as the other fell away to her side. "It's almost Christmas, you know," she commented gently.   
  
His body tensed. "Ginny, please stop."   
  
Her hand left his elbow and he cursed himself brutally, scrambling to recover, his eyes still closed against Sirius' empty gaze. "Don't leave. I'm sorry."   
  
"Stop saying you're sorry, Harry. I'm not leaving you," was the soft reply. "I'll stay until you want to go."   
  
His stomach clenched mercilessly. She wasn't going to leave him.   
  
But she would in the end.   
  
They were all leaving because of him.   
  
Because of him, his parents were dead.   
  
Because of him, Cedric was dead.   
  
Because of him, Sirius was dead.   
  
He began to shudder uncontrollably, water stinging behind his eyelids. "Ginny," he rasped.   
  
"I'm right here, Harry. I won't leave you."   
  
His gaze was blurry as he opened his eyes to look at her. She was standing right in front of him, giving him a tiny smile.   
  
Something inside him broke.   
  
He didn't know how it happened; whether he had moved into her arms or she had reached out to him was a mystery of no importance. All he knew was one minute he was gazing at her and the next his face was buried in the slope of her neck, and her arms were around his back. She rocked him as he shuddered and cursed in a hoarse voice, feeling a wetness passing from his eyes to her skin. He didn't understand what she was whispering to him; it was like a foreign language, words he had never heard spoken to him in his life. Her voice lulled him, and as his sobs passed, he blacked out into a blissful void of solitude and Ginny's soft voice. When he awoke to the chimes of eleven later that night, the room was swathed in shadow. His head was pillowed on Ginny's lap, and he could feel her fingers sifting through his hair gently. He blinked, eyes itching like he had shed tears before sleeping, and looked up to her profile, illuminated by the dying embers of the fire. She looked happier than she had in weeks, and his heart felt lighter as he watched her quietly. He'd blocked out the last hours; he had been delusional. What had he said?   
  
He shifted his head on her lap slightly, causing her to look down at his face. When she saw his eyes were open, she smiled softly at him. "Hello," she murmured.   
  
He had to smile back. "You let the fire die."   
  
She shrugged and traced the lines of his face with one hand as the other continued running through his hair. "I was much too comfortable to move."   
  
He couldn't remember if he had actually cried; he had barely ever cried in his life. Shame flushed his face, and he started to sit up. "Ginny, I'm--- "   
  
Her hand pushed gently on his shoulder, making him lie back down. She shook her head, a smile playing at her lips. "It's all right, Harry. You don't need to say anything. I understand," she said gently, leaning down to kiss the corner of his mouth.   
  
His skin burned at her light touch, and he gave her a half-smile. She did understand. He could say anything to her and she would know what he meant. She would never bring up his spells of grief, but she knew why he'd said some of the things he had. With all the things she did for him, what was her reward? What did he do for her?   
  
Her hair was pulled back into its usual ponytail, red and copper hues shooting through it as the embers in the hearth burned away. He reached up to the nape of her neck and pulled the ribbon from her hair in a quick motion, sending the curls tumbling around her face. His lips creased into a small smile as he felt the silk-like strands slip through his fingers. A light laugh, lower then her usual timbre, escaped her mouth. Quickly, he pulled her face down to his, lifting his other hand to cup her cheek, and kissed her mouth, opening up to her almost immediately as she yielded to him, tangling both her hands in his mussed hair. Heat shot through him as she opened her mouth to him, and he felt a blinding need to devour her; he had missed her a great deal.   
  
His hand left her cheek and skimmed down her spine, feeling the curve as she bent over his face. She was tense; he realized somewhere in his dazed mind that she must be having a hard time keeping her back bent like this. Breaking reluctantly from her mouth, he shifted off her lap, sitting up to meet her questioning gaze as she straightened her back. He smiled ruefully. "I thought your back might hurt," he muttered with a blush, thankful for the dark.   
  
She smiled at him, and moved down to sit right next to him. He reached over and pulled her legs across his knees, settling her on his thighs. Her cheek rested on his chest as she wrapped her arms around his back, and he buried his face in her hair, letting the warmth of her body seep into his cold bones.   
  
"Are we all right, Ginny?" he asked, voice muffled by her hair.   
  
He felt her nod under him. "We're all right, Harry."   
  
The memory of his breakdown was beginning to haunt him. All he remembered was the overwhelming pain he had felt, and that she had been there to see it. "What did I do?" he whispered, not sure if she would understand his meaning.   
  
She shifted her head and looked up at him, a small, reassuring smile on her lips. "Nothing you didn't need to do. It's all right, Harry. I won't leave," she whispered before kissing him softly, bringing him back to her from his tortured mind.   
  
~*~   
  
It was odd, being alone in the castle with Harry; she was free to touch him or look at him as much as she pleased, providing the professors weren't close by. The only time she saw them was at meals, so they weren't a difficulty.   
  
Now, the grins Ginny had caught from Professor Lupin annoyed her, especially when she saw Harry smile back; she had to wonder if they were smiling about her.   
  
Only ten students had stayed at the school for the holidays; she and Harry were the only Gryffindors. They had the run of the tower and they took advantage of it. Somehow she had persuaded Harry that there was no sense in sleeping in separate dormitories when they were the only ones in the tower, so they had transfigured the chairs by the hearth into makeshift beds. They didn't want to attempt sleeping in the dormitories together; who knew how those alarms worked. She was still baffled about how Harry got into her room that night in September.   
  
And even though she and Harry went to sleep in different beds, somehow one always ended up in the other's bed.   
  
Not in a bad way, of course. It was just comfort; he was feeling especially low because of the holiday, and her memories of the Chamber were creeping upon her like they always did at this time of year. Having his arm around her waist grounded her, even in the depths of her dreams.   
  
And she didn't mind waking up with him next to her in the morning either.   
  
She shifted in his arms as the sunlight streamed through one of the windows in the common room. A hand touched her hair, sending a ribbon of warmth through her body. She was filled with a lethargic sense of happiness as his hand tightened on her waist; this feeling they had couldn't be wrong when she felt so light, so free. She didn't ever want to let him leave her arms again.   
  
A yawn stretched her mouth as she blinked her eyes open, leaning back against his chest as a low chuckle escaped his mouth. "Happy Christmas, Ginny," he said cheerfully; almost too cheerfully.   
  
She rested the back of her head on his shoulder, smiling sleepily as his hand sneaked across to the flat of her stomach. His other hand tangled in her hair. She slipped her hand over the one at her waist. "Happy Christmas, Harry."   
  
They were still as minutes passed, each trying to escape the chill of their own minds. Ginny shivered involuntarily and he pulled her closer to his warmth. A comfortable silence reigned. She could feel the tension rise within him as life rushed back from sleep; what did he remember on these empty mornings?   
  
He made a sudden shift behind her, slipping his hands from her body and sitting up. She rolled over to her other side, looking up at him as he sat on the edge of the bed, looking pale in the brilliant sunshine. "We should open our gifts, right?" he asked nonchalantly.   
  
She sighed inaudibly, wrapping a blanket over her nightdress as she sat up across from him. "All right, Harry," she replied softly, smiling weakly.   
  
He shot her a quick grin and walked over to the hearth, where two small piles of wrapped boxes sat glittering in the sun. She watched him from her bed quietly, seeing the restraint in his movements. It was much like the restraint he had in his emotions. It hurt her to see it; that night in the Room of Requirement, she had finally understood what kinds of torture he had been put through his whole life and how they haunted him now. His guilt over Sirius' death was only the most recent hurt.   
  
It made her feel very young to sit next to him during this time. He had gone through so much in his early years; she had to wonder how old he felt when he was alone in the dark, vulnerable to nightmares and memories.   
  
Maybe that was part of why he sought her in the night.   
  
He needed to forget.   
  
"Gin?"   
  
She looked up at his gaze with a start, brought from her own internal ruminations with his curious voice. He was holding a box out to her, smiling softly. "Are you feeling all right, Ginny?" he asked gently, suppressing a yawn and running a hand through his hair.   
  
Are you, Harry?   
  
She wanted to ask so badly; she wanted to know what he was thinking, feeling, wishing on this Christmas Day. But it wasn't right to push him today. He would tell her; she knew he would.   
  
She just didn't want him to wait.   
  
"I'm feeling good, Harry," she replied, avoiding the word "fine" as best as she could. "What have you got there?"   
  
He grinned. "It's for you from Hermione and Ron. And I don't think it's a book."   
  
Ginny slid off the bed onto her feet and walked over to him, taking the small box in surprise. "Not a book?" she echoed, settling down next to him on the hearthrug.   
  
He put it in her hands and reached one of his gifts. "Maybe Ron has a bit of sway with her after all. It's too light to be a book," he teased, knocking her lightly with his shoulder.   
  
She stuck out her tongue at him.   
  
"Maybe it's one of those awful homework planners from last year," he egged, looking appreciatively at the Chudley Cannons souvenirs from Ron.   
  
She tossed wrapping paper at him, hitting him square on the chest. "The planner was a thoughtful gift. It helped me greatly," she said primly.   
  
He smirked. "I always thought you had an affinity for singing parchments."   
  
She blushed, glaring at him as she lifted the lid of the small box. "Shove it, Potter. We're not going to talk about that," she warned, looking down at the contents of the box. She fell silent.   
  
A small Celtic charm rested in the cushion of the box, set on a thin silver chain. The charm was quite intricate, but she could make out the outlines of a heart within the knots. She smiled happily, holding it out for Harry to see. "Isn't that lovely? Ron's finally learned how to buy thoughtful gifts. Thank Merlin for Hermione," she commented wryly, looking up to see his reaction to the gift.   
  
A mysterious smile played at his lips and he leaned over to look at the necklace more closely, his forehead brushing against her cheek. "It's very nice, Ginny. They did well," he murmured.   
  
She grinned and kissed his forehead lightly. "I thought so."   
  
He pulled back to continue opening gifts, and they managed to finish without any major distractions. It was almost an hour later before she and Harry were heading down to the Great Hall for a bit of breakfast. They were the only ones in there at the time, so they grabbed a few slices of toast and headed outside.   
  
It was bitterly cold, even with the sun shining as brightly as it was. The snow-blanketed grounds blinded them momentarily as they walked towards the frozen lake in silence, feet crunching the snow underneath. She wanted to reach out and grasp his hand, but he had stuffed his hands in the pockets of his robes. The look on his face was pensive and she nudged him gently, wanting to know what he was thinking of. "What's on your mind?" she asked.   
  
He was silent for a moment as they continued walking. Then he stopped abruptly, gazing out onto the grounds distantly. "They must be at Mass by now," he muttered.   
  
She looked at him curiously. "Who?"   
  
"The Dursleys."   
  
Her eyebrows shot up at his voluntary mention of his so-called family. What in the world was he thinking about?   
  
He cast a glance towards her, and she could see the hate simmering in his eyes. "Do you know what Mass is?" he asked.   
  
She nodded. "We just learned about it in Muggle Studies. Why are you thinking of it?"   
  
A frown creased his face. "They went to Mass every Christmas, just for show. It was the only time other than Easter that they would enter the church. I was always locked in the cupboard when they left. I would hear them smirking over Dudley like the overly proud parents they were. They would gossip about the neighbors over their Christmas dinner. It was one of the most disgusting things I ever heard," he said bitterly, looking off towards Hagrid's empty hut. The groundskeeper had left earlier in the month on a task for Dumbledore.   
  
Ginny kept her silence, waiting for the inevitable words. She had never hated the Dursleys more than she did in that moment.   
  
"I envied it."   
  
There it was; his pain and grief succinctly expressed in those three words. She wanted to hold him, but he was hunched over, his back to her eyes.   
  
"I would have given anything to be able to have parents to praise me, even though I wasn't worth the praise. I just wanted a mum to laud me to her friends before the service, and a dad to clap me on the back and brace me up when the preacher went on too long. I didn't want to go to Mass itself; I liked the idea of it."   
  
His voice was low, edged with rough pain. "But bloody Dudley, who never did a day's work in his life, was blessed with parents to smother him and adore his every move. I'm not saying I deserve a real family, but I can't understand why Dudley had to be related to me. Every Christmas I heard taunts about my 'drunken dad' and my 'pathetic mum,' and he took the greatest pleasure in wounding me."   
  
She was hurting so much her head felt light. Without a thought, she reached out to touch his shoulder. He flinched at the contact, but she kept her hand there. "Harry..." she whispered, wishing above all she could bring his parents back to him.   
  
There was a moment of agonized silence. A shudder rippled through him. "Sirius was all I had," he said brokenly.   
  
It was a sucker-punch to the stomach, and tears filled her eyes. "I wish I could give you a real family," she said desperately, dropping her hand from him and hugging herself. "If anyone deserves a family, it's you."   
  
He turned to face her suddenly, features twisted with dark pain. "I wish I could be what you want me to be, Ginny. You deserve much more than I can give," he said, breathing shallowly.   
  
Her heart clenched and she went to him, wrapping her arms around him tightly. "Don't say that, Harry. You're everything I want," she breathed, feeling his arms come up around her waist.   
  
His cheek rested against her temple as he crushed her into his embrace. "I don't want to remember, Ginny. I want to forget all of it," he murmured roughly, lips brushing her skin lightly.   
  
She took a few deep breaths to help calm her erratic heart, running her hands up and down his back. What was he saying to her? What did he mean? She shivered. She could only imagine...   
  
Abruptly, he stiffened. "Damnit, we're so out in the open," he muttered, cursing viciously under his breath as he pulled away.   
  
Ginny frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. "There are less then ten students in the castle, Harry. Stop worrying and don't be afraid for me," she exclaimed unthinkingly, wincing as his eyes widened at her outburst. There went her holiday.   
  
Harry looked at her for a moment and shrugged, lifting his hands helplessly. "I can't help it. I'm not used to this." He reddened as he spoke.   
  
She gazed at him in surprise. He hadn't closed off at her accusation; he had actually answered her clearly. Was this a sign of his willingness to talk? "I know, Harry. Maybe you will get used to it, someday," she replied softly.   
  
They stood together in the chill for a little while, looking over and assuring one another silently. Then, he held out his hand to her. She smiled and took it, falling into step with him as they walked back up to the castle.   
  
~*~   
  
"You look well this evening, Harry." Harry grinned at Professor Lupin from across the table as he spooned potatoes onto his plate at supper time. The Christmas supper was always splendid at Hogwarts; he liked having the feeling of intimacy with the professors during the quiet holiday.   
  
Except for Snape, whom he hated as much as ever. But he wouldn't let the bloody Potions Master ruin his holiday; his thoughts were morbid enough without having Snape running around in them.   
  
He felt a hand squeeze his knee underneath the table, and he shot a glance at Ginny. She was smiling cheerfully at him as steady as ever. Only he knew the horrors of her dreams.   
  
Pushing that thought from his mind, he looked back at Lupin. "It's been a good day, sir," he said neutrally, watching in amusement as Lupin struggled not to burst out laughing. From the other end of the table, Snape glanced coldly at Harry. Harry didn't permit himself to glare back; it was Christmas, and he was alone with Ginny. There was no need to spoil his holiday.   
  
At the head of the table, Dumbledore smiled genially. "Tuck in, friends! The elves have outdone themselves this year."   
  
Ginny sighed softly. "Thank Merlin Hermione wasn't here to hear that."   
  
"She might think of knitting those bloody hats again if she had," Harry muttered, grinning as she giggled in reply.   
  
The ring box in the pocket of his robes shifted, and he bit the inside of his lip anxiously. Dumbledore had given it to him just last week, and he had had time to look at it. It was perfect for Ginny. He was going to give it to her right after supper; what would she think? He was barking mad...   
  
Shaking his head, he pushed away his doubts. It was the right thing to do. He wanted to do it.   
  
Time dwindled on; the students trickled away as the evening wore on. Soon it was only Harry, Ginny, and the professors at the small table. Lupin was watching him with raised eyebrows. Harry wondered whether he knew of the ring Harry now had. He looked almost knowingly between him and an oblivious Ginny, who was chatting with her Muggle Studies professor, and Harry had to grin.   
  
Harry very much wanted to leave and be alone with Ginny. The way her hair was strewn around her shoulders was driving him to distraction. He slipped his hand under the table discreetly, and began running his hand up and down the side of her thigh. Her mouth made a tiny "o" of surprise, and she shot him a look. He raised an eyebrow in reply, trying to suppress his wicked smile.   
  
After a moment she stood gracefully from her seat, her composure regained. "Thank you all for a lovely dinner. Happy Christmas," she said politely, flashing a smile at Lupin and Dumbledore.   
  
Dumbledore nodded. "Happy Christmas, Miss Weasley," he replied kindly, a knowing twinkle in his blue eyes.   
  
She gave a little wave and exited, her robes trailing alluringly behind her. Harry smirked to himself and turned to Lupin. "Having a good holiday, Professor?"   
  
Lupin's eyes sparkled. "You look just like James right now, Harry. That poor girl won't know what hit her," he muttered out of the corner of his mouth while nodding politely. "A very good holiday, yes. Thank you for asking, Mr. Potter."   
  
Harry's smile widened. "That's what I was hoping," he replied smoothly, answering both statements with the one sentence.   
  
Making his farewells to the teachers, Harry left the Great Hall in high spirits, headed for the common room as quickly as he could. He slipped a hand into his pocket, touching the box with his fingers in an act of support.   
  
When he entered, he saw Ginny standing by the hearth, arms crossed over her chest. "What the bloody hell do you think you were trying to do to me in there, Harry? In front of all the teachers?" she asked immediately, a small smile of pleasure playing at her lips.   
  
He crossed to her swiftly and pulled her face up to his for a brief kiss. "I doubt they noticed a thing; too much Butterbeer," he muttered when he released her, and set her down on his favorite chair. "Let me talk for a minute, all right?"   
  
She nodded, completely bewildered. He stood in front of her without moving for a moment, clutching the box in his pocket. "I have a gift for you, Ginny," he began slowly, heart pounding nervously.   
  
She cocked her head to one side, looking curious. "All right, Harry."   
  
He was hoping that something mood-worthy and suave would pop into his head when he was ready to give it to her, but nothing came. Mouth dry, he pulled the small box out slowly and held it out to her in his palm. "I'm not sure if you'll like it," he muttered, looking down at his shoes out of nervous habit.   
  
"Hush, Harry. Oh my," she breathed, reaching out shakily to grasp the box. He felt the weight leave his hand and he braved a glance at her face. She was wide-eyed and gaping in shock, holding it in her palm and staring at it in wonder. His brow furrowed in confusion; was that how girls opened ring boxes?   
  
"Ginny---"   
  
She hushed him with a wave of her free hand. Her fingers lifted the lid of the little black box, and Harry held his breath unconsciously. Ginny gasped and pulled the ring from its holder, lifting it up to her eyes in incredulity. "Harry, this is beautiful," she whispered.   
  
He let out his breath and leaned in closer to look at the design with her. The band was gold, and in the center was a heart-shaped emerald with a crown of gold engraved above it. Two hands of gold were holding the heart. It was simple, elegant, and beautiful. He could admire the choice by his father; it was perfect.   
  
Ginny met his gaze with watery brown eyes. "Was this your mother's?" she asked softly.   
  
He nodded. She took a deep breath and smiled tremulously. "Oh, Harry. I love it. Thank you so much," she murmured, reaching out to brush the fringe from his forehead.   
  
Harry smiled gently at her teary face, pulling something else from his pocket. "I know you can't wear it on your hand quite yet, but I ordered a chain for you to wear it on," he said, holding out a thin gold chain to her.   
  
She returned his smile, took the chain and pocketed it. "I want to wear it right now, if that's all right," she whispered, slipping the band onto her left ring finger and leaning up to kiss his mouth. "This is wonderful, Harry."   
  
He had to disagree as he wrapped his arms around her, falling into the chair on top of her, and tangled his hands in her hair. This was wonderful.   
  
His body was flip-flopping between hot and cold as she slipped her hands underneath his robes, tracing the lines of his muscles through the Weasley jumper he had received that morning. Struggling to control his aching limbs, he was fighting a losing battle. Ginny wasn't helping his self- restraint at all; her nimble fingers were already pushing the robes off his shoulders, searching for the hem of his sweater. Running his hand down her side as he kissed her, he brushed against the side of her breast and something electric and dangerous shot through him.   
  
Screaming for logic to set in, his mind was reeling. He couldn't do this with her yet; they had barely had any sort of relationship, she was only fifteen! Besides those facts, he didn't want to do this if he didn't love her. He cared a great deal for her, certainly, but he didn't understand what love was. How could he feel something he didn't understand?   
  
"Ginny," he gasped as he made himself break away from her, meeting her drugged brown eyes. "Ginny, we can't do this."   
  
Her brow furrowed and he could see the confusion on her face. Her hands tightened on his waist. "What do you mean?" she whispered.   
  
Bloody hell. He did not want to have to tell her he didn't know how he felt about her. That would ruin everything they had shakily built over the last few days. Taking a deep breath, he ran a hand through his messy hair and met her gaze squarely. "We're not ready for this yet," he said slowly, resting his hand on her waist. "I don't want to do something we might..."   
  
He trailed off, cringing at the wounded look in her eyes. He had been about to finish his sentence with the word "regret," but he knew that would've upset her even more.   
  
She released her grip on him immediately, the hurt clearly displayed on her face. "I'm sorry, Harry. I don't know what got into me," she murmured, keeping her gaze away from his. Wincing inwardly, he smacked himself mentally and cupped her cheek in his hand, bringing her eyes back to his. "That's not what this is about, love. I just want to make sure that we're ready when it happens. I mean, if you want it to happen, or..."   
  
A little laugh escaped her mouth, and she leaned up to kiss his cheek, looking a bit mollified by his stumbling words. "Harry, be quiet. It's fine. You're right; I'm not ready."   
  
Pushing at his chest, she let him scramble off of her before she hopped up from the chair, smiling softly at him. "I've got to go up to my room for a few minutes. I'll be right back."   
  
He nodded mutely, straining not to let her tousled hair, bright eyes, and slipping clothes affect him noticeably. With one last smile, Ginny turned and walked towards the girls' staircase, disappearing in a swirl of red and black. Harry took a few very deep breaths, and raced from the common room to his own room, sprinting to the loo. If he was going to be in the same room as her again this night, he needed a shower right now.   
  
A very cold shower.   
  
~*~   
  
***Dream***  
  
He watched the nighttime gathering from above, fear thumping in his veins. The bonfire sent sparks up into the cold air, and the black-robed group huddled close to the blazing inferno, seeking warmth in the dead of winter. He could only grab snatches of conversation; plans for attacks on Muggles, Fudge's weakening state, their own questions of their Master's plots. His hearing was coming and going with the cold winds that filled the clearing.   
  
Sweat iced his brow as he saw a few familiar faces, but there weren't as many at this gathering as there had been at the last Death Eater meeting he had been at, the ceremony that had occurred the night of the Third Task almost two years ago.   
  
Then, his eyes found Draco Malfoy's pale face.   
  
His stomach plummeted, and he felt anger rising up in him. Like father like son. He didn't expect less from the malicious Slytherin.   
  
Footsteps came from one side, and the group's murmurs halted abruptly as a tall, thin man walked towards the bonfire, flanked by a small, hunched figure. The Death Eaters dipped into low bows as their Master entered their space by the fire. A long, bony hand pulled back his hood, and Voldemort's face was revealed.   
  
He looked at his submissive followers coldly for a moment, then spoke: "Is the younger Malfoy here?"   
  
"I am, Master." Malfoy stepped out from the rest, a cool mask of deference on his face.   
  
"Then we will proceed as planned."   
  
Voldemort reached into his robes and pulled out his wand. The Death Eaters made a tight circle around the two figures in the middle. Malfoy looked especially pale as he lifted his left arm out to Voldemort. The Dark Lord grasped his wrist with one hand and pushed up the sleeve of his robes, revealing his bare forearm. There was a murmuring in the circle as Voldemort lowered the tip of his wand to Malfoy's white skin, whispering an indiscernible incantation.   
  
Hot, slicing agony exploded in his forehead. There was a sound of searing skin. He could smell the scent of burnt flesh, and his stomach twisted in revulsion. Horror overwhelmed him as Malfoy opened his mouth to yell in pain, writhing in Voldemort's grasp.   
  
But it wasn't his scream that Harry heard.   
  
***End Dream***   
  
Harry shot up in his bed, scar sending ripples of torture through his body as a scream ripped through the room, rough and hoarse with agony. His visions forgotten, he leapt from his bed by the dead fire, searching blindly for the screamer in the dark of the common room. Knocking into Ginny's bed, he ignored the stubborn ache in his injured foot as he reached for the screaming girl, shaking her to consciousness. "Ginny, wake up," he said gently, wrapping his arms around her as she clutched his shoulders, sobbing wildly into his chest as nonsense words escaped her gasping lips.  
  
Kissing her hair, he cradled her in his lap and tried to comfort her, not understanding how he could relieve her suffering. "It's all right, love," he whispered into her ear. "You're going to be fine."   
  
Crying desperately, she shuddered in his arms. He could feel her tears on his shirtless skin. "He's going to kill Harry...It's all my fault. Harry's going to die...Don't kill Harry! Stop, Tom! Stop," she said brokenly, fingers tightening their hold on his shoulders.  
  
A sick swell of hate swooped over him and Harry pulled Ginny's quivering form closer to his body, closing his eyes to the heart-rending cries and the thoughts of anger filling his mind and ears. Possessiveness and protectiveness rose within him, and he made a secret promise to himself and Ginny as she sobbed herself into a restless sleep in his arms. He would never let her come to any harm, even if it meant dying for her.  
  
It was his secret on that cold winter night.  
  
It made him forget his dreams.  
  
A/N: It was hard to write all the angst with all the happiness in this chapter, so I hope it flows well. I'm sorry if I've taken longer then what some readers wanted, but I had a bit of an upheaval, and I also had a bit of block. Please read and review! Many kudos and thanks to Anne! 


	6. Six

When the students began to file into the Gryffindor common room as they arrived back from their holidays, they took almost no notice of the subdued and silent couple sitting on opposite sides of the room. Harry was slumped in his favorite chair by the hearth, looking into the leaping flames with a brooding expression that most of his companions figured had to do with the approaching school day tomorrow. Ginny sat on the window seat on the other side of the room, staring off into the snow-swirled sky with unreadable eyes. She barely looked over to acknowledge her returning friends, so lost was she in her own little world. The incriminating evidence in the common room had been fixed earlier this morning, like the transfigured beds, and the ring was safely around her neck on the chain, hidden by her thick jumper.  
  
That was the sight that reached a red-cheeked Ron and Hermione as they walked into the common room, and they stopped dead in their tracks, feeling quite displeased. Ron leaned over to her ear. "Didn't we leave them in these exact bloody positions?"  
  
"Oh dear. I thought..." Hermione bit her bottom lip anxiously. "You don't think they're still fighting, do you?"  
  
"Bloody well looks like it." Ron ignored the half-scolding look on her face as he spoke. "Would you like to talk to Harry, or shall I tackle him first?"  
  
Lightly, she squeezed his arm. "I'll talk to Ginny first, and then I'll come over to you two. Maybe it isn't as bad as it looks."  
  
Smiling slightly, she made her way through the bustling room over to Ginny's place on the window. The younger girl didn't notice her approach, and when Hermione touched her shoulder, she was startled. "Hermione! I didn't know you were back. Did you have a nice holiday?"  
  
Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Did you?"  
  
Ginny resisted the urge to blush under Hermione's piercing gaze, schooling her features to complacency. She knew it must seem like she and Harry were still fighting, by the way it looked at first glance, but in reality she and Harry had spent the last few hours kissing each other whenever possible. When they saw the first carriage of students pull up to the doors, their little bubble had popped and they had strayed to opposite sides of the room with great reluctance. The wedding ring rested in the valley between her breasts and she felt its weight keenly as she struggled to reply to Hermione. "I did have a good holiday, actually. I got quite a bit of work done, and-"  
  
Hermione waved her hand, cutting Ginny off in mid-sentence. "That isn't what I meant. Why does Harry look like he just sat through five straight days of Potions?" She pursed her lips unhappily. "I really thought you would be able to patch this little row up by being alone together. Are you still fighting?"  
  
Sighing, Ginny touched Hermione's arm. "No. We're all right, Hermione. Harry just has a lot on his mind right now, that's all. We're friends, don't worry."  
  
The smile of relief on Hermione's face made Ginny wish she could tell the older girl everything that had happened, just to make sure it had happened. "I'm glad, Ginny. I really wanted you two to make up."  
  
"'Mione! What's taking you so long?"  
  
Hermione cringed at Ron's deliberate use of his nickname for her as he called across the room from Harry's chair. "I really hate it when he does that," she muttered, causing Ginny to giggle.  
  
"That's why he does it. I think he likes it when you're angry at him," she said, smiling cheerfully.  
  
With a long-suffering sigh, Hermione patted Ginny's shoulder and made her way over to Harry and Ron, glaring at the latter with hidden affection. Ginny watched the trio for a moment, smiling distantly. Harry was very lucky to have friends such as them, and she knew he knew it.  
  
"Hullo, Ginny!"  
  
She glanced to her side and saw Neville grinning at her, a content look in his eyes. She had been so wrapped up in her troubles with Harry, schoolwork, and Quidditch, that she hadn't had a lot of time to talk to Neville over the past few months. Smiling at him, she made a promise to talk to both him and Luna more in the coming term. It was no good to forget your friends, especially in times of turmoil. "Hi, Neville. How was your holiday?"  
  
"Quite good, thanks. Gran was in a good mood the whole time I was there, which made everything better," he said, coming to stand next to her. "How was yours?"  
  
Ginny replied in kind, and they spent a few minutes catching up. He left her to go find Luna around the castle, and she was left alone once more. The common room began to empty, most students tired from their journeys and ready for sleep. The fourth-year girl and her friends who had praised Ginny for her words to Malfoy came over to say hello before they went up to the dormitory, as did Colin, making Ginny feel quite content as she watched the snow fall onto the dark grounds. Soon only the trio by the hearth was in the common room with her, causing Ron to notice her solitude.  
  
"Ginny, what are you doing over there? Don't you want to know how Mum and Dad are?" He waved her over.  
  
Sighing, she picked herself up and walked over, smiling amiably. "How are Mum and Dad, Ron? Did they miss me?"  
  
Ron grinned. "Why should they? They had me there, didn't they?"  
  
She stuck her tongue out at him, feeling slightly put out by his tease. Hermione smacked his arm, glaring. Looking wounded, Ron rubbed the sore spot. "I was just joking! Yeah, they missed you. It was only me, Hermione and her parents, and Fred and George. Small for us, eh?" He cracked a grin.  
  
Ginny's brow furrowed. She passed over the omission of Percy; she hadn't spoken to him in over a year. But not hearing Charlie's or Bill's names disturbed her. Surely Dumbledore hadn't sent both her older brothers off on a mission? "What about-"  
  
"They're on the Continent for Dumbledore, ok? I can't tell you anything else," Ron cut her off, voice low.  
  
She pursed her lips unhappily. There he went again, being the protective older brother, not telling her anything important. It infuriated her, and she expected Hermione to smack him again. Strangely, the older girl was silent, face unmoved. Rage filled Ginny, and she wanted to scream at all of them. She was almost bloody sixteen and she had faced some of the same things as they had! What made them better than she?  
  
Her mouth was opened partway when Harry spoke up. "Thanks for the gift, Ron; those Cannons souvenirs are great. And your book of charms is going to come in handy, Hermione. Thanks, both of you," he said casually, shooting Ginny a glance.  
  
She sighed silently and looked away. Harry was right to stop her; she'd only stir up bad feelings, and she really didn't want to begin the new year with any fights.  
  
When she tuned back to the conversation, Hermione was thanking Harry for his gift of a book on wandless magic. "I'm so thrilled to learn more about it! You know, only a handful of wizards have been able to successfully perform spells with wandless magic. It's very rare," the older girl said with an eager tone.  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "Yeah, thanks Harry. It's her new favorite book on the bedside table," he deadpanned, slinging an arm around Hermione's shoulders.  
  
Ginny raised an eyebrow, rising to his opening. "And how would you know what books are on Hermione's bedside table, eh?"  
  
Ron choked and grew quite red as Hermione blushed furiously and Harry began to laugh heartily. Ginny smirked at her brother, feeling a bit mollified from his earlier jab. "I suppose Mum gave you the 'talk', right?" she asked, grinning wickedly.  
  
From his place on his chair, Harry began to wheeze from lack of air as the couple turned even redder, confirming Ginny's thoughts. She smiled contentedly, and sat down on the arm of Harry's chair. "That's what I thought. If I had to get one, then you should've definitely got one," she said unthinkingly, cringing as Ron's eyes widened.  
  
"When did you get one? Do you have a boyfriend I don't know about? Who's the slimy wanker?" he exclaimed, towering over Ginny as Hermione tried to placate him.  
  
Harry began laughing harder, wheezing for breath. Ginny figured it was more because of the memory of the "talk" they had got when they had told her parents in August than because of Ron's displeasure at her words. "Mum gave me one when she found out about Dean. Will you relax, Ron? Don't be so protective. I can have a boyfriend if I want," she said hotly.  
  
Ron did not look very happy at her words. "Bloody boyfriend my arse," he muttered, running a hand through his thick hair. Hermione smacked him lightly on the shoulder for the curse, and he grinned at her.  
  
Ginny rolled her eyes. "So mushy," she grumbled. "I'm going up to bed. Try not to kill Harry tonight, Ron. He probably won't stop laughing for days."  
  
Suppressing a knowing smile, she waved to the trio and headed for the girls' dormitory, trying not to laugh as Harry continued to chuckle despite Ron's orders to stop and tell him what was so funny. Ron would definitely kill him if he found that one out.  
  
~*~  
  
January hit with a vengeance, bringing frosty temperatures and heavy snows. Despite this, Ron held Quidditch practices like a drill sergeant, ordering six AM practices during the week and seven PM drills for the weekends. Sometimes, Harry was so wiped out that he would drop off to sleep in the changing rooms after practices, no matter what the time. All the males on the team thought it was amusing; one night, after he dragged himself into the common room at ten-thirty--an hour and a half after the end of practice- for the sixth time, Ron commented that he must be doing this on purpose.  
  
It was only a coincidence that Ginny always seemed to be able to sneak away and wake him up when he did those sorts of things.  
  
With his hectic schedule, something seemed to be nagging at him. Harry felt like he was forgetting some vital piece of information, something he knew was important. It bothered him to no end, and he didn't know what to do with himself. He couldn't work out what it was for the life of him. Finally, after dealing with his distractedness for almost three weeks, Ginny, who had been rather annoyed, told him to let it go and that it would come to him when he needed it.  
  
Since she had spoken to him, he had felt a bit more relaxed about his life and he appreciated it. With the news of Muggle attacks by Death Eaters coming from both the 'Daily Prophet' and Dumbledore, Harry was putting pressure on himself to find a way to act. In response, he had thrown himself into his schoolwork, eliciting comments from all his professors, even Snape, when his grades began to climb upward. Professor McGonagall spoke to him specifically one day after Transfiguration, saying that if he kept this kind of work up, he would be well on his way to becoming an Auror.  
  
He had really wished Umbridge had been there to hear that one.  
  
It was near the end of January when Fred and George popped by for a quick visit, coming to talk with Dumbledore but covering by doing sales for the Wheezes. Harry was in the common room studying with Ron and Hermione when the twins came in from their visit with the headmaster, both looking remarkably subdued.  
  
"How's the group today, mates?" Fred asked as he plopped down on the sofa next to Ron, his dragonhide jacket shining in the firelight.  
  
Ron glanced at his brother. "What did Dumbledore say?" he said quietly, turning a page in his Potions book.  
  
"Nothing we can talk about right now. Why don't we go outside? A fresh snow has just fallen; perfect for a snowball fight," George said cheerfully, shooting a look at the trio on the sofa.  
  
Hermione jumped up, marking her page in her book, and gathered her things. "I'll run up and get Ginny," she called as she raced up the steps.  
  
Harry shrugged and nudged Ron. "Let's go get our coats, mate."  
  
After a few minutes, everyone was trooping downstairs in their winter gear, looking forward to the wintry afternoon. Ginny had come downstairs looking especially fatigued, but she seemed cheerful enough as they headed outside. Harry managed to walk right beside her as Ron and Hermione walked ahead, trying to ignore the relentless teasing from Fred and George. As they walked into the freezing air, Harry brushed her arm. "Are you all right?" he asked softly.  
  
She smiled at him slightly. "Yes, I think so. I had a rough night; weird dreams seem to be plaguing me," she said lightly as they joined the others by the lake.  
  
"Speaking of the plague," Fred muttered as he caught her last word, jerking his head in the direction of the Quidditch pitch. All turned to look and saw Malfoy flying around over the ground, watching lazily as his Qudditch team ran their drills mechanically. Something inside Harry's mind stirred as he watched Malfoy, dark and hidden. He knew something...What was he supposed to remember...  
  
"Let's enchant some ice and fly it at him," Ron said gleefully, dropping to his knees to gather up some snow.  
  
Grabbing his elbow, Hermione hauled him up and glared at him. "As much as we want to, we can't, Ron! We're prefects!"  
  
Ginny shrugged, kneeling. "I'm not."  
  
Fred and George groaned. "Hermione, you're no fun," George muttered, cowering as she turned a glare on him.  
  
"Bloody Merlin, Ron! She's as bad as Mum!" Fred exclaimed, hiding behind George as they both stifled their laughter. Hermione glared at both of them while flicking her wand in their direction. Instantly, a pile of snow dropped on top of the twins' heads, causing them to fall to their knees with a gasp. Ron and Harry laughed loudly as Hermione smiled primly at the shocked men on the ground. Ginny stopped building her ice mountain to watch the happenings, a grin on her face.  
  
Fred was the first to recover, leaping up and pulling his brother up with him. "This is war, mates! Ginny, you're with us! Charge!" he said excitedly, rushing at the Trio with handfuls of snow, George and Ginny close behind.  
  
An all-out battle erupted, going on for many minutes. Ron tried valiantly to protect Hermione from the rampage of the gleeful twins, leaving Harry and Ginny to duke it out for themselves. Harry found himself having more fun than he had had in months, the most fun since Sirius' death. Immediately, he pushed Sirius from his mind, and dumped a handful of snow down Ginny's exposed neck. Trying to keep his blood under control, he grinned at her flushed face as she spun around, smacking his arm.  
  
"That was a cheap shot, Potter," she said, dark eyes sparkling merrily in the winter sun.  
  
Harry smirked. "They're all cheap shots in this world, Ginny."  
  
Her brow furrowed. "Let's not be too jolly today, Harry. Too much happiness might make you cheerful," she said, voice laced with sarcasm as she tossed a clump of snow in his face and raced off towards the edge of the lake, laughing merrily.  
  
He wiped his eyes quickly and ran after her, catching up easily with his long stride. Ron, Hermione, Fred, and George were still quite preoccupied with burying each other in the snow as Harry grabbed Ginny's wrist, falling into a snow bank in a flurry of arms and legs. Ginny landed beside him in a cloud of snowflakes, shining with laughter as she looked into his eyes, smiling gently. Leaning up on one elbow, he grinned, noticing how the bags under her eyes seemed to stand out even more against the white of the snow and the pale of her skin. Even with her cheerful face, she was worrying him. "Are you sure you're all right, Ginny?" he asked.  
  
She sighed and flashed a small grin at him. "So we're all worried about me now, eh? Guess you feel rather relieved," she teased.  
  
He shrugged and opened his mouth to reply, but the sounds never left his throat. Sharp, piercing pain sliced through his scar, blinding his mind, and he gasped with the force, dropping his head to bury it in his robes. The touch of Ginny's hands on his head and her panicked words did nothing to assuage the agony, and he clenched his fists as another wave of pain swam over him.  
  
"Ron! Ron! Hermione! Ron! R-"  
  
Abruptly, Ginny cut off her cries. Harry could feel the terror spread through her as she kept silent. Footsteps crunched towards them-from the opposite side of where Ron and the others were. He lifted up his head with a struggle, opening his eyes painfully to see Peter Pettigrew standing a few feet from him and Ginny, his wand pointed shakily at Ginny. Another swarm of pain overwhelmed him, but he gritted his teeth and sat up, moving in front of Ginny as to protect her. The scar on his elbow began to ache.  
  
"How the hell did you get in here?" Ginny whispered, clutching Harry's shoulder.  
  
Pettigrew swallowed nervously. "Master makes all things possible, Virginia. I must be loyal to Master," he said in a monotone, taking a step closer. His silver hand glinted in the bright winter light.  
  
"Harry! Harry!"  
  
Hermione's screams jarred Harry from the mind-numbing pain enveloping him, and he got to his feet precariously, keeping himself in front of Ginny. "Get out, Wormtail. Don't make me hurt you," he growled, slipping his hand inside his pocket for his wand. Memories of the end of his third year rushed back to the front of his mind, making him feel the ache of Sirius' loss and his own hate towards Pettigrew more poignantly. "I spared you once; don't think I'll do it again."  
  
Ginny grasped at his ankle, still on her knees. "Remus is coming, Harry. You can't let him near," she said urgently. Relief flooded through him as he heard her first words. Remus would know what to-  
  
Remus was a werewolf.  
  
"He can't come near. It's the silver," he whispered, staring at the shining hand and almost becoming blinded.  
  
"Harry! Harry, move!"  
  
Harry ignored Remus' and Ron's cries as they came closer to him and stepped closer to Pettigrew. "What do you want and who let you in?" he asked harshly.  
  
Pettigrew seemed to be losing his confidence. "No time for that now, Harry. Must obey the Master." He leveled his wand at Harry, looking deathly pale. "Don't try to stop me, or I shall kill him where he stands, and Master wouldn't like that," he whispered as footsteps raced towards him and came to a sudden halt.  
  
Harry tensed, prepared to dive. Cries of terror went up around them as Pettigrew screamed a raw "Crucio!" A flash of red swam across Harry's field of vision and he fell to the ground, oddly feeling no pain as something landed on top of him. He wondered if he had moved Ginny out of the line of fire.  
  
Suddenly he realized that Ginny was lying on top of him, shaking.  
  
His heart stopped.  
  
His scar exploded into sudden pain.  
  
Five different spells flew past his head as he gathered a shuddering Ginny in his arms and he saw Pettigrew drop to the ground before him. Professors McGonagall and Snape rushed past him to Pettigrew's prone form as he felt a hand on his shoulder, pushing him away from the action. "What happened, Harry?" Lupin asked, sounded shaken to his very core.  
  
Harry looked up at him, paler than the snow surrounding him. "He got in..." he trailed off as Ginny stirred against him. He looked down at her face and saw the blatant pain in her eyes. "Oh god," he whispered.  
  
She grimaced as another shudder of agony lanced through her. "I dreamed this, Harry..." she breathed. "I dreamed it."  
  
Harry's stomach knotted together as she dropped off to unconsciousness. He and Lupin stood together in silence as they heard footsteps come towards them quickly. Finally, the older man touched his shoulder. "Let me float her up to the Hospital Wing, before someone thinks something else is going on," he said softly, waving his wand quickly. Ginny became light as a feather in Harry's arms and he let Lupin take her away, watching bleakly as he walked away.  
  
There was no way it could be any worse.  
  
A fist connected with his jaw, sending even more pain through his head, and he sprawled to the ground, landing harshly on his side. "What the hell?" he cursed, rubbing his jaw and looking up to his attacker, expecting Malfoy.  
  
It was a seething, red-faced Ron.  
  
"What the hell do you think you were doing back there?" he exclaimed, towering over him as Hermione rushed over, followed closely by Fred and George. "You almost got my sister killed!"  
  
Harry's eyes widened. "What?"  
  
"You heard me, you bloody sod! Letting her get hit with an Unforgivable! Some friend you are to her!" he screamed, preparing to advance on Harry.  
  
Fred and George clasped Ron's arms, looking positively shocked. "Don't be a barking idiot, Ron! This wasn't Harry's fault," George said harshly.  
  
Hermione went to help Harry up. "Blaming this on Harry is completely ridiculous!" she cried, glaring unhappily at the blazing red-head.  
  
Ron scoffed. "Ridiculous, right? He's always getting her in trouble! He practically got her killed in her first year!"  
  
Harry froze, staring at Ron like he was a ghost. He couldn't believe Ron was saying these things to him; how could he think this all about him?  
  
Bowled over, the twins released their younger brother, backing a few steps away. Hermione gaped at Ron, tears forming in her eyes. He glared at all of them before stalking away, a swirl of black against the stark white of the school grounds. Hermione squeezed Harry's shoulder and raced after him, calling his name tearfully as he headed up to the castle. Fred and George stared at Harry mutely as Dumbledore walked up to them, looking gravely at his young pupil. "Harry, I need to see you in my office in a half-hour. Please be there," he said softly before turning and following McGonagall towards the castle, who had Pettigrew's body floating at her side.  
  
Fred came up to Harry, grasping his shoulder. "It's all right, Harry. Ron was always bit of an idiot when it came to Ginny. He just can't see her as older than ten," he said quietly, George nodding in assent.  
  
Dumbly, Harry nodded, letting them guide him up to the castle with clenched fists.  
  
Sitting silently in his chair, Harry could feel the eyes of Remus and Dumbledore on him. After telling them what he had just witnessed, he was feeling quite tired. There was a dull ache in his scar, and he knew Voldemort was pleased. He couldn't understand why; one of his lackeys had just failed in a mission for him. Stomach churning, he clenched his fists at the thought of Ginny lying in the Hospital Wing once more.  
  
And it was his fault.  
  
Again.  
  
"So he got in through the gates. How? Someone would've had to open it for him from the inside," Lupin mused gravely, leaning on Dumbledore's desk.  
  
Dumbledore sighed. "Harry, did you notice anyone opening the gates of the school?" he asked gently.  
  
Harry shook his head. "I wasn't paying much attention, sir," he mumbled.  
  
"No one faults you for it, Harry," Lupin jumped in quickly.  
  
But it was his fault. He was always bringing the ones he cared for into danger. All he had to do was look at the past June and remember Sirius, and the other members of the Order. He had brought them all to harm, even death. Now, Ginny was suffering at his hand. What could he do to stop the pain from latching onto his family?  
  
"I guess this is it, then," he said softly, bringing the attentions of the men back to him.  
  
Dumbledore leaned forward, looking extremely concerned. "What do you mean, Harry?"  
  
Jerking his head up, Harry gazed straight into the undisturbed blue eyes and his stomach knotted. "Well, I can't keep putting people in danger, and if anyone finds out that Ginny and me...Well..." he trailed off, feeling especially miserable.  
  
Lupin touched his shoulder. "Are you saying that you think that you need to push Ginny away because of this incident?" he asked incredulously.  
  
Harry shifted uncomfortably. "Not just Ginny. Look what happened in the summer? You all need to live; being with me won't save you," he said defensively.  
  
"I think Miss Weasley would have something quite different to say if she heard you right now," Dumbledore commented, a small smile playing at his lips.  
  
"Harry, this is not what we want from you. If living meant leaving you alone to fend for yourself, then no one would want any part of it. Sirius would throw you in St. Mungo's if he could hear you," Lupin said forcefully.  
  
Trying to shrug Lupin off, Harry slumped in his seat, averting his eyes. "All I do is hurt people," he muttered.  
  
There was a moment of silence, and then Dumbledore let out a sigh. "No, Harry. Voldemort tries to hurt the people you love. He only succeeds when you think like this. If you pull away, he has won already," the headmaster said softly.  
  
Anguish overwhelmed Harry, and he buried his head in his hands. "But what if they die?" he whispered. All he could see was Ginny's pale, shaking face from this afternoon; Sirius' stricken form as he fell behind the veil; Cedric's cold body lying in the graveyard, eyes blank and sightless...  
  
Hands gripped his arms. "Your parents wouldn't want you to think like this. I remember when James wanted Lily to go into hiding with you, before they performed the Fidelius Charm, and she almost kicked him out of the house for even thinking about splitting the family apart." Lupin's voice cracked and he released Harry. Harry heard his footsteps recede to the hearth. The portraits kept silent as he lifted his head, staring at the back of Lupin's bowed head.  
  
Dumbledore cleared his throat softly. "It's a valiant thought, Harry, but it defeats the purpose of even having relationships with people. If you know you're going to tear yourself away anyway, why get emotionally connected with anyone? This is the time to keep your friends closer than ever to you, not push them away," he said kindly, smiling gently at him.  
  
Harry took a deep breath and straightened up, nodding at the headmaster. His eyes went to Lupin. "I'm sorry, Remus," he said. No matter what he thought himself, he knew deep inside that both professors were right in what they said. It would take him a while to think like them, but he would accomplish it.  
  
For Ginny's sake.  
  
Lupin turned around, eyes glistening brightly in the firelight. "Don't worry, Harry. It's good to remember these things," he said, smiling sadly.  
  
Dumbledore motioned for Harry to rise. "Why don't you visit Miss Weasley? I've heard from Madam Pomfrey that she should be fully recovered by the morning. You managed to protect her from getting most of the curse, so she'll have very little damage," he commented cheerfully. "I'll see you on Tuesday, as usual."  
  
Nodding, Harry gave Lupin a small grin and exited the room, shoving his hands in his pockets. He wanted to go up to Ginny desperately, but he knew Ron would be there. Ron would not want to see him, and he didn't especially want to see Ron at the moment; the wounds from this afternoon were too fresh. The common room didn't sound too attractive at the moment; he didn't want to face all his classmates right now. Not knowing where to go, he started wandering aimlessly, avoiding students as best as he could. Although he was tired, he dreaded sleep; who knew what his dreams would be tonight?  
  
'I dreamed this, Harry...'  
  
He stopped for a moment. She had dreamed it. Had Ginny dreamed of Pettigrew's attack? How was that possible? Was Voldemort still inside her?  
  
Feeling sick at the thought, he turned his eyes to the wooden door he had stopped at. It was the Room of Requirement, a place of both good and frustrating memories. The DA hadn't resumed meetings this year, only because Lupin had returned and he was so thorough in everything. Harry actually hadn't been inside the room since his meeting with Ginny, and he was curious to know what he would find if he went inside. What did he need right now?  
  
Slowly, he pushed the door open, stepping inside and closing it after him. The sight that met him was astounding.  
  
The room was bare.  
  
Suddenly, as he looked around in wonder, he realized why.  
  
He needed Ginny.  
  
~*~  
  
She didn't feel the pain as much as she knew it was there as she lay in her bed, a crescent moon hanging in the far corner of her window, bright against the starless sky. Her eyes were open, free of sleep; she was too worried to sleep. Little threads of stinging ache shot through her from time to time as she looked out onto the grounds, sighing more than once.  
  
She hadn't seen Harry once since he had let Professor Lupin take her up to the Hospital Wing and she was concerned. When she had asked her brothers and Hermione where he was, Ron had glowered angrily as Fred told her he was with Dumbledore, all the while glaring at Ron. Hermione looked positively torn when they had left the room at Madam Pomfrey's insistence some hours ago, whispering something about Ron and Harry not speaking before she was shooed out. Those words had haunted Ginny since then, and she hadn't been able to stop thinking about Harry all night. She knew what a stubborn idiot her brother could be, but she could only hope this was resolved quickly. Harry did not need to be abandoned right now, especially by his closest friend.  
  
There was a tiny rustling beside her bed, and she turned to see Harry's lean form being revealed by a swish of his Invisibility Cloak, his face drawn and pale. Immediately she smiled at him, holding out her hand to him. "Hi, Harry," she whispered as he sat on the edge of her bed and took her hand.  
  
"Did I wake you?" he asked, voice hoarse with exhaustion. His touch on her knuckles began to soothe her pain instantly.  
  
She shook her head. "I've haven't slept at all tonight. What about you?"  
  
Harry sighed. "Not a chance. I've been in the Room of Requirement waiting for Madam Pomfrey to go to bed," he replied, shoving a piece of old parchment in his robes pocket.  
  
Raising an eyebrow, she gazed at his tired face. "Oh? And what did you find in the room that you required?" she teased lightly, trying to make him smile.  
  
To her happiness, a small grin crossed his face momentarily. "Absolutely nothing."  
  
Now she was confused. "That doesn't make sense-"  
  
"Because I didn't need any material things, Ginny. I needed a person." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "I needed you."  
  
Her heart fluttered, and she smiled at him, feeling tears gather in her eyes. "Oh, Harry. I'm so sorry."  
  
Shaking his head, he shifted closer to her. "No, I'm sorry for this. I promised myself I would never let anyone hurt you, and I failed. Are you all right?"  
  
Gazing at him curiously, she reached up with her free hand to brush the fringe from his eyes, revealing his reddened scar for a brief moment. "Of course I am. How are you? I heard Ron was being a bastard to you. What did he say?" she asked, running her fingers through his hair.  
  
He sighed, looking uncomfortable. "He's angry at me because you're hurt. He seems to think I have a penchant for trying to get you killed," he said bitterly, running his thumb back and forth across her skin.  
  
Anger boiled up inside her, and she huffed unhappily. "You're kidding me! It wasn't your fault! What is he thinking? Prat."  
  
Harry laughed quietly, squeezing her hand. "He's just worried for you. It's a family thing."  
  
She grinned lightly at him. "You're right; it is a family thing. In Mum's last letter to me, she told me to tell you she's very worried you won't eat enough at meals," she said, sitting up against her pillows. "You're a part of the family, Harry. Ron will get over himself quickly; I'll make sure of it."  
  
He gazed at her oddly, eyes dark with something she couldn't place. Her heart sped up as he leaned closer to her mouth, hesitating. She closed the rest of the distance, letting herself unwind as his mouth moved over hers, filling her with a feeling she knew very well when it came to Harry: love.  
  
His guilt was quite palpable, even in their brief kiss, and when he pulled away she touched his arm gently. "You know it wasn't your fault, don't you?" she asked hesitantly, searching his gaze.  
  
Again, a sigh left his lips and he kissed her quickly again. "I think so. I can't help what I feel, though," he replied.  
  
They sat in silence for a moment, letting the connection between their hands soothe and calm them. Then Harry tightened his grip on her hand. "Maybe you should try to sleep," he said quietly.  
  
Apprehension washed over her, and she grasped both of his hands tightly. "No. Please don't leave me, Harry. I don't want to sleep," she pleaded, gazing up at him. With any other person, she would feel humiliated to beg for someone's company, but not with Harry. She knew he understood her need for him right now; he too knew the horrors of a deep sleep.  
  
Harry didn't hesitate a moment in sliding closer to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder as she lay her head on his chest. "I can't stay the whole night; I'd be shot in the morning," he whispered, causing a soft laugh to escape her mouth.  
  
"Don't be silly; of course you can't stay the whole night. There's Quidditch practice in the morning anyway. Ron won't have the opportunity to come up and find you," she said, muscles relaxing as she felt his chest rise and fall below her cheek. "Just stay until Madam Pomfrey starts to stir. She'll be back around five to check on me, or so she said."  
  
He rested his chin on her hair and sighed. "Ginny?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"If I said that I thought we needed to stop seeing each other, what would you do?" he asked slowly, tensing as the words left his mouth.  
  
The breath caught in her throat, and tears smarted behind her eyes. Lifting her head to look him in the eye, she smacked his chest. "I'd hit you and tell you to stop being an idiot! Don't be absurd, Harry. I would never let you do that. You'd have to kill me to make me leave you," she said hotly, eyes burning.  
  
Harry gazed at her for a moment before crushing her to his form, burying his face in her hair. "I hoped you'd say that," he muttered, voice muffled by her curls.  
  
Kissing his neck, she curled tighter to his body warmth. "I'll always say that, you silly prat. Don't doubt that," she replied softly, rubbing his back soothingly.  
  
Neither one of them got a moment of sleep that night.  
  
~*~  
  
He was so close to achieving his master's goal, close enough to taste the victory. Seeing Potter sneak up to the Hospital Wing had confirmed his personal suspicions, but he knew Master would want something more concrete than that. What he needed was physical proof; a touch or a kiss would be exactly the thing. How would he get it?  
  
If only Pettigrew hadn't failed! All the bumbling lackey had to do was capture either Potter or Weasley; how hard was that, especially when you had an inside spy? He had set everything up for the sniveling servant, including leaving the gates open in the early morning, and the mission had gone awry!  
  
The only thing to do was pay closer attention to them both, especially when they were together. Even stalking them when one of them disappeared without their friends would be sufficient. He didn't suffer through the pain of the Mark to fail on his first assignment; he would be a disgrace to everyone, especially himself.  
  
Potter would not escape so easily next time. He would make sure of it.  
  
~*~  
  
Whoo. That took a while, huh? I'm sorry for being so slow with this. November sucks major butt; it's been the worst month ever. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks a bunch to everyone who has reviewed, and major kudos to Anne! ^^ 


	7. Seven

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Harry Potter. I'm just being evil and diabolical with the characters. All power to JKR!  
  
~*~ When Harry awoke the following morning, it was to a timid calling of his name. The sun was bright and high in the sky as he opened his eyes groggily, scrunching up his face. Being in his bed this late surprised him, and he almost leapt up from under his blankets as he realized how late he must be to practice. But memories of the previous day assailed him and he stayed put, remembering exactly why he wasn't at practice or even awake yet.  
  
Wormtail.  
  
Ron.  
  
Ginny.  
  
"Harry?"  
  
He reached out a pajama-clad arm and pulled back the curtains surrounding his bed, not believing his ears. She wouldn't dare come in here...  
  
Would she?  
  
"Hermione?" he said incredulously as her pale face met his gaze. Her eyes were bloodshot, and in her hand was a plate of eggs and toast. He sat up, swiping a hand across his eyes to clear them of sleep, and stared at his friend in shock. "How did you get in here?"  
  
A small grin spread across her taut face. "You're not the only one with a good Confusion Charm," she said with forced cheer as she made her way to his bed. When she came closer, he could see a glass of pumpkin juice floating behind her. "You missed breakfast; I decided to bring you some," she added as she sat down beside him, holding out the food to him.  
  
His stomach growled as he looked on the steaming plate. He hadn't eaten since yesterday's lunch, and he was starved now. Reaching for the plate, he grinned at Hermione. "Thanks. I appreciate it," he said, shoveling some egg onto his fork.  
  
Hermione smiled slightly. "I thought you might be hungry. We missed you at supper last night. The whole school is talking about Wormtail's appearance," she said tiredly.  
  
Harry swallowed his food and frowned. "I needed some time to think, that's all," he muttered defensively.  
  
"I wasn't going to ask where you were. I reckoned you might not come," she said tartly, eyebrow raised. "Ron didn't eat a thing, if it makes you feel better."  
  
His stomach dropped like a stone. "It doesn't."  
  
She sighed. "I'm glad. Fred and George gave him quite a talking to after we left Ginny, and I believe they sent an owl to Mrs. Weasley. It's only a matter of days until a Howler is sent Ron's way," she said as he cleaned his plate, nose wrinkling minutely. "How do you eat so much?"  
  
"I'm a growing boy," he quipped, draining his goblet and setting the used dining ware on his bedside table. Reaching under his pillow, he pulled out his glasses and put them on, throwing the world from blurry to clear. "Are you all right?"  
  
"I'm more worried about you, Harry," she replied softly, scooting closer to his side.  
  
Abruptly, he turned away from her searching eyes. "You shouldn't be; I'm fine," he said stiffly.  
  
"Stop telling me that! If you're fine then you're insane. A good friend of yours was attacked yesterday and your best friend isn't speaking to you. I don't see how you could be fine at all," Hermione said scathingly, grasping his elbow.  
  
"What do you expect me to say, Hermione? I don't know how I feel right now," Harry retorted, meeting her gaze squarely. "I know this is my fault, but-"  
  
She gaped at him, compassion flooding her face. "Oh, Harry. Ginny's injuries aren't your fault. I thought you knew that."  
  
He turned his stony glare to the window. "I should have let Sirius kill him," he said, voice filled with wrath and hatred. "Maybe things would be different if I had."  
  
The pair sat in thought for a moment before Hermione broke the silence. "You can't think like that, Harry. Maybe things would be different, but you can never tell," she said softly, reaching over to squeeze his hand in comfort. "The past is the past; you can't change it. You can only learn from it."  
  
Harry glanced at her and gave her a small smile. "Thanks, Hermione. I appreciate that," he said, squeezing her hand in return. Ever the voice of reason, Hermione was. Maybe Ginny's words could finally begin to sink into his head, with Hermione's unknowing help.  
  
The bushy-haired girl smiled softly. "Glad I can help in some way. I don't think I'll be able to help you with Ron, though. He's such a thick-headed idiot sometimes."  
  
"He seems to act up every year; there's always something wrong with something I do," Harry said bitterly. "This time, he'll have to grovel. He went too far. I would never put Ginny in danger intentionally."  
  
Watching her face as he spoke, Harry could almost see the wheels in her mind start to turn, the pieces click together. She nudged him, eyes bright. "You like her, don't you?" she asked.  
  
Harry started, gaping slightly at Hermione. "What?"  
  
She rolled her eyes and giggled lightly. "You like Ginny, right?"  
  
"Of course I do. We're friends, aren't we?" he replied, looking quite like a deer caught in headlights.  
  
Nudging him again, she raised an eyebrow. "You know what I mean, Harry." There was a moment of silence as Harry squirmed internally at her words. Then Hermione touched his arm. "She's become very pretty, hasn't she?" she mused, sending a sidelong glance at him.  
  
Licking his lips nervously, he looked away from her steady eyes, fidgeting. This was getting too close for his comfort. "I suppose so," he mumbled. He couldn't tell Hermione that he thought Ginny was one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen; that would be a dead giveaway.  
  
Hermione smiled smugly and kept at him, voice light. "It's funny how she doesn't have a boyfriend yet; I hear boys around school are trying their hardest to get her attention."  
  
His blood boiled with the heat of jealousy as he struggled to keep his face clear. "No kidding?" he croaked out.  
  
"It seems like she's got her eye on one specific boy. I can't imagine who it could be," Hermione continued blithely, smoothing out her robes.  
  
Dying to blurt everything out, Harry had to master his words. "I can't think of anyone."  
  
She turned to him. "Oh, can't you? You really are quite thick, Harry. I know you like her. Don't you think she might like you back?"  
  
He swallowed with some trouble. "But you said she had given up on me last year," he said thickly.  
  
A knowing smile flitted across her face. "Oh yes. But that doesn't mean she's over you," she said, standing and collecting his dishes. "She's been given the all-clear by Madam Pomfrey. Why don't you bring her back to the tower? Ron and I have some homework to do in the library; I'm sure Ginny would appreciate your thoughtfulness," she added slyly before giving a little wave and walking out the door.  
  
Harry flopped onto his back, bringing his arms over his eyes to shield them from the world. Hermione was too clever for her own good.  
  
~*~  
  
"You're all clear, Miss Weasley. You may go back to Gryffindor Tower," Madam Pomfrey said with a note of disapproval as Ginny slid from her bed and reached for her clothes. "All I ask is that you don't strain yourself for the next week or so. You were very lucky yesterday."  
  
Ginny beamed at the fussing mediwitch. "I promise, Madam Pomfrey. Don't mind me saying, but I hope I'm not back up here for a long time," she said cheerfully as she headed to the loo to change.  
  
Taking a moment to look at herself in the mirror, Ginny pursed her lips at the sight of her pale, drawn face. "Be happy! You're getting out of the Hospital Wing," she muttered to herself, pulling her night dress over her head and tossing it to the side as she reached for her jumper. The heavy turtleneck hid the small bruises on her neck, an accidental happening from last night. With Harry in the same bed as her, she couldn't expect him not to need a bit of comfort. It's not like she had trouble with it; over the last few months, her proficiency with Concealing Charms had grown amazingly.  
  
Stepping out of the loo, she handed her night dress to Madam Pomfrey and slipped her school robes over her regular clothes. The nurse nodded briskly. "Well, off with you then. You have an escort back to the tower waiting for you out there. Take care, Miss Weasley," she said.  
  
"Thanks, Madam Pomfrey," Ginny replied before walking out into the waiting area of the Hospital Wing, hoping against hope that Ron wasn't out there. She was definitely not in the mood to speak to him, especially after what he had said to Harry yesterday. The sight that met her wary eyes was a relief and a surprise.  
  
Slouched in one of the chairs by the door to the corridor was an exhausted- looking Harry, black hair mussed even more than usual. Ginny stopped in the doorway for a moment, shocked. He came up here, even with the threat of an appearance from Ron? Pleasure swelled up from the pit of her stomach, and a small smile spread on her face. "Don't you spend enough time here as it is, Harry?" she teased.  
  
Straightening immediately, Harry looked her way and she could see a lightening of his dark countenance as he stood to go to her. "You look well," he commented softly, coming face to face with her.  
  
The urge to throw herself into his arms and kiss him almost overwhelmed her, and she had to stop herself from reaching out to touch his hand. "I feel good as new. Here to take me home?" she asked cheerfully.  
  
He nodded, and held out his arm to her. She looked up at him questioningly, hoping this wasn't a sign of him thinking she was too weak to walk on her own. Smiling, he shrugged. "Thought I'd be proper about it."  
  
Ginny grinned at him and slipped her elbow through his, still keeping an acceptable distance from his frame. "Hermione's been to speak with you, hasn't she? Nice to see you're listening to her advice at last."  
  
He laughed softly, surprising her with the sound as he held the door to the corridor open for her. She couldn't believe he was actually laughing with her. Maybe he wasn't going to be as sullen as she thought he would be, considering what had happened with Ron and her. "Has Ron spoken to you yet?"  
  
"I haven't seen him since yesterday, actually. I'm sure he thinks I'm off planning your demise, since that's all I seem to do," Harry replied flatly as they slowly went down the hall.  
  
Casting a quick look around their immediate area, Ginny made sure they were completely alone before moving closer to his side, breathing in his warmth and scent. "You hide your devious thoughts very well," she murmured, wrapping her arms around his waist and stopping their movement.  
  
"Ginny..." His voice was wary, but she felt his hands settle at the small of her back.  
  
"Harry, just for a minute. With the way my brother's going to be on me for the rest of my life, I don't know when I'll be able to see you alone again," she said unhappily, cutting off his protests as she looked up at his face. Gaping slightly, she peered closer at the dark circles under his eyes, the pale, strained look to his skin. "You're not all right, Harry," she whispered.  
  
He shrugged, obviously trying to steer away from the subject of himself. "I haven't been for a long time, but that's beside the point. Everyone can be worried about you for a change," he joked weakly, cracking a small smile for her.  
  
Reaching up, she kissed his cheek, moving her arms to wrap around his neck. "That's hardly a change," she said, shutting her eyes tightly and resting her forehead on his chin. Madam Pomfrey was right when she said to take it slowly; already Ginny felt weaker from being on her feet for so long.  
  
"You're tired, Ginny. Why don't I take you back to the tower so you can rest a little more?" he asked softly.  
  
Abruptly, she looked up and their mouths brushed for a split second. His arms around her tightened and he let out a slow breath, eyes fastened on her mouth. A smile curved her lips and she leaned towards him, hesitating slightly as he bent his head to meet her. Hot breath passed from his mouth, hitting her skin lightly, and she sighed. With that final sound, he closed the distance between their mouths with a swift movement. She almost went completely limp in his arms as the feeling of his lips sliding against hers left her drowning in his wake.  
  
A low sound escaped the back of her throat and she twisted her fingers in his hair, pulling herself closer to him. The air shook around her, feeding off the charged environment. She and Harry had melded into one space, one time; they were the only ones in the world.  
  
Suddenly, there was a slight change in the air; someone edging along the border of their world, coming closer and closer. She felt it even as she felt Harry under her hands. Startled by her heightened senses, she pulled away from Harry, feeling him pull back at the same time. His dark eyes showed surprise mixed with the ever-prevalent desire, and a shiver ran through her, leaving goosebumps on her skin. With a deep breath, she felt steadier. Kissing Harry always left her feeling lighter than a feather, ready to fly away at the smallest breeze. It was wonderful.  
  
He exhaled slowly before speaking. "I think someone's coming."  
  
Jumping a little in his arms, she stared at him. "That's odd. I think so too."  
  
With great reluctance, they pulled away from each other. Her knees wobbled as the support of his arm left her, so he hooked his elbow under hers once more. Footsteps sounded down the corridor and she and Harry glanced at each other, eyebrows raised in curiosity. How the hell had they both known someone was around?  
  
"Ginny!"  
  
Neville raced towards them, a handkerchief held to his nose. Ginny smiled, hearing the thick edge of a cold in her friend's voice. "Hi, Neville."  
  
Neville stopped in front of her and Harry, grinning. "Hullo, Harry. I heard about your accident yesterday, Ginny. Are you all right?" he asked.  
  
Nodding, Ginny reached out and touched Neville's elbow. "I'm fine. Harry's just taking me back to the tower."  
  
Harry chose to interject at this point, also having noticed Neville's condition. "What are you doing up here, Neville? You sound a bit ill."  
  
Neville grinned sheepishly and blew his nose. "Yes. I just came up for a quick fix from Madam Pomfrey. I should be fine by the morning." He paused and leaned closer to the pair. "Did you know Minister Fudge is here to see Dumbledore? I think he came to take Pettigrew away," he said, shaking his head in disbelief. "I can't believe he's alive. I thought Sirius Black had killed him."  
  
Out of the corner of her eye, Ginny saw Harry's face tighten, and she swallowed. "I think we were all under that misconception, Neville. But, Sirius Black wasn't a murderer in any way," she replied softly, wishing she could be alone with Harry once more.  
  
Neville nodded. "I suppose so. Well, you should get back, Ginny. See you later." He gave a little wave, nodded at Harry, and passed them, soon entering the Hospital Wing and leaving Harry and Ginny alone.  
  
Harry's arm muscles were tense under her hand, and she squeezed gently. "Fudge is in the castle?" she echoed, looking up into his face.  
  
Face completely expressionless, Harry started walking, pulling Ginny along with him. "I want to know what's going on," he said darkly, rounding a corner.  
  
Apprehension washed over her as she hurried to catch up with him, feeling weary. "Harry, now might not be the best time for this," she muttered. Sometimes he was just so irrational! Did he have any idea where he was going in the first place? What did he expect to accomplish?  
  
Finally, he came to a halt in front of the gargoyle that led to Dumbledore's office. Ginny caught her breath as he muttered the password and the stone figure moved aside. Her stomach clenched as Harry pulled her up the stairs, and she heard the gargoyle move back into place. The last time she had been in Dumbledore's office with Harry was when he had rescued her from the Chamber. Memories of that year began to threaten her mind and she shut her eyes, stumbling against Harry's arm as he crouched down, ear turned towards the slightly open door of Dumbledore's office. She could hear the frustrated voice of Fudge competing with Dumbledore's calm, steady tones. Her heart tightened. Harry's muscles tensed.  
  
"You seem to think that Peter Pettigrew was trying to attack Potter? Pettigrew is an admirable man! It's a miracle he escaped from Black with his life!" Fudge exclaimed loudly. Ginny could just imagine his rotund face becoming redder than a tomato as he faced off with Dumbledore.  
  
"I already told you the events of that day in town, Cornelius. I told you the circumstances surrounding Sirius Black this past June. Have you forgotten so quickly?" Dumbledore asked coolly.  
  
There was a loud huff of indignation from Fudge. "Harry Potter is a troubled boy. Just because he alerted us to You-Know-Who's return does not mean he is stable. Consorting with a mass murderer? Kidnapping his schoolmates and bringing them to the Department of Mysteries?"  
  
There was a long, tense pause. Ginny shuddered with anger as she replayed Fudge's words in her mind. This was exactly why Hermione had stopped her subscription to the Daily Prophet. Harry was silent next to her. It was too dark for her to see his face; she had no idea what he was feeling.  
  
Fudge took a deep breath. "I want Potter expelled, Albus."  
  
Shock coursed through Ginny as she gaped at the door. Harry jerked, breathing speeding up. She felt the anger and hate in his veins as clearly as she felt her own, and she squeezed his hand to keep him from flying through the door and strangling Fudge with his bare hands.  
  
Silence overcame the room but for the scratching of a quill. Ginny and Harry waited for what seemed an eternity for Dumbledore's answer. Fudge cleared his throat. "He's a menace to the student body. I will not support you if he continues to be in this school."  
  
Dumbledore sighed. "You are disillusioned, Cornelius. Who tells you about Harry? Where do you get your information?"  
  
"I don't see how that has anything to do with this," Fudge replied icily.  
  
"Harry Potter is an exceptional boy. I would not let him leave this school for anything. You are still listening to the wrong people. Do not let your greed for money and importance blind you from this simple truth: Harry is the only hope to defeating Voldemort," Dumbledore said, his tone steely and edged with anger.  
  
"Oh, that's exactly what you want, isn't it? You make me look like the villain, hoping that you can put one of your puppets in my place," Fudge shot back angrily. "I will not fall because of you, Dumbledore! I order you to expel that boy!"  
  
"You have no part in the running of this school, and I take orders from no man. I will not expel Harry."  
  
Ginny shifted closer to Harry's side as her breathing grew easier. Dumbledore would stand by Harry no matter what. She felt calmer than she had in days, knowing Harry was safe at Dumbledore's side.  
  
"If you have no more business, and if your Aurors have taken Pettigrew into custody, I think it is time for you to go back to London," Dumbledore continued calmly.  
  
"Fine. This is not over in the slightest, Dumbledore," Fudge said stiffly. "Come along, Weasley."  
  
Ginny gasped as Harry pulled her up to the corner of the stairs, hidden from Fudge's view as he opened the door and stomped out. Her brother? Sure enough, following at Fudge's heels was Percy, quill in one hand and parchment in the other. His head was high, and he looked unchanged from the last time Ginny had seen him, over a year and a half ago. Her shock turned into horror. Percy was still working for Fudge? Ron would kill him.  
  
"You may come in, Harry."  
  
Dumbledore's quiet voice came as a surprise to Ginny, but Harry seemed unperturbed as he lifted her up and led her into the brightly-lit office, nodding as some of the portraits called greetings to him. Ginny kept her eyes on the weary-looking headmaster, heart going out to him.  
  
Dumbledore sighed and looked at Harry's strained face. "I admire your self- control, Harry. It must have been hard to hear the slanders and not be able to defend yourself."  
  
"I've grown used to it," Harry said, sounding much older than sixteen in those few words.  
  
The headmaster smiled slightly and nodded. "Yes, I suppose you have," he said thoughtfully, and turned to Ginny. "You see your brother is still with the Minister?"  
  
She nodded, not sure if she was supposed to reply in any other way. Dumbledore sighed again and went behind his desk to sit down. "I was hoping he would see my way of thinking when I spoke to him this summer, but he didn't. I'm sorry to lose his support. He was a very clever boy when he was here."  
  
"Is Pettigrew in custody?" Harry asked, surprising Ginny with his frankness with the headmaster. Maybe he wasn't telling her everything he was doing.  
  
"Yes. I will make sure his trial is taken care of by the right people." Dumbledore massaged his temples with his long fingers, looking quite tired. "Something must be done about Fudge. He's been too corrupted to work with anymore."  
  
Harry muttered something out of the side of his mouth, looking especially murderous. Ginny thought it sounded a lot like "Malfoy," but she couldn't be sure.  
  
"I am going to the Wizengamot, Harry. Fudge cannot be the Minister anymore. I'm going to call for a vote of no confidence. It might work; it might not. I must try to salvage this before it grows any worse," Dumbledore said, looking straight at Harry.  
  
Then, an amiable smile graced his wrinkled face. "But, I think I shall first try to lighten the mood of the school. Perhaps a Valentine's Day celebration is in order? A party would be just the thing for everyone, I believe." His clear eyes twinkled at the prospect.  
  
Harry and Ginny glanced at each other. Dumbledore clapped his hands together. "Miss Weasley, you look a little tired. Harry, help her back to Gryffindor Tower, and then come back. I think a meeting is necessary."  
  
Nodding, Harry helped Ginny out of her chair. With a few farewells, the couple left Dumbledore's office and headed back down the stairs to the corridor. Ginny kept her hold on Harry's arm, suppressing a yawn. This was too much excitement for one day.  
  
She heard a chuckle leave Harry's mouth. "You're knackered, aren't you?"  
  
Putting her tongue out at him, she looked up at him. "Well, with you dragging me around the castle like a madman, what do you expect?" she teased, giving his elbow a gentle squeeze.  
  
Slowly, they walked in companionable silence the rest of the way. When they reached the portrait hole, he leaned down and kissed her cheek quickly. "Get some rest. You've got to be ready for our game against Ravenclaw on Saturday," he said softly.  
  
She brushed her mouth against his, smiling up at him. "I will be."  
  
He let go of her arm and backed away, grinning slightly. With a little wave, she gave the password to a dozing Fat Lady and slipped inside the common room, happy to find it deserted. Plopping down in Harry's favorite chair by the hearth, she began to doze off. Her last thoughts were of the proposed party. How would she and Harry survive a party without being able to go together? February was looking quite stressful already.  
  
And it had hardly begun.  
  
~*~  
  
Dumbledore made good on his promise to have a Valentine's Day party for the students. He made the announcement the next day, sending the castle into a cheerful frenzy. The students had less than two weeks to get ready, and all were thankful for the Hogsmeade weekend planned the week before the party; it gave those who had no dress robes a chance to rush down to Gladrags.  
  
Ron continued his silent treatment towards Harry, much to both Ginny and Hermione's displeasure. Hermione was faced with running between her best friend and her boyfriend, pulling her in two directions and sending her to the verge of a nervous breakdown. Ginny had to suffer the stalking tendencies of her brother at all times, leaving her no chance to even talk to Harry in the common room. If Colin hadn't been as kind as to run messages between the two of them, there would have been no communication at all. Colin had no idea what was in the letters; he only thought Ginny and Harry were writing to each other as friends. Ginny decided to leave him in the dark as to their true nature.  
  
The Quidditch team's practices did not suffer because of the rift between their captain and their star Seeker; if anything, they were more productive. Harry seemed possessed by the very devil, going fiercely about his training and attempting more Wronski Feints than usual. Ron was running a perfect record against his Chasers the days leading up to the game against Ravenclaw, saving every single shot that Dean, Katie and Ginny threw at him.  
  
Ginny herself was not up to total performance because of the attack on her the week before, but she gave her brother hell in practice, using every method known to Quidditch to get the Quaffle past him and also performing risky moves on her broom, just to spite him. The rest of the team was highly amused during practices, but held their laughter in check as to not upset the three feuding players.  
  
Ginny awoke the day of the game to see Hermione standing over her, pale and tearful.  
  
"I can't take it anymore! Please, just kill me!" The fretful girl sat on the edge of Ginny's bed, wringing her hands. "Ron will not let me mention Harry's name at all when I'm with him. Harry wants this stupid fight to end, but he refuses to make the first move. I'm stuck going back and forth between those two stubborn idiots, and I can't bloody deal with it anymore!" she finished with a shriek.  
  
Trying not to smile at the distressed girl, Ginny shook her head to clear it of sleep's fog. "I know how you feel. I haven't spoken to Harry in almost a week. Ron hasn't let me out of his sight except for when we have class. This is absolutely ridiculous," she said grumpily, tying up her hair messily with the ribbon under her pillow.  
  
Hermione sniffed, looking very much like she was about to jump out of Ginny's window. "I want to kill both of them."  
  
"Join the club," Ginny said, patting Hermione's arm in comfort. "Maybe if Harry jumps in front of a Bludger for me today, Ron will forgive him," she added with a half-smile.  
  
The older girl let out a tiny laugh, wiping her eyes quickly. "We can only hope for another rogue Bludger, right?" She sobered quickly, sighing. "Why do they always have to do this to each other?"  
  
Ginny shrugged. "Maybe they're testing each other. I don't understand it anymore than you. Boys are a mystery."  
  
Groaning morosely, Hermione buried her head in her hands. "And I get the most complicated ones as my friends. Why me?" she asked with a most un- Hermione-like wail.  
  
"Because you're the only one clever enough to figure them out," Ginny teased.  
  
Hermione scoffed at her words, looking slyly at the younger girl. "You seem to understand Harry much better than I do," she said.  
  
Pursing her lips, Ginny slid out of bed and headed for her wardrobe. "We're friends, that's all. We've shared something that no one else could understand," she said, pulling out some comfortable clothes to wear underneath her Quidditch robes from a drawer.  
  
"He likes you a lot, you know. I think that's part of why Ron's frustrated with him. Ron can't handle you being older than ten," Hermione said thoughtfully.  
  
Ginny closed the drawer with a loud bang, breathing fast. "Well, it's bloody well time for him to start handling it," she said angrily, turning back to Hermione with flashing eyes. "If I want to like Harry and if Harry wants to like me, then Ron will just have to get over it!"  
  
A wide smile spread over Hermione's face as Ginny scrunched her eyes shut, realizing what she had just said. "Oh no..." she moaned.  
  
"You do like him! I knew it! Why don't you tell him? Go to Hogsmeade with him after the game today; I'll distract Ron long enough for you to get away..." Hermione trailed off, looking curiously at Ginny's pale face. "What's wrong?"  
  
Ginny sighed heavily and sat back down on her bed, fingers twisting together nervously. "It isn't that easy, Hermione," she said softly. "Harry doesn't want to have a public relationship, because of everything that has happened and what he thinks will happen. We've...We've talked about it before..." her voice disappeared into silence as tears stung the backs of her eyelids. After all these months, was she going to break down? Was all this secrecy too much for her to handle?  
  
Arms went around her shoulders in a comforting hug. "I'm sorry, Ginny. I should have realized. I just haven't been able to understand why he hasn't done anything with you, and I think I do now," Hermione said gently.  
  
Ginny sniffed quietly and met Hermione's eyes. "You won't tell anyone that I like him, will you?"  
  
Hermione smiled softly. "Of course not. It'll be a secret between friends, all right?" She gave Ginny one last squeeze and stood, glancing at the watch adorning her wrist. "You've got an hour before the game is supposed to start; hurry up and get dressed so we can go eat. Harry's waiting for me in the common room; I need to talk to him before Ron the Prat comes downstairs," she said wryly.  
  
Ginny grinned. "Thanks for listening, Hermione."  
  
Hermione grinned back. "Thanks for stopping me from killing myself," she quipped as she left.  
  
Ginny was quite alone in her dormitory, but somehow it didn't bother her. For the first time, she felt a weight leave her heart. Someone understood. And, for once, it wasn't Harry.  
  
The Gryffindor team won over Ravenclaw by about a hundred points in a hard- won game. Even though her team had been beaten, Cho hadn't seemed angry or unhappy as she shook hands with Harry, smiling cheerfully at him. She had even smiled at Ginny as she and Michael had headed towards Hogsmeade, sending a knowing look between her and Harry. Ginny had smiled back and shaken her head, feeling quite at peace with the Ravenclaw girl.  
  
After the win, Ginny had gone down to Hogsmeade with Colin, Neville, Luna, and Harry, who had joined their group at Colin's clever invitation. It had been an enjoyable afternoon; with Hermione helping out by distracting Ron for almost an hour, Ginny and Harry had the opportunity to talk for the first time in a week. Granted, they could do no more than talk, what with Ginny's friends around the both of them, but as Ginny lay in her bed that night, she felt quite content with herself.  
  
Harry was feeling less than happy with the situation on all fronts, but he refused to talk to Ron first. As he put it to Hermione, "I'm not the one who accused his best friend of trying to kill his sister. He should talk to me first."  
  
The likelihood of that was growing smaller with each passing day, and as the Valentine's Day party approached, Harry had to not only cope with his personal and academic hurdles, but he had to fend off anxious girls trying to get him as a date to the party. Dumbledore was sparing no expense, and since it was widely known around the school that Harry was "single", girls were practically fighting for a chance to go with him. Constantly refusing these girls was easy; giving them a reason why was much harder.  
  
It made him feel better to know that Ginny was being just as bombarded with offers from the boys from all years, or so Hermione told him in the library the day before the dance. It was Friday so many students were off unwinding from the week and preparing for the party. He and Hermione decided to have a quick meeting in the library just for privacy's sake. It was the first time they had been able to talk for almost three days, which was all Ron's fault, and Harry was dying for news about Ginny.  
  
"Oh yes, she is having a time of it this week. All the girls in Gryffindor Tower almost killed her after she turned down Justin Finch-Fletchly yesterday after supper. She won't give any of the boys any reason why; just a polite 'No, thank you,'" Hermione whispered, keeping an eye out for Madam Pince as she leaned across the table to him. To Harry's surprise, Hermione seemed to understand his need for information about Ginny. He wondered if Ginny had said anything to her, or if she was just very clever.  
  
Harry put his head in his hands. "I'm doomed."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and tugged on his elbow. "Come on back to the common room. I need to make sure Ron isn't performing any spells on Ginny," she said, pulling him out of the library.  
  
His brow furrowed. "Spells like what?" he asked warily.  
  
She heaved a sigh. "Oh, something like 'Man Repellant. Repels all testosterone-charged humans from your irate younger sister.' He's been thinking about it."  
  
When Harry entered the common room, he went straight to his chair by the hearth, not looking at a red-faced Ginny, who was being lectured to by Ron over on her seat on the windowsill. Hermione said a quick prayer of patience behind Harry as she passed him to go over to her boyfriend, and he smiled. Poor Hermione. She was a saint in the making.  
  
Ron was talking loud enough for the whole room to hear him. "It's good you don't have a date for this party, you know? I always thought you were a bit young for a boyfriend."  
  
Hermione smacked his shoulder. "Well, you've certainly changed your tune since last year, haven't you Ron? Don't be a prat," she hissed. Harry rolled his eyes. Too late, Hermione.  
  
"What are you going on about?" he asked, looking at his girlfriend incredulously.  
  
Harry watched as Ginny shut her eyes, clenching her fists in frustration, and opened her eyes abruptly. Their gazes locked for a moment, and her mouth thinned. Nodding to herself, she stood as Ron and Hermione began to spar, gathered her books, and started over to Harry's place by the fire. Ron noticed this immediately, reached out, and grabbed her elbow, jerking her to a stop. "Where are you going?" he asked.  
  
"I have to ask Harry something," she replied, voice full of strength.  
  
Ron's gaze narrowed. "What? You can just ask me."  
  
She looked her brother over for a moment. The room was silent. Her eyes went to Harry and she drew herself up, facing Ron. Every bit of her radiated rebellion. "No, I can't. I don't want to ask you, Ron. I want to ask Harry. I want to talk to Harry," she said coolly.  
  
"Why? He practically killed you."  
  
Harry stiffened. Ginny's eyes flashed angrily at her aloof brother. "No, he didn't. Harry is my friend; he wouldn't do something like that. I thought you knew that."  
  
The common room began to sound again in whispers of curiosity. Hermione and Harry watched from different perspectives as Ron tensed, readying himself for battle with his sister. "Ginny, you don't understand. You're too---"  
  
"Don't finish that sentence if you want to continue breathing, Ron," Ginny cut in angrily. "I understand a lot more than you think. I am only a year younger than you, and I have had a more painful life than you in a lot of ways! If I want to be Harry's friend, you can't stop me."  
  
Ron glared at her. "What if he doesn't want to be your friend? You're younger than you think, Ginny."  
  
Harry could see Ginny snap inside, and he unintentionally prayed for mercy on Ron's soul. Hermione winced and turned away from the scene.  
  
Ginny reared back, disbelief filtering through her face. "If Harry didn't want to be my friend, he would still be talking to you, you bloody bastard! He wouldn't be offended that you thought he wanted to kill me because he wouldn't care about me! One of the reasons you don't have his friendship is because he wants to keep mine. He does care about me as a friend, Ron! Why can't you deal with that?" she spat out.  
  
"If he cared about you, he wouldn't have let you take that curse for him!" Ron shouted, getting as red as a tomato.  
  
"He didn't let me take it, Ron! I jumped in front of him to protect him!" Ginny exclaimed in reply, sending the buzzing room into dead silence. Her breathing was hard, her eyes were wild; Harry had never seen her look more alive and passionate. "Yes, I jumped in front of him so he wouldn't be hit! He didn't want me to, but I did anyway!"  
  
Ron gaped at her, jaw completely slack. Ginny glared furiously at him, turned sharply on her heel, and went straight over to Harry. Without putting up a fight, he let her grab his elbow and drag him out of the common room, a small smile on his face. She didn't let go of him until they were outside in the lightly falling snow, right by the doors to the entrance hall. Harry grinned down at her. "Where are we going?" he asked quietly.  
  
"To the lake," was her reply.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"To make a hole in it," she snapped, taking a few deep breaths in her struggle to calm down.  
  
Shaking his head in amusement, he took her hand in his and led her to a little alcove near the doors. "It's nice to see you, too," he said lightly, pulling her shivering form to his frame.  
  
Finally, she seemed to realize that she was alone with Harry for the first time in almost two weeks, and she curled up to his warmth, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I'm sorry. I can't believe I did that," she said with a small laugh, voice muffled by his chest.  
  
Dropping a kiss on the top of her head, he smiled and inhaled the scent of her hair. Merlin, he had missed having her in his arms. "I can. You're incredible," he murmured.  
  
She looked up, a tiny smile on her face. "I missed you," she whispered. "I just couldn't take it anymore."  
  
Leaning down, he kissed her for the first time in two weeks. Her arms came up around his neck, and he tangled his fingers in her hair, angling her head to deepen the kiss. It was bliss; it was joy; it was his other half.  
  
It was the definition of Valentine's Day.  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Sorry this has taken so long, folks. This took a whole lot of head- banging and reading to get done, so I hope you enjoy. Please read and review and, as always, a huge thank you to my beta Anne, who is a living goddess. ^^ 


	8. Eight

Valentine's Day dawned clear and bright against the light dusting of snow that had fallen the night before. The castle was filled with a sense of excitement as students anticipated the coming of the party that night, throwing all homework to the side to focus on the preparations. Most of the student body was cheerful and gay, ticking off the minutes until the party was to begin.  
  
Most of them, anyway.  
  
Ginny wasn't speaking to Ron. Hermione wasn't speaking to Ron. Ron wasn't speaking to Harry, Ginny, or Hermione. Harry seemed preoccupied and brooding for most of the day.  
  
It was just grand, Ginny mused as she dug around in her trunk for her dress robes. Hermione was miserable about being angry at Ron, but she was resolved to not speak with him until he had some sort of apology for both Ginny and Harry. Harry had barely spoken to her at all, keeping himself in his dormitory for most of the day. She reckoned it was just the thought of going to a party without being able to take her; that was what was making her morose as her fingers slid against the cool silk of her robes. Pulling the robes out, she shook the dust from the fabric and held them up to her appraising eye.  
  
Oh, damn.  
  
Forgetting she hadn't worn them for two years, Ginny simply assumed that the robes would still fit. She hadn't accounted for the fact that she had been a few months shy of fourteen then and now she was nearly sixteen. Her figure, which hadn't been fully developed when she had bought the robes, had blossomed over the past few years as usual for a teenage girl.  
  
The robes were too small.  
  
Ginny let out a little wail of despair and flung the robes to the floor in anger, sagging to her bed. Of course. Bloody wonderful. Why would anything go right for her this month when she dealt with turmoil so well? Damn.  
  
What could she do? Cursing herself for her own stupidity, she rubbed her pounding temples and scrounged her head for an idea. She didn't know the spells to Transfigure the fabric to her size; that kind of work was saved until seventh year. Not knowing any seventh-years well enough to ask for their assistance, she felt completely helpless. Was there no saving grace for her?  
  
There was a knock on the door. Ginny looked up, sighing unhappily. "Come in," she said grumpily.  
  
The door opened and Hermione slipped inside, smiling slightly. She already had her robes of navy blue on, Ginny noticed sourly, and her hair was smoothed and straightened. All she lacked was a light brush of make-up. "Hi, Ginny. Why aren't you ready?" she asked, closing the door behind her.  
  
Ginny crossed her arms over her chest, jerking her head towards the crumpled fabric on the floor by her bed. "My robes don't fit, and now I can't go," she muttered.  
  
Hermione made a quiet sound of sympathy as she picked up the robes and held them up. "Oh, Ginny. I'm sorry. They are very nice, too. You would look so lovely in white," she said, furrowing her brow. "Maybe if..."  
  
Ginny looked up at Hermione with unabashed hope. "Do you know the spells to fit it to me?"  
  
The older girl shook her head slowly. "I've read about them, but I've never tried them myself. I don't know anyone who does, either."  
  
Slumping, Ginny frowned unhappily. "Oh."  
  
"Don't you have anything else, Ginny? Or, your roommates..." Hermione trailed off at the despondent look on Ginny's face. "I guess not."  
  
Ginny let out a small moan and flopped onto her back, fists clenched in frustration. "How fair is this? Life is just wonderful, isn't it? Ron isn't talking to Harry; Harry isn't talking to Ron; you and I aren't talking to Ron; The Ministry of Magic is trying to undermine Dumbledore; and my bloody dress robes don't fit!" she shrieked, breath coming fast and hard.  
  
A gentle hand rested on her shoulder. "It's not the end of the world, honestly. Dumbledore knows what he's doing, and there will be more parties to attend. You don't have a date, anyway," Hermione said soothingly.  
  
Another problem Ginny was having trouble with: no date. She desperately wanted to go with Harry, but for some strange reason he hadn't said a word to her about it. They weren't even going as friends, which was entirely possible in her point of view. Why didn't he see it?  
  
Stomach knotting, she shut her eyes. Maybe he just didn't want to go with her. He had hardly spoken to her since last night.  
  
There was a soft knock on the door. "Ginny, I thought I heard you ranting. Is everything all right?"  
  
The voice of Katie Bell came to Ginny's ears, and she sat up on her elbows, opening her eyes as Hermione sat beside her. "You can come in, Katie," she said tiredly.  
  
The older Chaser entered immediately, glowing in robes of forest green that accented her eyes. Her hair was tied back into a sleek ponytail with a simple ribbon, adding a quiet charm to her whole appearance. She looked wonderful, and Ginny was dying of jealousy.  
  
Katie smiled quizzically, eyes traveling to the robes in Hermione's hand. "Why aren't you ready yet, Ginny?" she asked.  
  
Sighing heavily, Hermione held up Ginny's robes. "Too small."  
  
Ginny frowned as Katie's face lit with sympathy. "Oh, dear. Let me see those," she said, reaching out and taking the robes from Hermione's outstretched hand. "They are lovely, Ginny."  
  
"So I've heard," Ginny said petulantly, crossing her arms.  
  
"Well, I could fix them to fit you, if you'd like. My mother is an excellent seamstress; she taught me the basics of everything," Katie said cheerfully, smiling at Ginny.  
  
Hermione's mouth creased into a grin as Ginny looked at her teammate in blatant joy, a complete turnabout from only a minute ago. Why hadn't she thought of Katie? Typical hysterical Weasley reaction; forget the closest solution. "Oh, would you?" she asked, a note of pleading in her voice.  
  
Katie laughed lightly, pulling her wand out of a hidden pocket of her robes. "Slip it on as best as you can and we'll see what I can do for you," she said, handing the robes off to their ecstatic owner.  
  
Shedding her school robes and jeans as quickly as possible, Ginny pulled the tight silk over her undergarments, enlisting the help of an amused Hermione to get the fabric down her form. Sucking in her stomach, Ginny held her breath, struggling not to pop out of the stretching seams as Katie walked around her, eyeing her critically. Her head grew light with lack of oxygen, and she shut her eyes, gritting her teeth. Oh, the pains of beauty. "Katie..." she wheezed.  
  
"Got it!" came the triumphant cry from the seventh-year, and with a quick set of words, Ginny was able to breathe. She inhaled deeply, thanking Katie profusely as she opened her eyes to look in the full-length mirror that belonged to one of her roommates.  
  
Her jaw went slack at the sight of her form.  
  
"That's gorgeous, Katie!" Hermione exclaimed. "Very good use of your talents."  
  
Katie beamed. "Thanks, Hermione. It helps that Ginny is so pretty. The white complements her skin tone, doesn't it?"  
  
Ginny smoothed out the form-fitting robes, looking aghast at her reflection. Katie had done a marvelous job, really. They were just so...so...  
  
"Bit snug, don't you think?" she asked casually, struggling to take a full breath without having her breasts pop out. She actually had no idea her curves were so pronounced.  
  
"You have the figure to pull something like this off, Ginny. It looks wonderful!" Katie proclaimed, smiling widely at the younger girl.  
  
Nodding, Hermione winked slyly. "I'm sure there will be one or two people who will be extremely impressed." She grinned and reached for Ginny's ponytail. "Time for your hair!"  
  
With Katie and Hermione's assistance, Ginny was completely ready in time to go down to the Great Hall. The wedding ring was visible, but Ginny had explained it away quite calmly as an heirloom from her great-grandmother. Her hair fell around her face and shoulders in soft ringlets, and her face was light on the makeup side. Even though she was having a bit of trouble breathing normally in the robes, Ginny was quite happy with her appearance. Her spirits lifting, she joined Katie and Hermione on their way down to the Great Hall.  
  
Her brother George was waiting by the staircase, looking impeccably clean in his dark blue robes. Katie's eyes brightened when she saw him, and Ginny smiled as he held out his hand to Katie when the three girls reached him. "You look lovely, Katie," he said. She blushed happily.  
  
Turning his gaze to the other two, he smiled a hello at Hermione and came to his only sister. Shock flew across his face as he took in her appearance. "Bloody hell! Ginny, you look..." he trailed off, clearly dumbstruck.  
  
With a grin, she squeezed his arm. "Nice to see you clean up so nice, too," she said cheekily. "Let's go. I think I hear the Weird Sisters playing already."  
  
Professor Lupin was standing outside the doors of the Great Hall, conversing with a red-haired Tonks, when they reached the doors. He stopped talking quite quickly, looking a bit red in the face. Tonks, who was blushing suspiciously in Ginny's opinion, let out a squeal of delight when she saw Ginny. "Wotcher, Ginny! Look at you. You're gorgeous," she said as she embraced Ginny quickly.  
  
Lupin smiled and reached out to take Ginny's hand in greeting. His eyes found the ring around her neck, and Ginny felt his hand tense in hers. She met his eyes, trying to read his expression. Slowly, he gave her a slight smile, a knowing look in his eyes. Somehow, Ginny had a good feeling she and Lupin would be having a talk in the coming days.  
  
"Going in, are you? So are we," Tonks chattered as Lupin held the door open for the group as they entered the hall. "I'm not here on assignment, though. I just came for a bit of fun. My first bit of holiday since the summer," she finished, casting an odd look at Lupin.  
  
Ginny's eyes narrowed and she was about to ask Tonks what was going on until Ron's voice calling to George grabbed her attention. She looked in his direction and saw him standing by a table of punch...Near Harry.  
  
Her heart leapt into her throat as she met Harry's eyes. Looking especially handsome in his green robes, he had her insides doing cartwheels in expectation. He was the most gorgeous man she had ever seen in her life. With the way his burning gaze was traveling her form, she was melting into a wildfire of feeling. And he hadn't even touched her yet.  
  
~*~  
  
When Harry entered the Great Hall by himself, he was blown away by the amount of decoration and preparation that he was surrounded by. Little cupid-like faeries fluttered from place to place, following the trail of red and white lights that glittered in mid-air throughout the hall. A stage was set up where the professors' table usually was, decorated in sparkling silver, and there were tables of food and drink set up everywhere. A large space had been set aside for dancing, right below the moonlight shining down from the enchanted ceiling. The professors had really knocked themselves out for the students' benefit.  
  
He was cheered slightly when he saw the decoration, lifting himself from the sullen stupor he had been wallowing in all day. A vision of Voldemort had kept him up most of the night, dampening his mood the whole day through. It was all he had the mind to think about, especially since it concerned Ginny. He had even avoided Ginny a bit, just to make sure she didn't catch onto anything. It was not a good idea to have her find out Voldemort knew that she was the girl who had opened the Chamber, and that he wanted to use her to his advantage.  
  
But Harry even forgot about that when he had been in the Great Hall for a few minutes. He was quietly drinking some pumpkin juice when someone had tapped him on the shoulder. Turning, he almost fell over in shock when he saw Ron surveying him without a sign of hatred in his gaze.  
  
Ron cocked his head to one side. "She jumped in front of you, did she?" he asked.  
  
Harry set his goblet down and faced Ron fully. "I didn't want her to. I was trying to shield her," he replied tonelessly.  
  
Ron seemed to ponder this for a moment before nodding slowly. He hesitated for a brief second, and then held out his hand. "I'm sorry."  
  
Hearing the complete sincerity in his voice, Harry took Ron's hand. It would be a while until they were back to normal, but this was a beginning. "So I am. I didn't mean to for her to get hurt."  
  
"I know." Ron's eyes traveled past him to the entrance of the Great Hall, and a grin crossed his face. He released Harry's hand. "George is here with Katie and Hermione. George!" he called over the buzz that was beginning to escalate as more students poured in.  
  
Harry turned to face the direction of the door, searching for his friends. His eyes fell on a girl clothed in white. Brown eyes clashed with his green gaze. Heart stopping, he watched as the girl inhaled, red curls moving slightly with the breath.  
  
It was Ginny.  
  
Sweet Merlin, was she wearing anything underneath those robes?  
  
Heat pooled in his abdomen as he let his eyes rake her form, taking in all her curves as his head grew light. Was it human for a woman to look that good? Was it legal to wear robes that were that tight?  
  
Merlin, he hoped so.  
  
Muscles tight with wanting, he struggled to get air into his failing lungs. He was completely overwhelmed by the desire racing through his veins, not unlike what he felt back on Christmas, when he had given Ginny the wedding ring.  
  
The ring.  
  
He could see the ring sparkling against her creamy skin, and his heart dropped like a stone. There had to be a reason she was wearing the ring in public. What if someone recognized it as his mother's?  
  
Lupin was looking at him from the corner of his eye, silently asking for information. Harry smiled weakly, shaking his head subtly. How could he explain this to Lupin right now?  
  
Suddenly, she was walking towards him and he didn't give a damn about the ring. Every time she moved, he noticed something new about her body. The robes were tailor-made; he thanked whoever made them silently as the group by the door came over to him and Ron. Hermione smiled at him and nodded towards Ginny before looking into Ron's gaze. George and Katie said a quick hello before walking off to the dance floor. Soon it was just the four of them, watching each other in silence.  
  
Harry had never felt so uncomfortable in his life. Ginny was breathing quickly and shallowly only a few feet away from him, and he could barely contain his need to ravish her right there. Ron and Hermione seemed to be having a silent conversation with their eyes, most likely about him. Hermione raised her eyebrows at her boyfriend. "What's going on?" she asked coolly.  
  
Swallowing, Ron nodded at Harry. "Just talking to Harry for a bit. D'you want to dance with me?" he asked, smiling tentatively. Harry had to grin, seeing Hermione's cold shoulder melt as she realized what Ron had done.  
  
Hermione nodded quickly, a bright smile on her face. Ron smiled slightly at Harry. "Going to go show her how to dance," he joked, elicting a quiet chuckle from Harry, a playful hit on the shoulder from Hermione, and complete chilliness from Ginny. Hermione touched Ginny's shoulder as she passed with Ron, and then it was just him and Ginny.  
  
Alone.  
  
Just seeing the way the soft light seemed to attach to every part of her made his blood boil with need. He had never felt this way about anyone in his whole life; not even the desire he had felt for Ginny at Christmas could hold a candle to what was pulsing through him at this moment. Staring at her, he didn't care who noticed how his eyes lingered.  
  
Her cheeks went a soft red as their gazes met. "Hi, Harry," she said, smiling shyly.  
  
Every fiber of his being wanted to reach out and trace the curve of her neck all the way down to...  
  
He jerked slightly, feeling heat rush to his face. Merlin, please don't let her notice how I'm reacting to her, he prayed as he cleared his throat. "Evening, Ginny. You look..." he trailed off, mouth going dry. What could he say to express himself without sounding completely idiotic?  
  
There was only the truth.  
  
"You look beautiful," he said sincerely, watching her face light up in happiness. His heart lifted as the smile on her lips grew to include her dark eyes.  
  
She took a tentative step closer to him, looking up from beneath her dark eyelashes. Heart pounding erratically, he struggled not to pull her into his arms, just to feel her curves against his form. "I thought you were angry with me or something like that," she said softly.  
  
Confusion flooded through him. Why couldn't he remember anything before the past five minutes? "Why?"  
  
"Because you didn't talk to anyone, including me, all day. Are you all right Harry? You look a bit warm," Ginny said, gazing closer into his face.  
  
It was all he could take. With a quick look around them, Harry grabbed her hand and pulled her into a shadowed alcove, pressing her against the wall with his weight. His mouth descended to the curve of her neck, causing her to gasp. "I'm an idiot. I'm sorry for not talking to you," he said against her skin, voice hoarse with wanting.  
  
Her hands grasped his shoulders as she shuddered underneath his touch. "It's ok, Harry. What in the world has gotten into you?" she asked breathlessly as his lips followed the trail of the chain of her necklace.  
  
He couldn't answer her; all he could do was lift her up in his arms and kiss her, taking the breath from her. Hands roaming against the silken feel of her robes, he didn't remember anything in the world other than the girl wrapped up in his arms. Anything else was beyond comprehension. For someone who wasn't particularly fond of Valentine's Day, he certainly was enjoying it now.  
  
Suddenly, she stiffened under his touch, and her hands pushed him away, almost knocking him over with the force. Regaining his breath, he ran a hand through his hair as he stared at her, completely dumbfounded. What had he done?  
  
All he could see of her face was a sliver of her cheek; her hair provided a curtain for her. "I'm sorry, Harry. I need to go talk to George," she muttered, voice breaking. Before he could say a word, she was gone in a swirl of white and red, walking quickly to her brother's side.  
  
Harry shut his eyes tightly, smacking himself mentally. What the hell was wrong with him? Was he mad? He had practically forced himself upon her only a minute ago. No wonder she had run away from him.  
  
But she had been just as forward as he... Maybe it was something else. Harry groaned inwardly. Something else to agonize over. Bloody wonderful.  
  
"What are you doing back here, Harry?"  
  
Harry's eyes opened with a jolt at the sound of Lupin's curious voice, and he turned to see the professor standing by him, and odd look in his eyes. Sighing, Harry shrugged helplessly. "Haven't got a clue. Wondering why girls don't come with an instruction booklet," he said, voice laced with sarcasm.  
  
A ghost of a smile flitted across Lupin's face, and he came closer to Harry. "All men wonder that at some point in their lives, so don't feel alone. What have you done now?"  
  
"I don't know," Harry replied simply, feeling quite miserable at the thought of Ginny ignoring him again.  
  
"Ah." The two men stood in silence for a moment before Lupin spoke again. "I saw Ginny has your mother's ring."  
  
Harry glanced at Lupin, gauging his face. "I gave it to her for Christmas. Dumbledore said he found it."  
  
"What does it mean, Harry?" Lupin asked, gazing at his pupil carefully.  
  
"I...I'm not sure, actually," Harry confessed hesitantly. "I wanted her to have it because...well..."  
  
Lupin halted him with a quick hand gesture. "I think I understand Harry. As long as you're not engaged, I think it's a good gift."  
  
Engaged? Harry's stomach knotted painfully. Merlin, he was barely an adult! How could he be thinking of marriage? Was that how Ginny saw the ring? For his sake, he hoped not. He could barely grasp the meaning of love, let alone a love string enough for a commitment like marriage. In fact, he still didn't understand love at all.  
  
Still, he mused as he watched Ginny talk with her brother from afar, that didn't mean he didn't catch wisps of it from time to time.  
  
Merlin, what was he going to do now?  
  
~*~  
  
Ginny was frightfully on edge as time plodded away, the party seeming as if it would go on until her next lifetime. She avoided Harry's general area, which was more difficult than she thought it would be, considering he was practically looking underneath the tables trying to find her. Normally, she wouldn't mind being found. But not after what she had seen.  
  
It had come on quite abruptly; one minute she had been kissing Harry and melting in his arms as he did the wildest things to her, and the next minute she was watching him being tortured by Wormtail, Voldemort looking on and speaking to her as if she was right there: You fulfilled your purpose, Virginia. Tom is proud...  
  
Tom.  
  
She took a shuddering breath, hugging herself as she stood by a pillar, watching her happy classmates dance and drink. Did Voldemort know she was the girl who had opened the Chamber? Did he remember her as the girl who adored had him?  
  
Feeling nauseous, she shut her eyes. The nightmares had stopped after the winter holiday was over, but she feared discovery of her secret; Tom, who was always inside her, could use her against Harry. It was the thing she dreaded the most. One morning, she would wake up, and not remember what she had done the night before.  
  
"Is Potter bored with his whore already, Weasley? Or are you looking for new customers?"  
  
Ginny whirled around to find Draco Malfoy watching her, an insolent smirk on his face. He stepped closer to her, eyes raking down her form. "You might have promise if you talk to the right people. Want a fellow madam to owl? She'll teach you all the right tricks, and you can finally make some money for you family," he drawled.  
  
"Sod off, you bastard. Go see if Daddy hasn't gone insane in Azkaban yet. Send him our regards, will you?" she hissed, chin lifting defiantly.  
  
The smirk was wiped off his face, and he reached out to grab her arm, holding her tight enough to leave a bruise. "Don't think I don't know why you hide, Weasley. Afraid Tom is going to pop into the Great Hall?"  
  
She gazed at him in horror, struggling to pull away from him. He sneered down at her, releasing her and wiping his hand on his robes. "You thought it was a secret, didn't you? Don't you know why people look at you? They want to see the Mudblood-killer," he said, smiling maliciously. "Tom misses you. Don't think he won't find you again," he added as he walked away, black robes trailing behind him.  
  
Breathing shallowly, Ginny struggled not to cry as the memories of her first year swirled around her, drowning her...  
  
Not Harry...Please not Harry...  
  
'He doesn't like you, Virginia. Don't you want him to suffer for not seeing you?'  
  
Not like this. Please, Tom. Don't hurt him!  
  
'Shut up, you stupid girl! I am the one who loves you! Not him!'  
  
Not Harry...  
  
"There ye be, Miss Weasley! Haven't seen ye in a good six months!"  
  
In shock, Ginny looked up to see Hagrid looming over her, a beaming smile on his large face. She ducked her head, feeling red with shame. Hagrid, who had gone to Azkaban because of her...because of Tom...  
  
"Are ye all right, Ginny?" Hagrid asked, placing a warm hand on her shoulder.  
  
She jumped at his touch, nodding vigorously. "Yes, Hagrid. Did you just get back?" she asked quickly.  
  
The half-giant gave her a toothy grin. "Yes, I did. Bin a long trek, it has. But it's good ter be home," he said cheerfully.  
  
Ginny smiled weakly, looking behind Hagrid to see Harry standing a few feet away, an unreadable look in his eyes. She glanced back up at Hagrid. "I've got to go, Hagrid. Are you staying for long?"  
  
"Be here for a bit, I'd say. Come on down to the hut for a cuppa, eh?" he asked jovially.  
  
She nodded and said a quick farewell before practically sprinting across the Great Hall to the doors. After leaving the party behind, she raced down corridors and stairs, searching for somewhere to cry in peace. Glancing around quickly, she ducked into Professor Lupin's classroom and closed the door behind her. There she let her tears fall as she sank to her knees, letting the memories overrun her.  
  
~*~  
  
Harry was perplexed by Ginny's behavior at the party, but within a day or two she was back to her normal self, smiling and cheerful. She never mentioned the night of the party, so he didn't either.  
  
Ron had completely changed his behavior towards Harry, reverting back to being his best friend. Harry was relieved to have his friend back, knowing that whatever had happened could now be forgiven. Besides, he didn't have the heart to stay mad at Ron when he was sincere in his apology.  
  
February drifted into March, and while Harry's academic and friend problems seemed to be solved, another more perplexing matter came into his view: Ginny's birthday was at the end of the month.  
  
What could he get her that she would appreciate? It was a question he could hardly ask Ron or Hermione; much too obvious. He had a strange feeling that Lupin might not be much of a help, being that he didn't seem to have too much experience with women. It just didn't seem in the older man's character. Although, there were some interesting rumors going around about him and Nymphadora Tonks...  
  
This was Harry's train of thought during a Qudditch practice in mid-March during a chilling rain. Shaking the water from his hair, he swung around the pitch, searching for the Snitch as Ron yelled out his commands over the wind. No spot of sunlight peeked through the dark sky, giving the day a very gloomy atmosphere. It matched Harry's mood very well.  
  
"Ron! We've been out here for an hour! We're all going to get sick if you don't let us go inside," Katie Bell shouted as she attempted to shoot the Quaffle. She was soaked to the bone and shivering madly.  
  
Ron performed a Starfish-and-Stick to save the shot, and glared at his mulish Chaser. "Come on, Bell! You can handle a bit more!"  
  
Katie crossed her arms stubbornly. "Maybe I can, but Ginny can't," she said, jerking her head towards the red-head in question.  
  
Harry stopped his search for the Snitch and took a closer look at Ginny as she pulled her broom up to Katie. Yes, she did look a bit ill. He could see the dark circles under her eyes, the wan look to her skin. It looked as if she hadn't got a good night's of rest in a few weeks. Worry overran his caution, and he flew over to her.  
  
Ron looked over his sister carefully. "All right," he said with a sigh. "You're right."  
  
Ginny gaped indignantly. "What? Don't be ridiculous, Ron. I'm fine," she protested, raindrops sliding down her face.  
  
"Bollocks. You look like hell, Gin. Practice is over! Go on in," Ron called to the others, flying towards the ground swiftly.  
  
Harry hung back, moving next to Ginny as she descended. "Ginny, what's wrong?" he asked quietly.  
  
She shot him a glance. "I'm fine. I'm just having some trouble sleeping, that's all. Too much studying for O.W.L.s," she said shortly, sliding off her broom and striding towards the entrance to Hogwarts before he could say another word. He landed and watched her walk away from him for a moment, puzzled no longer.  
  
Trouble sleeping?  
  
Nightmares.  
  
Spurred on by concern, Harry ran after her, catching her just as she entered. "Are you having nightmares?" he asked quietly, pulling her into a darkened stairwell.  
  
Ginny twisted away from him, looking darkly at him. "I don't see how that's any of your business."  
  
"What do you mean? Of course it's my business!" Why was she being so unreasonable?  
  
Incredulity showed on her face and she crossed her arms over her chest. "Oh really? Then tell me, Harry: Where do you disappear to every Tuesday night?" she inquired hotly, eyes blazing.  
  
Faltering, Harry gazed at her silently as she waited for his answer. Why didn't he think she wouldn't have caught on to his constant disappearance? Judging on her appearance, she wasn't going to take any more lies from him. Opening his mouth, he just let the words fly. "I'm getting Occlumancy lessons from Dumbledore to keep Voldemort from seeing into my mind, all right?" he replied stiffly.  
  
All emotion fled from her face except for alarm. "What?"  
  
He sighed impatiently. "Exactly what I said. How do you think I saw your dad's attack from last year? Voldemort has a connection to my mind, and I'm learning Occlumancy so I can block him."  
  
Horror flitted into her eyes. "Oh no," she whispered. "I'm sorry." Her face grew as pale as a ghost, and she looked unsteady on her feet.  
  
Reaching out, Harry steadied her with a hand on her waist. "Sorry for what? It's not a bad thing," he said gently, leaning down to kiss her forehead.  
  
Before he could touch her with his lips she was out of his reach, shaking like a leaf. "I'm sorry. I need to go, Harry," she said weakly, turning and running down the hall. Harry watched her disappear with complete shock. What the hell...?  
  
"Potter!"  
  
Harry grimaced at the sneering tone and turned to see Snape watching him, lip curling in distaste. "The Headmaster would like to see you in his office," Snape continued, taking in Harry's soaked form with an appalled gaze.  
  
Harry nodded curtly and walked off, hearing Snape's footsteps behind him. Hate boiled in his veins, but he said nothing as they walked towards Dumbledore's office. When they reached the gargoyle, Harry gave the password and raced up the steps, walking into the office without preamble. He stopped in the doorway at the sight that met him.  
  
Mad-Eye Moody, Tonks, Mr. Weasley, Professor McGonagall and Lupin all stood in the office by Dumbledore's seat, waiting silently for Harry's arrival. Harry moved in to let Snape by and went straight to his usual seat. "Evening, Professor," he said, addressing Dumbledore. "What's going on?"  
  
Moody gave him a cool once-over before nodding at Dumbledore. The headmaster sighed. "The Dementors went back to Azkaban, Harry. But not to rejoin us."  
  
In his mind, Harry could already sense what was coming. He had seen it in Draco Malfoy's cocky demeanor for the past few weeks, the murmurs from the Slytherin House. He was prepared for the news.  
  
"Harry," Mr. Weasley spoke up. "The Dementors raided Azkaban in You-Know- Who's orders. There was a jailbreak." He sounded very tired. Harry could only imagine what Mrs. Weasley must be going through.  
  
"How many dead?" Harry asked calmly.  
  
Moody closed his eyes for a moment as Tonks let out a shuddering breath. Out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw Lupin put a gentle arm on her shoulder. "Nine Aurors, no prisoners. Kingsley Shacklebolt was killed by Lucius Malfoy," Moody said gruffly.  
  
"So now Voldemort is at his full strength," Snape said from behind Harry.  
  
Mr. Weasley nodded. "So it would seem."  
  
"Information has already indicated of plans for attacks on Muggle-borns," Tonks said.  
  
Harry gazed at Dumbledore. "What about the Ministry?"  
  
Dumbledore met his eyes and let out a slow sigh, looking ancient as he answered. "Fudge has been completely undermined by bribes and lies fed to him by supporters of the Malfoys. We must get him out of office so we can use the Ministry to help defeat Voldemort. I will be going to the Wizengamot in a few days to make the final arrangements," he said.  
  
Harry looked around the room, determination filling his blood. "What can I do?"  
  
Silence filled the room as the adults gazed from one person to another, all contemplating his words. Harry waited impatiently for someone to answer him, resolution soaring through him. He would do something! Or else he would go mad...  
  
"Harry, have you had any dreams of Voldemort?" Dumbledore asked gently.  
  
Shaking his head, Harry looked at the headmaster. "None, sir. Either he's given up on my mind or the Occlumancy is working."  
  
Lupin went over and put a hand on Harry's shoulder. "You'll be starting training in fighting techniques with me next Monday, so you're ready," he said softly.  
  
"Keep alert, Potter, especially around schoolmates," Moody added.  
  
"Until we find more concrete plans, Harry, no one can do anything. We must all be patient," Dumbledore finished, giving Harry a kindly, if weary, smile.  
  
Harry nodded, feeling completely involved as the others began to talk around him. Finally he was a part of something. Finally he was useful.  
  
~*~  
  
'Virginia, open up...'  
  
"No. Don't touch me..."  
  
'I can feel you, Virginia. Surely you can feel me inside of you. You want me to come out. Let me into your mind.'  
  
He was clawing at the walls of her mind, struggling to glean anything from her. She fought to keep him down, fought to make him leave her be. It didn't work. It never had.  
  
'So...Occlumancy, Virginia? Harry is a clever boy, isn't he? But not clever enough to keep it a secret from you. Doesn't he know I'm still here?'  
  
This was agony; Flesh-burning, heart-tearing agony that would never let her be. She couldn't stop him; he was seeping into her mind once more, this time in a much more dangerous incarnation.  
  
'I'm always here, Virginia. I can see everything you see. Feel everything you feel. Hear anything you hear.  
  
'I know everything...'  
  
Screams ripped from her throat as she shot up in bed, sweat dripping from her brow. Her curious and frightful roommates were staring at her from the sides of her bed with petrified expressions. She stared at them all in turn, hearing the commotion rising in the different dormitories in Gryffindor Tower. Her skin was on fire; she felt like she was burning in the fires of hell. All of her mind boiled down to two conflicting, warring words:  
  
Harry. Tom.  
  
Bolting from her room, she didn't bother to pull on her dressing-gown as she ran down to the common room and out the portrait hole, not hearing Hermione's frantic calls to her as she left. Her feet took a path all their own, and she only followed, tears running down her face and soaking her skin. She skidded to a halt at a familiar stone gargoyle, and she inhaled sharply, shaking with unshed tears.  
  
What was the bloody password?  
  
Dropping to her knees, she smacked her fists against the immovable statue. "Please! Please let me in! I can't do this alone! I want this to stop," she sobbed, resting her forehead against the cold stone.  
  
Sobbing in silence for a moment, she suddenly felt a cool hand on her shoulder. She looked up through bloodshot, teary eyes and saw Professor Snape muttering the password to the gargoyle. Ginny leapt to her feet as it moved to one side, and she glanced at Snape, shame filling her. "Thank you, sir," she whispered thickly.  
  
"Go on in, Miss Weasley. Your followers shall be here soon, and I'm sure you'd rather speak to the headmaster in private," Snape said stoically, turning and walking away.  
  
Without a second glance she rushed up the stairs, hearing the gargoyle slide back into position with relief. The door wasn't open, but she was so distressed that knocking didn't occur to her. Bursting into the office, she was met with the startled gazes of Lupin, Dumbledore, and McGonagall. Tears still falling from her eyes, she went to the seated Dumbledore.  
  
"He can read me, sir! Tom can still read me!"  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Please read and review. Harry Potter doesn't belong to me. Many thanks to Anne. 


	9. Nine

As Ginny told Dumbledore, Lupin, and McGonagall of the entries into her mind, the three professors sat back and stared at her in a mixture of shock and horror. Even the unshakable headmaster seemed quite disturbed over the events in Ginny's tale. When she was finished, Ginny collapsed into the seat Lupin had helped her into, shivering with fear and exhaustion. Her secret was out; she could only hope there was something to help her.  
  
The three professors looked from one another before Dumbledore spoke. "So Tom is able to read your mind?" he asked softly.  
  
Ginny nodded. "It's not just the memory of Tom, either. It really is him, in his present form," she added as an afterthought.  
  
At this, Lupin looked up suddenly, eyes wide. "This is the real Voldemort? Not just a memory?"  
  
"Voldemort knows about Harry's Occlumancy?" McGonagall whispered.  
  
Dumbledore seemed to sag, and Ginny's heart fell to her feet. "Well, now he knows why he hasn't been able to glean any information from his link with Harry. The question is, does he know anything else?" he asked, eyes meeting Ginny's.  
  
Shaking her head rapidly, Ginny sought to placate her teachers. "No, I don't know anything else, honestly! I made Harry tell me about his Occlumancy lessons because I was angry. My brothers don't tell me anything about their work, either."  
  
And she had never been so glad of it before.  
  
The headmaster nodded, and silence fell over the office. Portraits were quietly murmuring to each other on the walls, and Ginny had never felt so scrutinized or judged in her life. Her head was pounding, her eyes were rough with the remains of her tears, and she was dead tired. Only the prevalent fear of dreams kept her from nodding off right in her chair.  
  
Finally, Lupin spoke up. "Should she have Occlumancy lessons, then?" he asked Dumbledore.  
  
The old wizard took a long look at Ginny before shaking his head, stunning all three of his visitors. "Occlumancy will not work with Miss Weasley. It protects the mind from the outside. It has no affect on something that is a part of the soul," he said slowly.  
  
It was a long moment before Ginny could speak. "What can I do?" she pleaded, face pale with grief. Was she a menace to the cause? Was she a danger to Harry?  
  
"I will tell you the truth, Miss Weasley; I don't know what to do about this. I had thought..."Dumbledore trailed off, looking grave and unhappy at this turn of events.  
  
Bitterness swelled inside her as she completed his sentence for him. "You thought that stabbing a Basilisk fang into a book was the end of my troubles, just as everyone else did. I never led you to believe otherwise; why should I?" she asked, voice small but steely. Her heart was collapsing. It was the end of her and Harry, she could tell. The one thing she wanted was being snatched away after she had had a taste of it. It was the worst feeling in the world.  
  
Dumbledore looked kindly at her, and the tightness in her chest lessened slightly. "I admit I did think that. I am sorry for what you have suffered over the years, Miss Weasley. My time will be spent thinking of a way to help you, I promise," he said gently.  
  
"What about Harry?" Ginny asked quietly, tears rising into her already burning eyes.  
  
The adults glanced at each other in turn. Lupin sighed silently. "Is she a danger to him?" he said to Dumbledore quietly. Ginny still heard him, but she felt no anger. All she felt was a deepening sense of heartbreak surrounding her.  
  
"I think we should see about Harry, Miss Weasley. I do not like to dictate the lives of my students. It is a decision you must make of your own accord, whether you are a risk to him," Dumbledore told her, smiling slightly. "In the meantime, please come back to my office next Friday. I shall return from the Wizengamot then, and we will discuss your situation in full detail."  
  
"You look tired, Miss Weasley. Please go back to the Tower. You've been here for almost an hour; I'm sure whatever disturbance you caused has died down," McGonagall commented quietly.  
  
Ginny nodded, pushing herself shakily from her chair and nodding to the three professors before leaving the office. It was in the silent hallway by the gargoyle where she finally let her tears win her over. Salt water drew trails on her skin as she made her way slowly down the corridors, leaning against the wall as her despair overwhelmed her, combined with her exhaustion. Life had no meaning as she walked along the icy floor in her bare feet. Deep inside, she knew she could be the cause of something horrible for Harry and the Order. Inside her, she felt him stir, laughing madly at her sorrow.  
  
'Poor Virginia. Nowhere to turn. Nowhere to hide. How can you hide from your own soul?'  
  
A choking sob escaped her throat, and she fell to her knees by the sleeping Fat Lady, thin nightdress pooling around her. Crying brokenly, she buried her face in her shaking hands, rubbing her pounding temples. His voice went around and around in a cruel cycle of pain, filling her with dread and agony. Life wasn't worth living anymore if she wasn't herself! If the gods were merciful, they would kill her now and save the world from its misery.  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
The sleepy, croaking voice startled her. She looked up to see the Portrait Hole wide open, and a pajama-clad Harry Potter standing over her, worry and concern clear in his blurry gaze. Her heart dropped as she struggled to get to her feet, leaning against the wall in her weariness.  
  
Harry stepped towards her, rubbing his eyes roughly and holding back a yawn. "Why are you out here, Ginny? I heard a commotion a while ago, but Hermione said it was nothing." He stopped dead as he got a clear look at her tear-stained face, and his eyes widened with surprise. "What's wrong? Did something happen?" he asked quickly.  
  
Ginny looked up into his bleary gaze, heart pounding. The voices in her head were silenced, and all she felt was him near her, his breath on her salty skin. The realization hit her like a brick; he had no idea what had happened to her tonight.  
  
Her confused thoughts began to organize themselves, opportunities presented before her. What should she do?  
  
Suddenly his fingers were on her elbow, grasping gently. "You look absolutely knackered, Ginny; go to sleep," he said softly, pulling her towards the opening into the common room.  
  
Heart racing, she let herself go.  
  
Flying into his arms, she clung to him, dry sobs heaving from her throat. His muscles tensed under her at the sounds, but relaxed slightly as she tightened her grip on his shoulders. Arms were around her waist, grounding her, and she felt the light wisp of lips on her skin, kissing away the tears that had coursed down the curve of her neck. She let it all out, crying into his form as he kept his arms around her, pulling her into the common room and enveloping her in his warmth.  
  
~*~  
  
For days after her visit to Dumbledore's office, Ginny's roommates avoided her completely, throwing glances at her when they thought she didn't notice. It didn't matter to her; they had never been close friends, merely acquaintances. What irked Ginny was the way they had spread the story of that night of her nightmare like a wildfire throughout the school. Soon the more blatant and cruel of the students, many Slytherins, were mock-sobbing under their breath, screaming nonsense words in high-pitched voices that seemed to magically disappear the second a teacher walked near. These actions were egged on by a sneering Draco Malfoy, who seemed to be everywhere she was. He always had some slander to mutter under his breath as she passed him in the corridors, which wasn't much different than usual; except for the fact he knew what he was saying to her when he said Tom was going to visit her soon.  
  
Students weren't the only ones to keep a wary eye on her as days passed. Professor McGonagall averted her gaze whenever Ginny's class came in, seeming horrified at the thought of a Gryffindor at the mercy of a Slytherin, especially this Slytherin. Professor Lupin kept her behind more than once after the end of his class, asking after Harry in a falsely cheerful voice. She knew he was only trying to find out if she had done something to him under Voldemort's influence. Harry and Lupin now had weekly meetings in his office; there was no need to ask her anything.  
  
One professor whose eyes she could not meet was Snape. The memory of his seeing her right after the nightmare was one that haunted her the moment she set foot in the dungeons. He treated her with the same cool indifference he had given to her before, but there seemed something kinder in his air. Never looking up when he passed by the workstation she shared with Colin, she couldn't be sure of what he thought of her. Suddenly she began to see Snape as a man dealing with his own inner demons, not the vindictive Potions Master Harry seemed to see. She didn't understand Harry's exact reasons for hating the man; he had never shared them with. All she knew was that she felt an abrupt link with the ex-Death Eater, only because she had an idea of what darkness was like.  
  
Harry, who still didn't know what the disturbance was that woke him on the night he found her crying by the Fat Lady, had taken to walking her to her classes, along with Ron and Hermione. Hermione seemed particularly protective of her, sending scathing glares to anyone who dared mention a word about anything to either Ginny or Harry. Ginny hadn't told anyone what had happened to her; she wanted to feel as normal as possible before the predicted stroke on her will fell. Still, she and Harry didn't meet in the Room of Requirement as often as they had been. He thought it was because of O.W.L.S., which were coming in the next two months. She didn't disabuse him of the notion.  
  
News of Dumbledore's visit to the Wizengamot came quickly, publicized widely in The Daily Prophet, to which Harry had ordered a subscription a few weeks back. Fudge was quickly brought to face the same judges Harry had once faced. All but one found him incompetent to stay in office and deposed him and his staff. Dumbledore quickly placed Mad-Eye Moody in as acting Minister and returned to Hogwarts. Malfoy's cocky attitude staggered slightly, even with his father still at large.  
  
Ginny went to Dumbledore's office a few days after his return, and there they spent a good hour discussing all her possible options. Dumbledore was looking up a specific kind of Occlumancy, to see if it would be of any use to her. Although he kept a positive light on the meeting, she left his office feeling sickened with herself. It was time for her to decide what was best for Harry and the Order; she couldn't put it off any longer. Since Tom's reentry into her mind, she had been tricking her mind into shoving him off into a small corner where he could feel nothing, as she could tell by the frustration he tortured her with nightly. But it was only a temporary solution; she needed to leave Harry before something happened to him.  
  
Oh how she hurt when she finally accepted the truth! Harry was what she was living for, what she would die for. How could she just give him up when she loved him?  
  
Yes. She loved him.  
  
And that made her course all the harder.  
  
*  
  
She was bursting with the need to tell someone--anyone--of her plan in the time leading up to her birthday. With each passing day, she felt herself give in slightly to Tom, creeping closer into her conscious mind. Finally, after Professor Lupin had dismissed class the Friday before her birthday, she couldn't bear it any longer. Letting her classmates leave the room, she felt Lupin's eyes on her. She couldn't meet them, not even from a distance; she felt too guilty about her course of action.  
  
"I just wanted you to know that I'm going to break it off with Harry. He'll be safe from me," she said softly, looking down at her feet.  
  
Footsteps drew near her, and she felt a gentle hand on her elbow. "Ginny, are you sure you want to do this? Maybe there is another way-"  
  
She pulled away from him sharply, astounded at her own audacity towards a teacher. Her mother would be horrified if she knew. "I don't want to do this at all, sir, but I have to. I can't be the cause of Harry's defeat. I won't be the signature on his death warrant," she snapped, eyes locked defiantly to his shoulder.  
  
"I don't want him to be hurt, Ginny. You're going to hurt him."  
  
His voice chilled her, but within it she heard a desperate plea from a man who knew all too well what despair could do to a person. Heart clenching painfully, she braved a gaze at her professor. He looked haggard, painfully sad in the late-winter light streaming in from the classroom window. In his eyes was sadness beyond measure. It was a look she knew well; Harry carried it with him behind a mask of green eyes.  
  
Lupin looked at her for a silent moment, silently contemplating her. "You realize you're going to bring him pain, don't you?" he asked quietly.  
  
Trying to stop the tears from welling in her eyes, she nodded slowly. "I know better than anyone how much I'm going to hurt him," she whispered. "But at least he'll be alive."  
  
A low, ironic bark of a laugh escaped Lupin's lips. His mouth curled into a wry, angry smile. "What's the point of living if you don't have love?"  
  
Pain ripped from her as she winced at his words, feeling the full weight of her decision rest on her shoulders as she continued to look Lupin in the eye, mute for many a minute. How could she answer that when she agreed with him fully?  
  
"It came down to a simple choice, sir. I had to either save Harry or save myself. I chose to save Harry," she finally replied, pulling the strap of her bag over her shoulder and turning away.  
  
One foot was out the door when his voice stopped her. "And what's going to happen to you, Ginny?" he asked gently.  
  
She stopped in the doorway, keeping her back to her teacher. Something threatened to spill out of her soul as she contemplated his query, something dark and not her own.  
  
'You are mine now. Isn't that what you want to say, Virginia?'  
  
Shuddering slightly, she shoved his voice from her mind, and took a deep breath. "I need Harry to save myself. Since I can't have him, I suppose I'm lost," she said, voice edged with grief, and walked out the door.  
  
*  
  
The day of her birthday dawned cool and clear, spring already on its way. Ginny woke up with her hand clasped around the ring, which rested on its chain around her neck. Feeling groggier than usual, she sat up slowly, smiling slightly as she experienced sixteen for the first time. Her fifteenth birthday had been a depressing experience, as Michael hadn't gotten her anything and went around skulking and Ron had been too busy with O.W.L.S and Quidditch to remember. Of course, he remembered a month later, but that didn't help her any. Hopefully, this birthday would be a lot happier for her.  
  
Stretching her arms over her head, she thanked Merlin it was a Sunday and noticed that her roommates had already woken up and left the room. That wasn't strange anymore; they had taken to doing that ever since her nightmare two weeks ago. Shrugging, she hopped out of bed and headed for the loo, intent on making this the best birthday she had had in a long time.  
  
Hermione was waiting for her when she came down the stairs to the common room, sitting on a couch and reading. A tray of steaming food sat on the table in front of her, and Ginny's stomach rumbled hungrily. Smiling, Ginny went over to Hermione. "Morning, Hermione," she said cheerfully.  
  
Looking up with a start, Hermione grinned and waved Ginny over. "Happy birthday, Ginny! I brought your breakfast up to you. I hope you don't mind," she said as Ginny sat down next to her.  
  
"Oh, no. This is wonderful! Thank you," Ginny replied as she pulled the tray over and began to eat. Her mood was lifting already! This would be a good day, she could tell.  
  
"How did you sleep?" Hermione asked innocently, turning a page in her book.  
  
Ginny rolled her eyes. She wasn't fooled; Hermione had been keeping close tabs on her sleeping habits for the last few weeks. "Very well, thanks. Where are Ron and Harry?"  
  
Hermione gave a small shrug. "Heavens, off playing Qudditch, maybe. Ron's giving you the day off of practice. He thought that would be a nice gift," she said as Ginny swallowed a gulp of pumpkin juice.  
  
"Oh did he? What did you promise as a bribe, eh?" Ginny teased, nudging her friend slyly.  
  
Blushing lightly, Hermione shot Ginny a glance. "Don't you start; I'd love to know where you disappeared to last night," she shot back, a grin on her face.  
  
Ginny froze, toast halfway to her mouth. "What are you talking about, Hermione?" she asked after a moment, setting her toast down on the plate.  
  
Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Don't try to fool me. You and Harry seemed to disappear at the same time last night, but he came back first. I remember when Ron and I planned a stagger entrance; we always alternated who would leave first with who would come back first," she mused fondly, a light smile playing on her lips.  
  
Stomach knotting, Ginny racked her brain, shutting her eyes to aid her concentration. What did she do last night? She went to dinner, studied with Colin and Neville, played a game of chess against Ron, and then she and Harry met at the Room of Requirement for a few minutes. He had left her with a kiss, and then...  
  
Her blood iced in her veins and she gasped, hearing Hermione's exclamation of surprise beside her. Why was the rest of the night a blank? She didn't remember going back to the common room or going up to bed; how was this possible? It was almost like...  
  
'Dear Tom, I woke up with feathers in my hair and blood on my robes, and I can't remember what I did last night. It's a blank, and I don't understand. Why can't I remember?'  
  
A sob hitched in her throat; she felt Hermione's hands on her arms, shaking her and speaking frantically. Noticing nothing, Ginny shot up from the couch, plate falling to the floor with a clatter. Her eyes opened with a snap, and she looked around her frantically, afraid to see the blood on her hands.  
  
"Ginny, what's wrong with you? Talk to me!" Hermione exclaimed, looking on the verge of tears.  
  
Her feet flew past the shocked girl, out the common room, through the irate Fat Lady. She was a blur of red and black, unrecognizable to anyone. Past caring, she skidded down corridors, knocking past bewildered students and careening around corners. She had no idea where her feet were taking her until she raced through the doors in the Entrance Hall and found herself in the brisk early-spring air, sun shining mockingly down on her. Heart hammering at the speed of light, she went down the steps, trekking across the grounds with her arms wrapped around herself tightly.  
  
In the near distance she could see figures swooping through the air on their brooms, but she didn't go towards the pitch, knowing she would see Harry and Tom would make a frantic scramble for control over her. The wind whipped around her as she headed towards the lake, eyes unwillingly filled with tears. What had she done last night? Scrounging her memory, she came up with a blank. The last thing she remembered was Harry's goodnight kiss--- she tried not to linger on that thought before the urge to see him overwhelmed her---and then waking up this morning. There was nothing in- between.  
  
"Ginny!"  
  
Hermione's frantic cry shook her from her thoughts, and she started off across the grounds at a sprint, headed for the Forbidden Forest's edge. There, in the shadows of the trees, she could hide from her inquisitive friend.  
  
Would there ever come a time when she wouldn't have to hide?  
  
The ring around her neck seemed to burn into her skin, constantly reminding her of Harry as she watched Hermione fight the rising wind to go over to the pitch, waving her arms at the flyers. Ginny rested against a tree trunk, blood thudding in her veins as she saw two brooms zoom to the ground, jerk in shock, and zoom away from the pitch in opposite directions. Shivering, she hugged herself tighter. They wouldn't look for her here. She needed some time to think of what she would say to Harry. It was time.  
  
"Hiding, Weasley?"  
  
Stiffening at the sound of Malfoy's voice, she looked to her side and saw him standing near her, a thin smirk on his pasty face. She drew herself up, meeting his gaze defiantly. "Sod off."  
  
His smirk widened, and he stepped closer to her. "You always did have spirit. What happens when you run out of places to hide?"  
  
She shut her eyes, trying to block out his words. Tom hovered around her, brushing against the edges of her mind like a caress.  
  
"You can't hide from your own mind, Weasley."  
  
His breath was on her neck, but she was numb to his body heat. A hand rested on her elbow. Disgust filled her, but she paid it no mind, staying as inflexible as steel.  
  
"You haven't moved away from me; maybe Potter isn't enough for your needs, eh? Sluts are hungry bitches, or so I've heard," he said thoughtfully, moving his hand down to her hip.  
  
Everything in her was revolted at his actions, making her feel sick to her stomach. When she tried to pull away, his hands were pushing her back against the tree, rendering her immobile. Her eyes snapped open, meeting his cool grey gaze. "Let me go," she whispered, voice soft and deadly.  
  
Blonde hair fell into his eyes. "It would be the perfect revenge against your family; the only daughter taken by a Malfoy. And right under Potter's nose!" he crowed, laughing demonically.  
  
She shoved him away from her, causing him to fall to the dirt below. Sputtering angrily, he pulled himself up, brushing himself off with curses. And that's when she saw the black brand on his forearm. The skull she knew very well.  
  
Surprise jolted through her. "Get the hell away from me, Malfoy! I don't play with Death Eaters," she spat, backing away from him.  
  
Eyes widening in shock, he looked from her to his arm and back again. Anger flooded his face. "Well, you played with the strongest one of all, didn't you?" he roared. "Don't think he won't use you! What did you do last night, Weasley? Can't you remember?"  
  
"Sod off, Malfoy."  
  
Harry's voice came from a few feet away, and Ginny looked up at him quickly. He was sweaty and dirty from practice, anger radiating from every limb. In his left hand was his precious Firebolt; in his right was his wand.  
  
Malfoy sneered at Harry before turning on his heel and walking back towards the castle. Ginny relaxed with the relief of seeing his retreating back, feeling Harry take her elbow as he slipped his wand into his pocket. "What did he mean, Ginny?" he asked roughly.  
  
Taking a deep breath, she pulled away from him gently and met his fierce gaze. "He's a Death Eater," she said quietly.  
  
His gaze widened, and a sudden flood of realization flew across his face. She waited for him to reply, memorizing his features; she wouldn't have the chance to do this for a long time, if she was straight upon her course.  
  
Abruptly, he smiled down at her, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "I'll deal with him. Happy birthday, love. Hermione came out here going on about how you ran out on her or something. What's that about?" he asked.  
  
Shaking her head, she smiled thinly. "Nothing. Everything's fine, Harry."  
  
Studying her for a moment, he seemed to accept her answer. He glanced around quickly and leaned down to kiss her quickly. "Meet me outside the Portrait Hole at around eight, ok? I have to give you your present," he said with a mysterious smile as the calls of Ron and Hermione became clearer.  
  
She nodded, smiling weakly. He grinned widely and turned away from her, calling out to his two friends. The weight of the ring on her skin tripled.  
  
There was nowhere to hide.  
  
~*~  
  
The Marauders' Map was in his pocket; the Invisibility Cloak was in his schoolbag along with his wand. Harry was ready for Ginny as he paced the corridor leading up to the Fat Lady, who was watching him keenly. He didn't notice her glances as he waited for eight o'clock to come. Having never had a girlfriend to get a gift for, Harry had figured the perfect solution would be to take her to Hogsmeade, so she could pick her own gift. The secret Honeydukes passage was still open; all he had to do was get her back before curfew.  
  
Now that he thought about it, Ginny had been acting strangely for the last few weeks, ever since he had found her crying. She had been cutting their time together, pulling away from him. Her skin looked gaunt and pale, and the circles under her eyes grew darker with each passing night. And then the incident with Malfoy today; his words haunted Harry as he went through the day.  
  
'You played with the strongest one of all... Don't think he won't use you...'  
  
Apprehension for Ginny had been his constant companion, holding all other emotions in check. He didn't want to think of what Malfoy had meant by those words; Malfoy, the youngest Death Eater he had ever seen. He couldn't believe it had taken him this long to remember his vision from December. Voldemort was moving quickly to gather his forces. Harry had no idea what he was planning.  
  
"Hello, Harry."  
  
Ginny stood by the Portrait Hole, looking pale in the flickering torchlight. Her smile was weak, her face was wan. Harry pushed his suspicions out of his mind and walked over to her, smiling. "Evening, Ginny. Ready to go?" he asked, taking her hand and pulling her along the corridor.  
  
"I suppose so, but I need to talk to you, Harry," she said softly.  
  
Her mood was sullen, sorrowful; Harry didn't know how to react to her, so he just kept walking, always keeping an eye out for a professor or Filch. "We can talk later. I want to get your gift," he replied, pulling out the Mauraders' Map and looking at it.  
  
Walking in silence for a few minutes, Harry kept a grip on her limp hand. His heart was pounding painfully; what was wrong with her?  
  
Finally he came to a halt at the statue of the one-eyed witch and pulled out his wand. Ginny stood next to him, a small bit of curiosity darting across her face. "What is this?" she asked.  
  
He shot a grin at her. "A secret passage to Hogsmeade. Your brothers showed it to me." He tapped the statue. "Dissendium."  
  
The hump of the statue opened, and he faced her with a gentle smile. "I thought you might like a private trip to Hogsmeade."  
  
To his surprise, pain laced her gaze, and she turned away from him. "Harry, I need to talk to you now."  
  
Her voice was low, startling him. "All right," he said quietly, a suspicious sense of doom filling him.  
  
Licking her lips, she took a deep breath and met his gaze. There was no feeling in her eyes. "I can't do this anymore, Harry. I can't hide. I think we should take a break from each other, before someone gets hurt."  
  
Bowled over, shock filled him as her words sank in. "What?"  
  
Now she looked away, dark eyes bright with tears. "This was a dream, Harry. It's too hard to keep this from everyone, and... I can't love someone who doesn't love me back," she whispered.  
  
It was like someone had ripped his heart out and sliced it to shreds in front of him. Fumbling for words, he tried to take her hand. "Gin, don't do this. You don't---"  
  
She backed away from him a few steps, hugging herself as if she was in pain. "No, Harry. You don't love me. I know you don't. Can you say you love me? Can you?" she asked tearfully, voice rising.  
  
No. No, he couldn't. He didn't know what he felt. All he knew is that if he didn't have her, he wasn't going to survive any fight. If she wasn't supporting him, caring about him, he wouldn't defeat anything, much less a Dark Lord. There wasn't anything worth living for if he didn't have her. She had become that important to him in the past few months, and it scared him to the core.  
  
Something inside him was screaming at him to tell her that, but he couldn't find the words. Expressing grief was much easier than expressing need or care. What did he know about love anyway?  
  
"You can't tell me you love me. It's better this way for both of us. I'm... I'm a distraction anyway," she muttered, not meeting his eyes.  
  
Silently, he watched her, becoming detached from his self to avoid the pain and gaping hole she was causing within him. Ginny shook her head and pulled something from her neck, eyes on the floor. "I'm sorry, Harry. Goodbye," she whispered, dropping a chain by his feet and walking away from him.  
  
Reeling, he sat down on the cold stone floor, the one-eyed witch still open and waiting. He didn't bother to close it. All of him ached; he reached over and picked up the chain, seeing the ring dangle from the end. Shutting his eyes, he clenched his fist around it, struggling to block out the agony that threatened to overwhelm him.  
  
He had nowhere to turn.  
  
~*~  
  
'The wonder of hidden passages, Virginia. You shouldn't have let him show you it; now we know. His demise is imminent. You've fulfilled your purpose, Virginia. I am very proud.'  
  
She sobbed brokenly, numbness spreading through her body as his voice rang in her ears. Was she asleep? She didn't know the difference these days. Her torment during the day was to see Harry, the cold, impassive mask from the summer back in place. At night, she had Tom to torture her.  
  
'Do you want to know what you did that night? The night you can't remember?'  
  
She wanted desperately to remember, but she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of letting him know that. Besides, he would tell her anyway; he liked to see her cry for Harry.  
  
'You'll be pleased, I think. Harry will hate you even more for it.'  
  
Agony overwhelmed her. Gasping, she felt stabbing pains in her veins, wracking her head with throbbing ache. She felt like she was going to die.  
  
'You wrote down all the passwords to Gryffindor Tower and gave them to Draco Malfoy.'  
  
Merlin, make it stop. This was worse than dying. Strangely, even though she had never been the subject of it, she thought it felt like the Cruciatus Curse.  
  
'You're correct, Virginia. This is the Cruciatus Curse. But you're not the recipient of it.'  
  
Screams of terror pulled her from Tom's grasp, and she was awakened with her own cries of pain. Tumbling from her bed, she hit the floor with a rough thud. The tower was in uproar; she could hear Hermione sobbing from all the way in the common room. Fear seized her, and she struggled to calm herself. What was going on? Had something happened to Ron?  
  
'You wrote down all the passwords to Gryffindor Tower and gave them to Draco Malfoy.'  
  
"Ginny!"  
  
Ron's stricken voice pulled her from her stupor, and she looked up. He was standing in her doorway, still in his pajamas. Eyes bloodshot and face pale, he went over to her. As he reached down to help her to her feet, she felt him shaking like mad.  
  
She gripped his forearms. "What's happened, Ron?" she asked thinly.  
  
Ron shook his head, clenching his fists. "I don't know how they got in, but a couple of Death Eaters just tried to kidnap Harry in his bed," he replied hoarsely.  
  
Oh dear Merlin.  
  
Ginny began to shake uncontrollably, burying her face in her hands. Ron shifted in front of her, clearly distressed. "It would have worked if his scar hadn't woken him up before they cast the Silencing Charm. When he woke up, they began to torture him with the Cruciatus. That's when we all woke and jumped them. He's in the Hospital Wing now, and McGonagall wants everyone in the common room. She let me up here to get you," he explained quietly, voice stretched with stress.  
  
The aches in her body weren't subsiding; they were intensifying, causing her to want to pull her skin off with the pain. Finally she knew what the cause of her agony was: Harry's own torment.  
  
"Ginny, are you coming? Please stop crying; you aren't going to help Harry if your in a state like this," Rom pleaded.  
  
She raised her eyes to her wan brother, a sense of despair and numbness filling her. "I can't help him anyway."  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Hmmm. All thanks to Anne the Creator, also know as Anne the Beta.  
  
*waits for the flames* 


	10. Ten

Harry Potter was ready to die. He had been ready to die since the night of Cedric Diggory's death. The event of Sirius's death had only added to his resolve.  
  
Now, after being attacked in his own bed, having had Snape pour Nerve- Repair Potion down his throat and Ginny Weasley break up with him, he was near to begging Madam Pomfrey to just end his life. He didn't have a heart to stop anymore; Ginny had ripped that out. He was halfway there; all he needed was another push.  
  
It was near dawn in the Hospital Wing. Harry could see the pink tinges near the blue-black horizon from his bed. He hadn't slept a bit since being so rudely awakened by the Cruciatus Curse hours earlier. After Ron and Dean had dragged him to Madam Pomfrey, the matron had sent for a bleary-eyed Snape immediately, who had brought a vial of Nerve-Repair Potion and shoved it down his throat.  
  
Harry had just lain on the bed, letting them all have their way with him. In reality, Harry hadn't cared about being attacked. He had been numb to just about everything since Ginny's abrupt ending of their relationship a week ago.  
  
There was something wrong with how she had gone about breaking his heart, and he was keenly aware of it. From the looks he had garnered from Remus, he had the feeling he wasn't wrong. It was all too sudden, too painful; in all the time he had known Ginny, he hadn't thought her to be cruel.  
  
Not that he was going to find out. Ginny had made every effort to avoid him, and he had complied, making the days a sort of backward chase whenever they were in the same room or corridor. Everyone in Gryffindor seemed to notice the sudden change in the relationship between the two of them; Ron was almost frantic with the thought of dissension on the Qudditch team. Hermione had been shooting him looks for days, but he never told them about what had happened between him and Ginny. He suspected Hermione knew; after all, she was the cleverest girl in school. But there was no need to aggravate Ron with the knowledge that Harry had been with his sister once. It was over now. And unlike the time in autumn, Harry had a sinking feeling this was the end of all things.  
  
"Harry? Are you awake?"  
  
Remus stood in the doorway to the Hospital Wing, Face painfully lined and filled with worry. Harry straightened up, pasting on a slight smile for the man. No sense in bothering Remus with Ginny; there wasn't any reason to now. "Yes, I'm awake. What's going on? Have they found out how the Death Eaters got in?" he asked as Remus came closer, sitting at the chair at the side of the bed.  
  
The older man hesitated visibly, spiking Harry's curiosity. "Well, it seems that they had the passwords to Gryffindor Tower. The headmaster found a slip of paper with them in one of their pockets. Professor McGonagall is going insane, trying to find out who had leaked them," he said quietly, leaning over closer to Harry.  
  
If he had been inclined to feeling, shock would have been his main emotion. "You must be joking. That's what happened in my third year when Sirius tried to get to Wormtail," he said, a pang hitting him as he thought of his godfather. Sirius had always liked Ginny.  
  
A wry smile crossed Remus' face. "Well, I think we can be sure that Neville hasn't done it this time."  
  
"Then who did? I bet Malfoy got them," Harry muttered, fists clenching on his blankets.  
  
"And who in Gryffindor would give the passwords to Malfoy?" Remus asked, sighing heavily. "Harry, I think they might have used the Honeydukes passage to get in. That would explain why none of the wards went off. Did you tell anyone about it?"  
  
Harry shook his head. "No one except for Ron and Hermione. Of course Fred and George know, but that's it." A shot of pain traveled up his arm, and he winced slightly.  
  
Remus looked pale. "Are you hurting, Harry?" he asked.  
  
A short, bitter laugh left Harry's lips. "Not where you think I am," he said, gaze drifting back to the growing light outside his window. It was starting to become reddish, like the highlights in Ginny's hair. Promptly, he killed that thought. No more about Ginny, he told himself sternly.  
  
Remus wasn't smiling when he looked back at him. "Do you want to talk about Ginny?"  
  
Harry's eyes widened slightly. "How did you know? I didn't tell you, did I?"  
  
To Harry, Remus seemed to smack himself mentally before replying. "No, you didn't. She told me about a week ago. When did it happen?"  
  
Harry grimaced; the last thing he wanted to do was relive that night. "On her birthday. I was going to take her to Hogsmeade for a chance for her to pick out her gift, and she told me she didn't want to be with me because I didn't love her." He let out a low, sour laugh. "I spent about an hour sitting in front of that damned statue trying to figure out what I had done wrong," he said bitterly.  
  
Jaw slack, Remus stared at Harry. "She knew about the passage?" he asked, apprehension edging his tone.  
  
Nodding, Harry shrugged. "Yes. I had to show her it to actually travel it, you know. And why was she telling you about her plans to ruin my life anyway?" he asked abruptly, indignation rising within him.  
  
Remus stood from his chair and began to pace. "And she knew the passwords..." He trailed off, shock and horror filling his eyes.  
  
Harry frowned, not enjoying the way Remus was talking. "What the hell are you talking about?" he said angrily.  
  
"You don't understand, Harry," Remus replied distractedly.  
  
"Then why don't you inform me?" Harry shot back testily, his temper getting the better of him. "I'm the one who was attacked by bloody Death Eaters, and you're here raving about my ex-girlfriend!"  
  
Remus stared at Harry for a silent moment before sitting back down. "You want to be informed, do you? Well, you aren't going to enjoy this," he warned.  
  
"I don't enjoy anything in my life; why should this be any different?" Harry replied tersely.  
  
"Because you might want to kill someone when I'm done," Remus said wearily. "Sit back and listen, and don't try to kill me until I'm done speaking, all right?"  
  
Feeling mutinous, Harry nodded curtly. Remus took a deep breath and shut his eyes. "Voldemort has the ability to enter Ginny's mind. She told me, the headmaster, and Minerva this about three weeks ago. Because of this, it is highly possible he would be able to obtain any information she knew of the Order, its plans, and you," he said slowly, looking right into Harry's face.  
  
The numbness melted away as complete shock knocked Harry over. He stared mutely at Remus, mind not able to wrap itself around his words. "What?"  
  
"Tom Riddle is still inside Ginny's soul, Harry. He could completely possess her at any time, or so Dumbledore supposes, Remus said softly, the exasperation at the young man next to him falling away to reveal exhaustion and pity.  
  
Harry scrambled for words, pieces starting to click inside his mind as he processed Remus' words. "But, I destroyed the diary! I thought he was gone from her, even if she still had nightmares!" he exclaimed, fear for Ginny overwhelming him. Bloody hell, what was Voldemort doing to her?  
  
Remus sighed. "So we all thought. Obviously he had a much stronger grasp on her than we assumed. So, since she knew of the passage," he added as Harry sat in mute shock, "and she knew the passwords, it is highly possible Voldemort might have used her to get his Death Eaters to you."  
  
"No wonder she's looked so tired," Harry muttered, rubbing his scar with a hand. "Is that why she broke up with me? That's absurd! I am as much a danger to her as she could be to me!"  
  
"It's not just you, Harry. The whole Order could be threatened by Ginny's involvement," Remus said cautiously.  
  
Harry opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again. "Well, why can't she start Occlumancy lessons with Dumbledore? Then she'd be all right, wouldn't she?" he asked desperately, a sinking feeling of doubt filling him as he saw Remus slowly shake his head.  
  
"Occlumancy deals with a foreign force in the mind. It can't help with the soul. The soul is intangible, Harry; there's no way to go into it, sieve out the foreignness and come out with perfection," Remus said quietly. "We already thought about it."  
  
"Then what can we do for her? You can't just let Voldemort take over and destroy her!" Harry exclaimed fiercely, anger and hate fighting for first place inside him.  
  
Remus looked at him, and suddenly Harry saw the hopelessness within his friend's eyes, threatening to take him over. "I don't know Harry. This may be a fight Ginny will have to win on her own."  
  
Harry clenched his fists until his knuckles were as white as the sheets. He'd be damned if Ginny would have to fight Voldemort on her own. Even if she denied him over and over, he would not leave her to the mercy of Voldemort. He didn't abandon the people he cared for, no matter what the cost to himself.  
  
~*~  
  
Madam Pomfrey discharged Harry two days after his attack, sending him back into a myriad of curious and worried students. All but ignoring the sympathy coming from his fellow students, he went full-throttle into trying to get Ginny to talk to him again, much to the surprise of Ron and Hermione. His two friends kept asking why Ginny was now so important, but he kept his knowledge to himself.  
  
Ginny avoided him just as before, struggling with the idea of going to Dumbledore with her guilty conscience. She knew it was her fault; everything told her so, from the way Tom taunted her to the way Draco Malfoy leered at her in the corridors. But how could she tell that to Dumbledore, who had trusted her? And what would happen to her after he knew? Would she be sent into seclusion or isolation, sentenced to insanity while Voldemort tortured her night after night?  
  
Slowly, she began to pull away from the rest of her classmates, especially Colin, Neville, and Luna, who were her few true friends. It pained her every time she walked away from them in the corridors, but she knew what she had to do. She also enforced her plans upon Ron and Hermione, skipping meals to hide in the library and wait to eat practically alone. Never staying to speak to Professor Lupin anymore, she raced from class to class, concentrating solely on her studies and blocking everything else from her mind.  
  
It seemed that her tactics were working to an extent; in her dreams, Tom was furious with her, always trying to grab any information from her.  
  
'They can't have just put you in isolation, Virginia. Dumbledore would never do that to a student. What is going on? I know you want to tell me, your oldest friend...'  
  
Sometimes, she would wake up with triumph flooding in her veins. 'You didn't count on my willingness to sacrifice myself, did you Tom?' she would think.  
  
But the solitude was wearing on her, a girl who had always been surrounded by family. She had no one to speak to, no one to share with. The ache for Harry grew daily, poignant enough to actually drive her to spy on him while he was studying in the library on some days. She had always adored watching him read; the ways his eyes narrowed when he read a difficult passage and his hair fell into his gaze were things she had memorized long ago, even when she was going out with Michael. After all, there was a difference between giving up someone and getting over them.  
  
Having no idea what he was researching, she was astonished when she saw the title of one of his books he had left on the table: Secrets of the Soul.  
  
Did he know about her?  
  
Ridiculous. He couldn't. Dumbledore wouldn't break her trust like that. It must be a project for Divination.  
  
That thought steadied her until she remembered he and Ron had dropped Divination after O.W.L.S.  
  
Oh Merlin, she was foiled. No wonder he had been trying in vain to talk to her for weeks.  
  
After that day, she stopped watching him in the library and struggled with her loneliness on her own. From what she could tell, Ron was becoming frantic with worry for her, joining Hermione in writing a letter to Mrs. Weasley. A pleasant letter from her mother came soon after the middle of April with all sorts of information about the family, causing Ginny to burn it before she had finished the first paragraph. She couldn't risk anything anymore.  
  
It was the Wednesday before Easter when Ginny came out of her Potions class to see Harry waiting for her, a cool expression on his face. Apprehension rose within her; she had been waiting for this.  
  
"I need to talk to you," he said bluntly, the first time she had heard his voice clearly in almost three weeks.  
  
Reveling in it in a secret part of herself, she schooled her features to indifference. "Sorry, I can't."  
  
She tried to get past him, but he caught her arm with a strong grip, rendering her immobile. "You're going to. We need to talk."  
  
He pulled her down to a shadowed part of the corridor, keeping a firm hold on her. His touch on her burned, even through her robes, and she had to push down her desire to pin him against the wall and kiss the breath from him; it was a shock to feel something like that for the first time in a very long time. She had become more unfeeling than she had thought.  
  
"So," he began as he looked down on her. "Would you like to tell me exactly why you broke up with me?"  
  
Not meeting his gaze, she bit her lip hard. "This is ridiculous, Harry. You're only making this more difficult on yourself," she said, heart pounding erratically. She hadn't been this close to him in ages, or so it seemed.  
  
His grip tightened, fingers sinking into her skin. "That's bollocks, Ginny. Tell me the truth. I want to here it from you," he muttered darkly.  
  
Breathing shallowly, she shook her head. "I told you why; if you can't remember, maybe you need a Pensive."  
  
His other hand reached up and took her chin in its grasp, jerking her eyes to his abruptly. As she scanned his gaze, her blood froze. The pain and suffering she had inflicted upon him shone clearly in their green depths, clenching her heart with guilt. What had she done to him?  
  
"I know your secret, Ginny. Why the hell didn't you just tell me Tom was still inside you?" he asked harshly, a note of pleading behind his tone.  
  
Stomach knotting, she could only gape at him for a moment. "What?" she said faintly.  
  
"I know he can see into your mind. I know he's still in your soul. Remus told me. Why didn't you tell me?" he said, relaxing his hold on her chin. His fingers still lingered on her skin, caressing gently.  
  
After the shock of his queries faded, anger swelled up inside her. "What? Remus told you!" she exclaimed. How dare he? Who was he to control her life?  
  
Harry's eyes narrowed. "Don't go off blaming him; I pressed him for it. But you should have been the one to tell me! I can help you, Ginny. I've been looking for ways-"  
  
"Harry, don't be absurd. You can't do anything for an intrusion into the soul; don't you think I've checked? Dumbledore told me there was practically nothing to do for me. You have to let me go," she cut in, trying to pull away from him.  
  
The hand on her chin moved to her other arm, pinning her in place. "I'm not going to let him destroy you, Ginny. I almost had to see that once in my life, and I won't see it again. Let me stay with you," he said, voice strong with resolution.  
  
She shook her head, avoiding his eyes again. "You don't understand, Harry. I'm trying to save you and everyone else. It's better this way, don't you understand?" she asked, desperation entering her words. Why wouldn't he let her go?  
  
Harry let out a low, ironic laugh. "You're a hypocrite. How can you say that to me? Not two months ago, you were lying in the Hospital Wing because of me, and when I tried to break this off you almost throttled me."  
  
His words caught her off-guard. She had completely forgotten about their conversation the night after Pettigrew's attack.  
  
"How can you ask me to just let you go? If our places were switched, you wouldn't dream of letting me go. Ginny," he said, cupping her cheek in one hand and bringing her eyes back to his. "I'm not letting go of you, no matter what you say. I'm going to help you," he finished fervently, eyes boring into her, challenging the demon in her soul.  
  
Aching for his mouth on her skin, she almost began to cry. The need for him was so great, it almost overpowered every rational thought in her body. She leaned towards him slowly.  
  
'So the boy is in love with you. That's interesting.'  
  
Tom's interjection into her mind brought her back into the real world, where she was a weapon against Harry and there was no such thing as love. Pulling away, she escaped his grasp easily with his shock in place. "You can't help me, Harry. No one can," she said softly, tears thickening her voice.  
  
Eyes wide, Harry reached for her. "Ginny, I won't let-"  
  
"You don't have a choice, Harry. None of us do," she interrupted, blinking back the tears threatening to escape. With a sad, weak smile, she turned away and walked down the corridor.  
  
He called after her, his stubbornness surprising her. "You do have a choice, Ginny! And you're letting him win!"  
  
She didn't turn back.  
  
*  
  
On Easter morning, she woke up to find a chocolate egg decorated with stars and Quaffles on her pillow. Smiling, she sat up and reached over to open it, looking forward to see what candy filled the hollow space.  
  
Inside was the wedding ring of Lily Potter, pillowed on Bernie Botts' Every- Flavor Beans, along with a note.  
  
'I'm not letting go.'  
  
With a choking breath, Ginny slipped the ring onto her finger, buried her face in her hands, and wept.  
  
~*~  
  
The Monday after Easter, Harry collapsed into a chair by Remus' desk, wiping beads of sweat from his brow. The slight pain he felt during his fighting lessons with Remus was nothing compared to the pain he had been experiencing for the last month. Still, Remus had a killer Stunning Spell.  
  
"Ginny came to see me today after her class. She was furious with me. Did you tell her I told you about her?" Remus asked as he sat down next to Harry, Summoning two bottles of Butterbeer and a couple glasses of water from the other side of his office.  
  
Harry nodded. "Yes. I tried to talk to her last week, but it didn't go too well. She's quite stubborn."  
  
Remus smiled weakly. "I think she has a right to be stubborn, Harry. The most evil wizard in a very long time, your archenemy, is residing in a part of her soul."  
  
"I'm not going to just watch as she's dragged down into hell, Remus. I couldn't do that," Harry replied as he gulped down his water. "Besides, what did you think I was going to do? Brood and sulk over why she broke up with me?"  
  
Remus watched Harry for a moment, reverie in his eyes. "Sirius was right," he finally murmured. "You're less like your father than we thought."  
  
Giving Remus a crooked grin, Harry ran a hand through his hair. "I don't think that's such a bad thing anymore."  
  
"It's not. I can see much of Lily in you, Harry. You should be glad to be your own person," Remus said, taking a swallow of his Butterbeer.  
  
Harry sighed heavily. "Did Ginny really come in here and yell at you today?" he asked.  
  
With a wry smile, Remus nodded. "It was like seeing an angry Lily. I had to do a double take." He paused, smiled fading. "But she was wearing the ring on her finger, Harry."  
  
Taking a breath, Harry grinned slightly. "Good."  
  
She had put him through so much pain and anger for days, and yet as long as she was wearing his ring, he could forgive her. It meant she still cared for him, still wanted to care for him. He didn't feel so lost now; he didn't doubt what he needed to do.  
  
He took a drink of his bottle to fortify himself. "I think I found a way to help her," he said slowly, causing Remus to straighten in his chair.  
  
"Oh really? Please share," Remus said.  
  
"I have to kill Voldemort."  
  
Eyebrows shooting up into his hairline, Remus coughed. "Excuse me?"  
  
"I have to kill Voldemort to end the power he has over Ginny," Harry repeated, the prophecy ringing in his head.  
  
Neither shall live while the other survives...  
  
Remus stared at Harry. "Is that the only option you found?"  
  
Harry grimaced. "Well, I've got to become his murderer anyway! Why not have a personal purpose for it?" he said testily.  
  
The older man's jaw went slack. Harry winced; Remus didn't know about the prophecy. "Trelawney made a prophecy right before I was born basically saying that whoever the Dark Lord marked as his equal was going to have to kill or be killed. Dumbledore told me," he explained. "You can ask him to hear the whole bit."  
  
"Marked as an equal..." Remus trailed off, looking especially pale.  
  
Harry pointed at his scar. "That's why I can speak Parseltounge, among other things. It was a transfer of power. So, I have to kill him or be killed. And I'd rather kill him."  
  
Remus gaped at Harry. "How long have you known this?" he asked in bewilderment.  
  
"Since June. Dumbledore told me after I came back from the Department of Mysteries," Harry said tiredly.  
  
"Although I'm sure I should have told you earlier," came a voice from the doorway.  
  
Harry and Remus looked to see the headmaster standing in the doorway, a small smile on his face. "May I join you, Remus? I do so have an affinity for Butterbeer," he said.  
  
Remus nodded mutely. With a quick wave of his hand, Dumbledore closed the door and came to the desk, Summoning a chair and a Butterbeer from the other side of the room. "How is the training going? I'm sure Harry is catching on quickly," he added before taking the first sip from his bottle.  
  
"He is, Albus. He's quite adept at dueling and swordplay," Remus replied.  
  
Dumbledore sighed. "Good. Now, could one of you please inform me of Miss Weasley's situation? She has not been to see me in almost a month, and I am quite concerned."  
  
"She's not speaking to anyone, Headmaster. I think she's trying to isolate herself because of... Well, you know," Harry stumbled over his words. What could he say to describe this? "I tried to talk to her, but she wouldn't listen to me."  
  
"She is dealing with this in the way she thinks best, Harry. This must be very difficult for her, especially since there seems to be no way to help her," Dumbledore said gently.  
  
Harry met the headmaster's gaze squarely. "If Voldemort was killed, she would be ok. I read it in books about this sort of thing," he said steadily.  
  
"Harry, that's slightly extreme for right now, don't you think?" Remus said, a note of desperation in his voice.  
  
Dumbledore looked at Harry gravely. "You don't know how to kill him yet."  
  
With the same seriousness, Harry looked back at the dimmed blue eyes. There was no way he would let Voldemort have Ginny, even if he died in the effort. Because, as he had realized over the last few weeks, that's what it meant to love someone.  
  
It meant being able to die for them.  
  
"Then teach me."  
  
~*~  
  
"Draco, the Weasley girl has given me nothing. What is going on?"  
  
"My lord, she has put herself in isolation. I do not know whether it was voluntary or not."  
  
A pause, then a frustrated sigh. "Then she must be brought to me, face to face, so I can put her back to rights. She was most useful to me."  
  
"The final Qudditch match is Gryffindor v. Hufflepuff, my lord. May I suggest an attack? She will be easy to get in the air."  
  
"Get to the arrangements, Draco. Don't fail me. That Weasley girl will be your prize if you succeed."  
  
"Consider it done, my lord."  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: Hmmm. Many thanks to Anne. Please read and review. 


	11. Eleven

With three days until the Quidditch Final against Hufflepuff, Harry noticed Ron's agitation at his sister grow triple-fold as she continued to ignore everyone who came into her presence, including her fellow teammates. The youngest Weasley boy tried multiple times to corner her as she left the pitch after practices, but she always slipped past him. Going mad with the situation, he took out his frustrations on the pitch, flying like a madman. Hermione, who was also having no success with the girl, was just as irritated and perplexed as her boyfriend. She spent much of her free time in the library, looking up spells to block dreams for Ginny, thinking that was the cause of her sudden isolation. Neither she nor Ron had any idea of what was really going on. 

Harry also tried to talk to her, but what could he say? _Well, Ginny, I've decided I'm going to kill Tom to save you. Are you going to talk to me now?_

He didn't have to ask to know her answer. It would always be no. 

Seeing his friends in such frustration because of their lack of knowledge sent him into a phase of relentless guilt. He knew all of these things, and yet he didn't tell them. Ron and Hermione were above all the two people who deserved to know everything, including the prophecy. So, after a taut and edgy Quidditch practice, Harry pulled Ron aside as they headed for the castle for curfew. 

"Don't disappear with Hermione tonight, all right? I need to talk to you both," he said quietly, watching Ginny stride past out of the corner of his eye. The ring flashed on her finger, catching the last light of the day as the sun sank towards the horizon, red and gold streaking the sky. 

Ron reddened slightly, but nodded. "All right, mate. We'll be in the common room. Say," he added as they walked to the castle side by side, "Has Ginny said anything to you lately?" 

Harry shook his head, trying to control the sinking feeling in his stomach. "No, she hasn't. Why?" 

"I'm getting worried. From what Colin Creevey and Neville have told me, she hasn't talked to them either. I can't understand what's going on," Ron commented darkly, running a hand through his hair. 

Harry shrugged and said no more, letting them walk up to the common room in silence. _You will understand, Ron. You won't want to in the end, but you will. _

Later that night, Harry and Ron dragged Hermione from her books, and went down to the Room of Requirement. Hermione, who was extremely displeased to have been taken from her research, gave Harry an earful as they walked the corridors. 

"Nice to see you taking an interest in Ron and me, Harry! Why the sudden need to talk to us? You were doing just fine with the common courtesies," she snapped as they entered the Room of Requirement. 

Rolling his eyes, Ron led her to the sofa as Harry cast a quick Silencing Charm over the room and turned back to them. "I'm sorry for being a bit of a prat, but I had good reason," he said, sitting across from his friends and running a hand through his hair. 

Hermione pursed her lips. "You always have a good reason, don't you?" 

"Hermione, this is important," Ron interjected before she could say another word. "Let Harry talk." 

Harry shot his friend a small grin before becoming completely serious. Nerves thrumming, he took a deep breath, praying his friends would take his news calmly. "You want to know why Ginny's been ignoring everyone, especially us?" 

Both nodded, going pale as he mentioned Ginny's name. Harry sighed. "She's still under the influence of Voldemort," he said softly, apprehension filling him as Ron's jaw dropped, freckles bright against his pale skin. 

Hermione gasped. "What?" 

"A part of Tom Riddle is still inside her soul, and Voldemort is trying to use her to gain an advantage over the Order and me. He can feel what she feels, see what he sees, know what she knows," Harry continued, hate building up in his veins. 

Ron was completely silent as Hermione opened and closed her mouth several times. "How do you know this?" she asked faintly. 

Hesitating, Harry looked at Ron. "Because she and I were together. I mean, _together_," he said, watching Ron's mouth drop open in complete shock. 

"She was your girlfriend?" Ron sputtered, earning a glare from Hermione. 

"That's hardly important right now, Ron," she hissed before turning back to Harry. "Isn't there anything Dumbledore can do? Would Occlumency work for her?" she asked, panic starting to creep into her voice. 

Shaking his head, Harry tried not to feel nervous at the look Ron was giving him. "Occlumency only works for an intrusion into the mind. It can't help with an intrusion into the soul," he said morosely. 

Finally, Ron spoke. "How long were you and Ginny dating?" 

"Since August," Harry replied promptly. _Not like I'm counting or anything._

Looking flustered, Ron gaped for a moment. "Why didn't you tell us?" 

"I thought I was protecting her by keeping it a secret, or else I would have told you, really. But it doesn't matter now; she broke up with me," Harry said, a note of bitterness in his tone. 

"What?" Hermione shrieked, causing both boys to wince. "_She_ broke up with _you_?" 

"It happens, Hermione," Harry said coolly as Ron's jaw seemed to become permanently stuck to the floor. 

Hermione bristled visibly. "I know that. It just didn't seem sensible, that's all. Ginny loves you; why would she hurt you?" she asked simply. 

At this, both Harry and Ron turned shocked gazes to her. 

"She loves _me_?" Harry said, bewildered. 

"She _loves_ him?" Ron exclaimed. 

Rolling her eyes, Hermione nodded exasperatedly. "Of course she does! Didn't she ever tell you? And why do you care?" she asked Ron abruptly, facing him completely. 

Harry didn't hear Ron's flabbergasted reply; his own turbulent thoughts drowned everything else out. She _loved_ him? Was that possible? 

Why? 

Why would anyone love him like that? 

The idea of love was still fairly new to him; he himself was still grappling with the idea that he was in love with her. But he couldn't understand why someone would want to love him. What had he done to deserve anyone's love?

"And anyway, Ron, the state of Harry and Ginny's relationship isn't quite as important as the fact that she still had Voldemort inside her!" he heard Hermione say hotly when he came back into the conversation. Ron flinched again at the sound of the Dark Lord's name. 

Silently, Harry watched as Hermione looked at him carefully. "What can help her if Occlumency won't?"

Now was the time to tell them. They had to know sooner or later, and it should be sooner. Harry took a deep breath. "He has to be killed. And I have to kill him," he said as he exhaled slowly. 

His friends looked at him as if he was insane, confusion flooding their features. He sighed. "At the Department of Mysteries, Neville broke the prophecy without anyone reading it. But that was only a record of the words. Someone said it, and someone else had to hear it," he said. 

Hermione shook her head. "I don't recall any True Seers coming forth, Harry. What are you talking about?" 

"Trelawney," Ron said quietly, looking at Harry with surprising calmness.

Harry stared at Ron. "You remember?"

Starting to look irritated, Hermione pursed her lips. "Remember what?" she asked sharply. 

Ron ignored her, nodding at Harry. "Of course. You told me about it the night after you and Hermione saved Sirius from the Dementors," he replied. 

"Would one of you blockheads please tell me what you are bloody talking about?" Hermione yelled before Harry could reply, red in the face with frustration. 

Harry and Ron shared a tiny grin before turning back to the girl. "Trelawney made a prediction during my third-year exam about how Voldemort's servant would return. Well, I think we all remember the Shrieking Shack," Harry said wryly. 

Hermione's eyes bugged out of their sockets. "She made a correct prediction?"

Harry smiled slightly at Hermione's shock. "Two."

"So Dumbledore must be the one who heard it," Ron added. 

Sitting back against the sofa, Hermione waved at Harry. "Go on, then. Tell us what the prophecy said," she said faintly, looking a bit shell-shocked. 

Gulping, Harry mustered up his courage. This was going to be the hard part. "Well, it said that someone who was born at the end of July was going to have the power to defeat Voldemort, and would be marked as his equal."

"Your scar," Hermione breathed, eyes going to Harry's forehead. 

Ron glanced from Harry's eyes to his scar and back. "So that's why you can speak Parseltongue."  

Nodding, Harry continued. "It also said the child would be born to those who had defied Voldemort three times before. And," he hesitated. "And, the child would either have to kill Voldemort, or be killed," he added quietly, watching as Hermione's face went pale.

_Neither can live while the other survives._

"Merlin, Harry. You have to kill him?" Ron asked thinly. 

Hermione sniffed; her eyes looked suspiciously bright. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Harry had to look away from the stricken eyes of his friends. "I suppose I didn't want to burden you," he muttered, feeling ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry for it. I knew you'd want to know."

The three friends were silent as the words hung in the air. 

_Neither can live while the other survives. _

Harry, who was staring determinedly at his feet, felt a small hand rest on his arm after a time. 

"Whatever happens, Harry, we'll be with you. As long as you let us, we'll help you," Hermione said softly. 

"You know it, mate," Ron added. 

Harry looked up and saw them both smiling in reassurance at him, even though their faces were whiter than sheets. Courage soaring, he returned their smiles slightly. "Thanks. I appreciate it," he said quietly. They were true friends, true family to him; he wouldn't take them for granted any longer. 

A thought occurred to him, and he let out a chuckle, startling his friends. "I was just thinking," he began, "about who else could have been the one the prophecy meant." 

Hermione looked at him quizzically. "Who?"

"Neville."

Ron let out a high-pitched noise that sounded oddly like a laugh and Hermione's jaw dropped. "You're joking!" she exclaimed. 

Shaking his head, Harry shrugged. "No, I'm not. He was born at the same time, his parents were like mine. But Voldemort picked the half-blooded child, the one like himself," he replied. 

"That's interesting," Hermione said thoughtfully, a pensive look coming into her eyes. 

Ron shook his head disbelievingly. "That's weird, mate. So, how are you planning on killing You-Know-Who?" 

Hermione rolled her eyes and smacked Ron lightly. "Say his name, Ron. It's about time."

Harry sighed. "Dumbledore and I are searching for spells, and I'm learning wandless magic, since my wand and Voldemort's are brothers. It's coming along slowly," he said, standing. 

Getting up with him, Ron and Hermione followed him to the door. "But what about Ginny?" Ron asked as they left the Room of Requirement. "There must be something she can do until you kill him."

"I've been looking. Leave it to me; I'll talk to her," Harry said as they walked down the corridor. 

Hermione snorted as they turned a corner. "Talk? Is that what they call it these days?" she said with a suggestive eyebrow raise.

Ron let out a strangled laugh as Harry turned scandalized eyes onto Hermione. "Oh, and I'm sure you and Ron study all the time, right?" 

"Leave me out of this, mate!" Ron exclaimed. 

Hermione just smiled, put her arm through Harry's and slipped her hand into Ron's. The trio walked down the hall together, Harry and Ron baiting each other the whole way back to the common room. 

~*~

As she slipped on her Quidditch robes before the game on Saturday, Ginny decided that she was sick as hell of being noble. 

Alone in the changing room, she assumed the rest of the team was still eating breakfast in the Great Hall surrounded by their supporters. Because of her self-imposed isolation, she had swallowed her toast quickly and escaped to the pitch, intent on being prepared before anyone else. Being in the changing room alone reminded her of the incident with Harry in September, which reminded her of his fevered kiss, which made her want to curse and kill herself to stop her near-constant thoughts of him. 

It was then she decided that nobility was completely overrated and only caused problems. If anyone else could hear her thoughts, they'd say she wasn't a true Gryffindor. Well, they could attempt to isolate themselves from the world they knew because of an infestation of their soul, and then they could tell her that nobility was a beautiful trait! 

Sighing, Ginny sat down on a bench and began to re-do her ponytail. Somehow she knew that if it was any other time in her life, she wouldn't think nobility was such a bad thing. But right now, she only wanted to throw caution to the wind, find Harry, and kiss him senseless. Ever since their last confrontation almost two weeks ago, she had been struggling to keep her desire under control, much to the amusement of Tom, whenever he was around. Coupled with the constant torture he was giving her because of her isolation, her days and nights were spent in a state of turmoil. 

She knew it would take all of her self control not to tackle Harry in mid-air today during the game, and it would be hard to control her urge to hug him if they won the Cup. In fact, she actually wondered how she would pull it off; all the pent-up desire and need was making her one frustrated girl. A girl could only control herself for so long. How was she supposed to refuse the one she loved?    

The only joy she was deriving from her life was the fact that Tom wasn't getting any information from her anymore. She had been going through the last month in a complete daze, not reading any letters from her mother, reading any paper or magazine, or talking to any teachers, especially Lupin and Dumbledore. But it was an empty victory; in her heart she knew she would rather be with Harry. 

Merlin, she had never wanted someone more. Where was her happy ending? Did she have one? 

"You're wearing the ring."

Oh bloody hell. 

She didn't look up. "I didn't hear anyone come in," she said stoically, trying to keep her blood pressure from rising. 

"I can be very quiet when I need to be," came Harry's throaty reply as his steps came closer to her sitting form. 

Breathing speeding up, Ginny scooted away from him, shoving an eager Tom from the front of her mind. "Please leave, Harry. I've made my choice."

He sat next to her. "What if it wasn't the right one?" he asked quietly. 

She still didn't look at him; she had no idea how she would control herself if she did. "Does it matter? I made it; there's no going back," she said with a slight edge of bitterness. Strangely, Tom was nowhere to be found. She wondered what was going on inside her mind. 

Harry cleared his throat. "Why are you wearing the ring if you've made your choice?"

The words left her mouth before she could think about it. "Because I have hope." 

His hand reached over to cup her cheek, bringing her gaze to his. His eyes burned into hers, making her insides melt. "You are my hope, Ginny. If I can't have you, I can't have hope," he whispered. 

Her heart sped up, the blood boiling in her veins. What girl didn't want to hear someone say those words to her? And it was Harry, wonderful brave Harry who didn't care that she was a danger to him, didn't care that she wasn't beautiful like Cho Chang or Parvati Patil, and didn't care about the voices inside her head. All he cared about was her soul, her own self. She wanted to give in to her heart, wanted to feel his mouth on hers once more. Even if it was for the last time. 

"I know what love means, Ginny."

His words took her by surprise. He smiled at the shock in her eyes and continued. "Love means you're willing to die for someone. Well, I think I love you, Ginny."

The floor seemed to drop from below her feet, and she almost fainted in his arms. The world was ending around her; he loved her. Merlin, he _loved_ her! 

And she couldn't do a thing about it. 

Despair of the worst kind overwhelmed her, and she pulled away from his grasp, turning her back to his face. Looking at him was becoming unbearable. 

"Let it go, Ginny. I don't care who you have in your head, I just want you."

If there was a god, it was most definitely a man. A woman would never let a fellow female be tortured in this wretched way. She was tearing, splitting apart at the seams. Her need for him was beginning to overwhelm everything else she knew or felt. 

Dimly, she heard him stand and come around to the side her face was pointed, sitting down once more and keeping her gaze. In his vibrant eyes, in the green she loved so much, was dark want and simmering love, echoed in every pore of his skin, every movement of his limbs. "Why are you letting him win, Ginny? He'll triumph over your will like he did in your first year; do you want him to?" he asked softly, taking one of her hands between his. 

Her resistance was crumbling, and she didn't care. It was always the same; she could never resist him, no matter how long she held out or how hard she tried. In one quick action, she flung her arms around his neck and crushed her mouth against his, knocking him onto his back with the abruptness of the motion. He opened up to her immediately, and it was like a long-missing piece of her soul had come back into place. 

It was a sweet surrender of her mind, leaving everything else behind to immerse herself fully in him. His mouth was hot on hers, moving with her in the most blissfully familiar way and causing her to moan softly in the back of her throat. Hands clutching at the nape of his neck, the need for air left her completely as she felt his fingers slip beneath her robes and clothes to skin, sinking into her flesh, marking her as his. She didn't care about anything but him and the way he made her feel. 

In the wake of this, as his mouth left hers to make a trail down her neck, her mind was silent, making her wonder. Why wasn't Tom taunting her, gloating over her? It was almost like Harry's presence inside her was overwhelming him, making him lose his grasp upon her. She knew he was still there, but having Harry merge with her and become a part of her seemed to neutralize him. 

Then his lips left her skin completely, and she was sprawled across his form, meeting his glazed eyes. Her heart beat wonderfully against her ribs at the sight of his mussed hair and askew glasses, bringing her pleasure to see it once more. It had been too long to go without him. 

He gave her a crooked smile. "Are you all right?" he asked, voice dark and husky.

_How infuriatingly sweet. Potter can block me when you're together. I shall have to take care of that._

Creating a torrent of pain in her head, Tom smashed back into her mind with those fearsome words. Ginny moaned, sliding off Harry to the floor and holding her head in her hands. She was doomed, and Harry was too. Soon Harry's hands were on her shoulders, rubbing gently. "Is he still there?" he asked. 

She nodded, not meeting his eyes. "You should go, Harry. This isn't right," she whispered, skin calling out for his touch against her will. Tom gloated. 

_He is your weakness, and you are his. I shall keep that in mind for today..._

Lips pressed to her forehead softly, soothing her tortured mind and blinding her to Tom's words. "Yes, it is right. Don't worry Ginny; I'll fix this soon," Harry said, kissing her cheek before standing and leaving the changing room. 

Ginny raised her head, touching her bruised lips lightly. 

_Yes, today will be fun for you, Virginia._

Merlin, what did he mean by that?

~*~

Well, _that_ was unexpected. 

Harry listened to Ron's usual pep talk without hearing a word, eyes drifting towards the petite girl standing on the other side of the small room. He could distantly hear the crowds buzzing louder than ever, but it had no effect on him. A smile curved his mouth, a smile no one had ever seen before. 

Ginny had kissed him. 

Ginny was still herself. 

There was hope after all. 

In all truth, he had had no idea she was going to react like that to him. He had just thought he would go in, talk to her, and let her mull on his words. It turned out better than he thought. Now, only if she would look at him...

Heart light, he followed the team out as they flew onto the pitch amid cries of support and excitement. The sun was shining; the wind was light; the air was warm. It was the perfect weather for Quidditch. And even though he was engulfed in a war, he felt nothing could go wrong today. 

Once he got into the air and the game began, all other thoughts left his mind except for the Snitch. The Hufflepuff Seeker, a young third-year, was surprisingly swift for his size, but his flying was nothing on Harry's. Harry soon figured out that this boy could be fooled, and used it to full advantage. After pulling a few feints, he could see his opponent getting tired. He grinned to himself; it was only a matter of time. 

The game continued; he spotted the Snitch a few times, but didn't pursue it. The Hufflepuff decided to leave him and search on his own, leaving Harry quite out in the open. It was clear that the Hufflepuff Chasers were the reason Hufflepuff had won their games; they had already scored five times on Ron, much to Ron's visible chagrin. But Katie, Dean, and Ginny were doing their jobs remarkably well; after a half-hour of play, the score was 100 to 60. 

A shiver passed through Harry, startling him. The wind hadn't picked up, and the sun was shining just as brightly; why had he had a chill?

It was in that moment that he saw a flash of gold dancing by Ginny's hair. Immediately, he sped towards her, garnering the attention of the other Seeker and the crowd. The other tried vainly to catch up, but Harry was too fast. At the last possible second before collision, Ginny ducked and shot towards the goal as Harry closed his fingers around the Snitch. 

"AND POTTER CATCHES THE SNITCH AS WEASLEY SCORES! THE GAME GOES TO GRYFFINDOR!"

Dennis' ecstatic voice rang through the crazy crowds as Harry lifted the Snitch in the air, a wide grin on his face. Katie grabbed him, sobbing into Dean's shoulder as Dean hugged her. Kirke and Sloper smashed into the group, and Harry clasped Ron as he flew over, tears pouring down his cheeks. 

"Yeah, Harry! We did it!" Ron cried as he clapped his Beaters on the back. 

The group floated to Earth amid the screams and cheers of the crowd. Harry searched for Ginny, pushing away from the crowds as Ron lifted the Cup in his shaking hands and was tackled by a bright-eyed Hermione. Holding the Snitch tightly in his hand, Harry finally got out of the crowds, another shiver running down his spine. He saw Ginny standing a little ways from him, face turned towards the Forbidden Forest. Starting towards her, he looked in the direction she was staring. 

And stopped dead in his tracks. 

Were... Were those _Dementors _coming out of the forest?

"Everyone get back!" Dumbledore's magically magnified voice exclaimed as a different sort of scream erupted from the crowds. There was a massive stampede towards the stands as the Dementors began to slip out of the shadowy trees one by one.  

Pulling out his wand and releasing the Snitch, Harry ran towards Ginny, who was frozen to her spot. "Ginny, move!" he yelled as a Dementor advanced on her, bony hands curling and grasping. "_Expecto Patronum_!"

Bursting from his outstretched wand, the ghostly stag cantered past Ginny to drive the Dementor back as Harry grabbed Ginny's wrist and pulled her up the slope of the lawn. She was shivering under his touch. "Ginny, think of something happy! You remember our Patronus lessons from last year, don't you?" he asked desperately as other Patronuses flew past, some more solid than others. He could see Hermione's otter from out of the corner of his eye. 

"It was a lot easier last year," she said faintly as Dumbledore reached the pair of them.  

"Harry, get Ginny inside," Dumbledore said quickly as Fawkes swooped down and landed on Ginny's shoulder, singing quietly. "It is not a good idea for her to be out here; it is very likely she is why this attack is occurring."

Ginny whimpered. Harry slipped an arm around her waist to support her and nodded at Dumbledore. With a wave of the headmaster's hand, Harry was running towards the castle, pulling Ginny along with him. His blood pounded in his veins, thundering in his ears; he had to get Ginny into the castle, he just had to...

"Don't take another step, Potter."

Looking up towards the castle doors, Harry's blood froze as he saw a group of Death Eaters waiting for him, Lucius Malfoy right in front. A delighted sneer crossed his pale face. "I'm thrilled; now we don't have to go through a lot of nonsense to get the Weasley brat," he said crisply, walking towards Harry and Ginny. 

Tightening his grip, Harry pulled Ginny back a few steps. "Don't even think about it, you bastard," he snarled as he felt Ginny reach for her wand. 

A high-pitched laugh attacked his ears, and he saw Bellatrix Lestrange follow Malfor down. "I see the famous Potter nobility complex is kicking in yet again! Maybe this time, Potter, you won't get someone else killed," she said mockingly. 

Hate engulfed him as Sirius' pale face flew to the front of his mind. Releasing Ginny, he made to go attack Bellatrix, a feral smile on his lips. God, he wanted to kill, feel the blood drain from her veins—--

An arm slung itself around his neck. "Don't you dare leave me, Harry Potter," Ginny whispered harshly as she pulled him back. 

With an amused smile, Lucius stepped closer. "I don't know what you see in him, my dear; my son is much more worthwhile, believe me." 

Ginny spat at his feet. "I'd kill myself before I'd ever touch your son," she snapped, wand out. 

Her fiery words brought Harry back from his rage, his blood-lust, and he redirected his wand towards Malfoy. "If you touch her, I will kill you," he said, strength radiating from him like a beacon. 

  
"I'll prepare my coffin, then, shall I?" Lucius said dryly, looking behind Harry's shoulder. "Ah. Just in time, Draco."

Harry whipped around as he heard Draco's loud Stunning Spell. Pain shot through him as Ginny screamed his name and he fell to the ground, descending into darkness. 

~*~

"Hello, Virginia."

Weakly, she lifted her head, opening her eyes at the sound of her name. It was dark and damp, wherever she was, deepening the ache that pervaded her whole body. Memories from her first year overwhelmed her, and she found herself chained to a cold stone floor. Fear flooded her veins; he had her again.

"I'm so happy to see you in my present form."

Looking up, she met a pair of slanted red eyes set in an impossibly pale face. Fright laced her every breath, and she struggled not to scream.

Tom.

He gazed down upon her impassively, a cruel smile on his face. "Aren't you pleased to be with me once again? I know you missed me."

Gathering any strength she had, she spat at his feet. "Don't fool yourself, Tom," she drawled out his former name like a curse. She'd be damned if he was going to get her again. 

Voldemort's eyes narrowed. Lifting his wand, he levitated her in the air, making her chains magically fade. "That isn't my name anymore. If you will address me, it will be Lord Voldemort," he sneered. 

She raised an eyebrow, quaking inside. "My mistake, Tom. I shall try not to forget."

With a snarl of anger, he sent her crashing against the wall. As her arm bent beneath her back and cracked audibly, she bit her lip until it bled. She wouldn't let him hear her scream because of him. 

Another wave of his wand, and her wrists and ankles were chained once more. Glancing at her arm, she thought she saw a sliver of bone piercing her skin, and her stomach heaved. Voldemort advanced upon her; she could see a couple of Death Eaters filtering in behind him, including both Malfoys, who had identical smirks upon their faces. She wanted to toss every curse in the book at all of them.

"You have become a very stubborn girl, Virginia. Why did you not stay the way you were? I liked you when you were docile," Voldemort said as a thin finger reached out to skim her cheek. She shuddered uncontrollably. A triumphant smile crossed his face. "Why don't you let me take care of you again?" 

"Why don't you let me leave?" she shot back, pulling her face from his touch. 

The smile grew forced. "Don't talk back to me. You know, I'm not very pleased with you right now."

She smirked with more bravery than she felt. "Forgive me if I don't mind."

Abruptly, he slapped her, his long nails cutting deeply down her cheek. It smarted and stung, but she bit her bleeding lip and said nothing. "I am inside you for a reason, you stupid girl! You are meant to be mine, and mine alone! I am the only one who can possess you," he growled, raising his wand to her heart. "It doesn't matter how much Harry Potter loves you, he will never be able to save you!"

"We'll see, won't we? He's defeated you before, he'll do it again! I'll die before you'll use me against anyone!" she exclaimed. 

Voldemort slapped her again, deepening the cuts on her already bleeding skin. "I'll do what I want, and not even Dumbledore will stop me! You have no power over yourself or me, Virginia. You're my puppet to do with as I will." Smiling maliciously, he stepped to the side. "And now I want to see my puppet dance. Draco!"

A gleeful Malfoy stepped forward, wand in hand. Ginny held her breath, pain lacing her arm and shoulder. Voldemort nodded towards her. "Entertain me, Draco."

Draco smiled. "As you wish." 

He stepped right up to Ginny, put his mouth near her ear. "You should have complied with me earlier, bitch. Now the real fun begins," he murmured, lips grazing her earlobe. She flinched in revulsion. Smiling in extreme pleasure, he put his wand to her heart. "Scream for me, Weasley. 

"_Crucio_!"

~*~

"_Ennervate_."

Harry shot up, breathing heavily. Above him, set on a crystal blue sky, were Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore, Lupin, McGonagall, and Snape. Lupin and Ron held out their hands, which Harry took, and helped him up. "What happened?" he asked quickly, rubbing his pounding scar. 

Dumbledore sighed. "Death Eaters came in through the Honeydukes passage as the Dementors attacked. They took Miss Weasley."

The bottom dropped from his stomach as he stared at the headmaster. "What? No one stopped them?" he asked thinly. 

"We were otherwise detained," Snape said curtly. "There were twenty Dementors to take care of."

"Who Stunned you, Harry?" Lupin asked quickly before Harry could snap an answer back to the Potions Master. 

"Draco Malfoy, youngest Death Eater of his time," Harry said bitterly, and continued. "What are we going---"

Exploding pain ripped through his forehead, sending him on the verge of collapse. His hands went to his scar as Ron and Hermione held him up. Intensifying with each passing second, he could hear screams, very familiar screams; Ginny's screams...

"What is it, Harry?" Dumbledore said urgently. 

His heart ripped to shreds as the screams continued and the pain threatened to overwhelm him. "They're hurting her. Oh god, they're hurting her," he muttered, anger and hate vying for first place in his mind. 

Dumbledore's mouth thinned. "We must get her back quickly. Severus, do you know where Voldemort is?" 

At Snape's nod, Harry lashed out. "Did you know about this?" he exclaimed, struggling against Ron and Hermione as they held him back. 

Snape drew himself up stiffly. "If I did, Potter, I would have said something. I am not Voldemort's personal confidant," he said coldly. 

Lupin intervened between them once more, face pale and haggard. "We have to get her back. Let's get a move on, Albus."

"Wait a minute! We're going too!" Ron exclaimed. "That's my sister!"

Harry grimaced against the blinding pain in his scar and stared at Dumbledore. "I have to go. We all have to go," he said firmly. 

Dumbledore looked the three of them over, then nodded. The three other professors burst into protest, but he silenced them with a hand. "They have the right, and it's not like they haven't seen battle before. They will go with us," he stated, turning back towards the castle. 

Everyone followed him, Harry bringing up the rear. His scar pounded with every movement, the screams echoing inside his mind. He would not let Ginny die, no matter what. Hell was waiting for Voldemort and all his Death Eaters if she was dead, and this time not even Dumbledore would be able to stop him. 

~*~

A/N: *ducks* Please don't hurt me! I never promised happiness! Please read and review. Many thanks and kudos to Anne, the Queen of Twisted Evilness. ^^


	12. Twelve

"When I think about it, Virginia, you actually did me a favor by breaking things off with Potter." 

Why did she have to listen to him? Was there something inside her that automatically responded to his words? A hand slipped behind her torn clothes, and she choked back a sob. 

"My, my. Draco, I believed she liked that." 

Slim fingers pawed at her skin, sharp nails biting and drawing warm blood. Shoved against the cold stone wall, she held back a moan of pain as the chains around her wrists chafed her skin.

Agony raced through every part of her body as her heart began to beat slower and slower with each shallow breath.

"Oh, yes. I had a point. Well, Virginia, now I know the extent of Potter's love for you. Sickening, really. It's not unlike what I had to see of his parents when I encountered them those few times. How many times, Lucius? Three, of course. Not counting their deaths, obviously. That hardly counts as an encounter; Potter's father hardly put up a fight at all, and all his stupid mother did was scream." 

She had to say something, anything! Tom couldn't get away with saying these things, making it seem as if the Potters were weak, and Harry loving her was her fault. How was she supposed to expect Harry to love her? One of Malfoy's hands brushed the curve of her breast, and she shuddered, struggling weakly to move away from his hands. 

A note of amusement came from the side. "Now, Draco, don't violate her. You may do as you wish with her once Potter is dead." Malfoy's touch left her completely at the order. 

"He won't die," she whispered, voice raspy from her torture. To her eternal shame, Draco had made her scream, and scream for a very long time. The state of her clothes came from when she had tried to rip herself from her bonds physically while being subjected to the Cruciatus Curse. Her face was bloodied and bruised; her arm was still broken, a large piece of the bone now protruding from her skin. 

Voldemort's red eyes bore into hers, despairingly confident and victorious. "I can assure you, my dear Virginia, that when Potter sees you in this condition, his rage will swallow up any sort of common sense he might have. His love for you will drive him to his ultimate destruction; how does that make you feel?" he asked silkily, wiping a bit of her blood off of her cheek. 

A smile crossed his face, and he turned to his Death Eaters. "Why, it will be like the Department of Mysteries! Someone he loves is in great danger and he will rush to their rescue! Except, of course, this time it's not fake," he said with a sneer. His followers laughed, Bellatrix Lestrange with a bloodthirsty look in her eyes. 

Squirming in her chains, Ginny pleaded desperately and silently to anyone for Harry to stay at Hogwarts, safe from Voldemort. If she didn't die before he got here, she knew she would if she had to see Harry die. 

Voldemort turned back to her. "You know what will make this even sweeter for you, Virginia?" he asked, holding a very familiar wand in his thin fingers. 

Her heart stopped for a second. 

"I'm going to kill him with your wand. It only makes sense, since ours don't work against each other's," he added, smiling as her eyes went wide with horror. 

Chin dropping to her chest, tears leaked from the corners of her eyes, making glistening trails through the slick blood. Only a few hours ago, she had been kissing Harry and thinking of the impossible; now she had nothing to sustain her. 

Chuckling lightly, Voldemort sighed mockingly. "Ah yes, that kiss; I thought I was foiled then. You see, Virginia," he whispered, leaning close to her ear, "there is a way to stop me other than killing me. And you almost found it." 

Unwillingly, she lifted her gaze, seeing the maniacal glee on his face. "And now you'll never know," he murmured, pointing her own wand at her. "Your whole life gone in one fateful encounter. Do you think you'll be saved now?" 

She felt nothing but the anticipation of more pain. Any idea of salvation for herself was far from her mind. All she could think about was Harry. 

_Please, stay away! I'm not worth dying for, Harry._

The cold high voice echoed through the room. She stiffened, bringing forth a thought of Harry to sustain herself. 

"_Crucio_!"   
  
  
  


~*~   
  
  
  


Grimacing, Harry raised his fist to his scar, pounding on his head to try to rid himself of the screams echoing through his mind. He had never heard Ginny scream like this, and he never wanted to hear it again in his life. This was a torture he had never experienced before; hearing someone you loved being killed second by second. When he heard Voldemort killing his parents when Dementors were near, it was only for a few seconds. This had been going on for hours. Was she strong enough to withstand an assault like this? Had she already been reduced to the state Neville's parents were in? He shuddered, hitting himself a bit harder.

A cold hand grasped his wrist. "Harry, stop hitting yourself. You have to stay alert," Hermione said softly, pulling Harry after the silent group trekking through the barren beaches of an island in the Orkneys. 

"Keep your mouth shut, Granger," Snape hissed at them, turning his head from the rocky terrain in front of them. "And don't bother holding Potter back; he'll find a way to get himself killed anyway." 

After spending the last three hours in the constant company of Snape, Harry's nerves were wearing quite thin, and he lashed out at the sneering Potions Master. "Why don't you bloody sod off, you bas-" 

Three hands clapped over his mouth: one was Ron's, one was Hermione, and the other was Tonks, who was bringing up the rear of the group. Harry glared mutinously at the three of them, earning return glares. 

Remus and Dumbledore shot Harry warning looks as Snape turned back around, back ramrod-straight, and led the group of Aurors and professors towards a castle perched on the edge of a rocky cliff. Arthur Weasley, whose eyes were slightly amused in spite of the situation, raised an eyebrow at Harry, face still pale from the shock of his daughter's taking. 

"Will you stop it, Harry? You're going to be bloody expelled," Ron muttered as they stumbled over large rocks and boulders jutting up from the sand. The ocean waves crashed violently against the shore, reminding Harry of his own feelings at this moment. He was going to tear Malfoy apart the minute he saw him. 

Tonks removed her hand from Harry's mouth, as did the others, and sighed, helping Hermione over a particularly rough patch. The wind whipped her dark-red hair around her strained face as they started a climb up to the path Snape was leading them to. "Harry, didn't I ever tell you not to attack in anger?" she asked quietly. 

Harry stayed obstinately silent; Hermione rolled her eyes, grabbing onto Ron's outstretched hand to steady herself. "Obviously not," she said shortly with a glance at Harry as he followed her over a boulder. 

"Then let's do this now. Harry," Tonks said, walking evenly with him. "If you attack out of pure anger, you're going to blind every other sense you have, and you'll ultimately fail. Right now, you're probably thinking about how much you'd like to rip out all the Death Eaters' throats, right?" 

When he didn't answer after a few seconds, she shrugged. "I'll take that as a yes. Well, Ginny is in there, probably hurting; if you lose your head, she's going to die. If you think about a goal, then you'll have focus. Anger makes you lose focus, not gain it," she said, following the others as they headed up a path to the decrepit castle. 

"Tonks, will you come here for a moment?" Remus asked quietly. 

Nodding, she gave Harry a quick pat before speeding up to catch up to Remus. Harry frowned, rubbing his scar again; the screams had stopped. It was a minor relief, but now he wondered why. Had they stopped torturing Ginny? Was she dead? 

The idea didn't even bear thinking about. 

After the attack at the school, Snape gave the location of Voldemort's hideout and as soon as a group of Aurors had arrived, everyone had set off, including Remus, Dumbledore, Harry, Ron, and Hermione. They had taken several Portkeys to this uncharted island in the Orkneys, and had spent the last hour walking from one side to the other in order to surprise Voldemort and his forces. Every minute lost was one less minute on Ginny's side, in Harry's opinion. He wanted to barge in, kill Malfoy and Voldemort, and save her before it was too late. 

A thread of pain passed through him, and he shuddered. What had they done to her by now? 

At the entrance to the small castle, Snape halted. "We should split up into two groups and go in two separate entrances. Voldemort will expect us through this entrance; there is another one I know of that he will not have guarded," he said briskly. 

Dumbledore nodded, and turned to the group. "I will take one group and Severus will take another to the alternate entrance. Please split into two groups." 

As the Aurors shuffled to either person, Dumbledore leaned to speak with Harry. "You, Ron, and Hermione go with Professor Snape. If you find Miss Weasley, get her out with this," he said quickly, handing Harry a rock. "It's a Portkey. Point your wand and say 'apple' to activate it." 

Slipping the rock in his pocket, Harry nodded and led Ron and Hermione over to Remus, who was standing with Snape and a few Aurors Harry didn't recognize. When Snape saw them, a slight sneer crossed his face, but he led them on nevertheless. Pushing his hatred of Snape from his mind, Harry concentrated on Ginny. God, where was she? 

* 

"Why, I do believe we have company, Virginia. Let's go meet them, shall we?" 

With a wave of his wand, Ginny was released from the wall and floated in the air in front of Voldemort. As he and his followers floated her out of the dungeons to the upper levels, she became aware of the sound of surf crashing against rocks, cold sea breeze creeping in through cracks in the stone walls. She was near the ocean. It didn't matter anymore. The last round of torture had ripped the spirit from her, casting it out of her heart to be stomped on. She didn't care about anything anymore; just as long as Harry didn't come... 

They entered a wide hall, not unlike the Great Hall in Hogwarts, and at the other side stood Professor Dumbledore, flanked by Tonks and Arthur Weasley and a few others. Voldemort stepped in front of her, blocking her from their view. She didn't think they had seen the condition she was in; it hurt too much to think about her father seeing her like this. Because of her father's silence, she guessed he hadn't, and that was a relief. 

"Dumbledore! I'm afraid you're a bit late; Virginia's already completely mine," Voldemort said darkly. She could imagine the smile on his face: evil, triumphant, menacing. She used to think that smile was innocent and clever; now she knew better. 

"You could never lie well, Tom. Where is Miss Weasley?" Dumbledore asked, voice strong as steel. 

_I'm here... Thank god Harry isn't!_

* 

As he approached the room, Harry found it harder and harder not to race out and curse everything in sight. The grip on his wand was becoming hard enough to break it; his knuckles were the whitest he had ever seen them. Ron gripped his shoulder briefly, face pale as a ghost. 

Snape led them straight to the entrance; they could hear Voldemort and Dumbledore conversing. As Remus took the head of the group, Snape slipped back. Harry noticed this, and his old anger filled him. "Where the hell do you think you're going?" he snapped as Snape passed. 

"Well, the Dark Lord can't know I led you here, can he? I have to go back to the school so my cover does not fall apart. Wrap your mind around that, Potter," he said coldly as he disappeared down the darkened corridor. 

Harry gritted his teeth painfully. "I hate that man," he muttered viciously. 

"Keep your head, Harry," Hermione whispered. 

Remus turned his head slightly. "We go out with Stunning Spells, all right? On my mark," he said softly. 

"And where is Potter? Why is he not here, saving the love of his life? You see now, Dumbledore, that love is not a strength; it is the weakest thing you can feel," Voldemort crowed. 

Moving out from the shadows, Remus motioned to the others and held out his wand, pointing at the nearest unsuspecting Death Eater. "_Stupefy_!" he shouted as the others joined in, catching some close Death Eaters by surprise. 

Voldemort whipped around as a few of his followers fell to the ground. His eyes landed on Harry, and a smirk curved his mouth. "Well, if it isn't Potter," he murmured as his followers began to throw curses at their adversaries. "I see you have arrived." 

"Where is she?" Harry asked hoarsely, raising his wand. All his hate and anger trained onto one person: Voldemort.

A cruel smile spread on Voldemort's face; Harry had a sickening feeling he was about to see something he wouldn't enjoy too much. "Do you really want her back, Potter? Is she worth it? Even if she's bloodied? Bruised? Violated?" he asked with a sneer, nostrils flaring. 

Rage boiled over in his veins, overwhelming him, horrifying a deep part of himself. Adjusting his grip on his wand, he steeled his gaze. "If she is, then it only means more trouble for you. Where is she?" he growled. 

Voldemort _laughed_. Draco Malfoy flicked his wand. 

A small, broken figure floated out from behind the battling Death Eaters; her red hair surrounded her face, matching the color of most of her body. Scratches and cuts ravaged her usually white skin, seen from the rips and tears in her clothes that hung from her body in shreds. A quick glance revealed a splintered arm hanging at her side, bone poking up through the skin. Head lolling to one side, her eyes flickered upward to abruptly meet Harry's outraged and appalled gaze. 

They were brown, dark chocolate brown, a brown he always wanted to get lost in; eyes that understood him, helped him, cared for him. It was her. The destroyed, crumpled girl floating in front of him was the proud, cheerful, loving Ginny he adored.

Inside him, a rage and anger he had never felt before rose up, blinding every thought except murder. He had never wanted to kill so badly; his whole being itched for blood, for vengeance. The entire world was silent except for this one need. It was like a bonfire, consuming him and everything around him. Thirsty for blood, he stepped towards Voldemort, wand outstretched.

"Harry, don't!" Remus yelled, but he took no heed. Everything else was in a different world; here, it was just him and Ginny, reaching out and taking her back from the hell she had been put through. 

Malfoy paled as Harry neared him and Voldemort. Harry smirked. "I am going to rip you apart, Malfoy," he said with a feral growl, aiming his wand. "_Stupefy!_"

Watching as Malfoy sunk to the floor, Harry stepped over him, wand now trained on Voldemort. Malfoy could wait. 

Voldemort scoffed, whipping out a wand from his robes. "Don't be ridiculous, Potter. How do you expect to defeat me, the most powerful wizard in the world?" 

"I'd love to see how your wand is going to work against mine, considering they're brothers," Harry snapped back. Distantly, he could hear Bellatrix Lestrange scream for mercy, and hoped she would get none. 

"Simple." Voldemort's malicious sneer widened. "I use someone else's wand."

As if hypnotized, Harry stared at the wand in his enemy's hand. It looked strangely familiar, like he had seen it in action before only a short time ago. Voldemort's gaze slid from him to Ginny and back, and a feeling of extreme disgust filled Harry. "You bastard," he spat.

"Oh, yes," Voldemort gloated, reaching out and tracing the area around Ginny's protruding bone with a thin finger. "I'm going to kill you with your girlfriend's wand! She was quite angry with me, I believe. But, a few rounds of the Cruciatus Curse cured that feistiness," he said. "She'll be of use to me again, for sure."

Knuckles white, Harry gritted his teeth. "Don't talk about her like that," he ground out. 

Voldemort raised an eyebrow. "Why? Because you love her?"

"Yes!" Harry exclaimed, grabbing the attention of his fighting companions and catching Voldemort by surprise. "I am not going to let you touch her again. If you do, I will kill you," he snarled. 

"You don't know how," Voldemort stated, looking a bit off-color.  

Now it was Harry's turn to scoff. "Like hell I don't! Why don't you come here and see?" he taunted, waving his wand slightly. 

Looking red in the face, Voldemort neared Harry, a dangerous glint in his eyes. "Don't provoke me, boy." 

"Let her go, then." Harry leveled his wand at Voldemort. 

Voldemort pointed Ginny's wand at Harry. "No, Potter. Your nobility is wearing thin on me. _Crucio_!"

Rolling to his side, Harry ducked the curse, hearing it crash into the wall. He raised his wand. "_Stupefy_!"

With a simple Shielding Charm, Voldemort deflected it back towards Harry, who was once again on his knees as he dodged it. His mind raced as he continued to duck and dodge Voldemort's attempts to curse him; why couldn't he remember any of the spells he had looked up with Dumbledore? He leapt into the shadows, watching and regaining his breath as Voldemort searched for him. 

"Come on out, Potter, or it'll be your girlfriend suffering the consequences!" he exclaimed, grabbing onto Ginny with a long hand. She shut her eyes as he dug the tip of her wand into her neck. "Will you let another loved one sacrifice themselves for you?"

Sirius' pale face came to Harry's mind as he watched Voldemort glide through the fray, Ginny struggling limply at his side. How could he do this? Ginny was going to die if he didn't think of something to do. Could he live with her death on his hands? Go through life with her blood on his soul? 

A cruel smile crossed Voldemort's face. "Your silence is your answer. Very well." He turned to Ginny. "You can be happy now, Virginia; your wish has come true. To save him, you're going to die."

"Ginny!" Ron called hoarsely, fighting his way towards her as Death Eaters threw curses at him. 

Harry shut his eyes. He had to choose: his life or Ginny's. 

There wasn't a choice.

"_Avada_--"

"Don't touch her," Harry said as he stepped out in front of Voldemort. "Give her to Dumbledore, and you can have me."

Opening her eyes, Ginny shook her head at Harry, tears brightening her gaze. "Harry, don't do this," she whispered. 

Voldemort flicked his wand, and she crumpled to the floor, a cry of agony piercing the din of battle as she landed on her injured arm. "Keep your mouth shut, girl!" he shouted.

He tried to smile at her, to reassure her; he didn't want her tears to be the last thing he saw of her before he died. "It's ok, Ginny," he said softly as he dropped his wand, eyes locked onto Voldemort. "I'm doing what I need to do."

"Harry, no!" Remus yelled as Hermione let out a shriek from across the room.

With a wicked smile, Voldemort leveled his wand at Harry's chest. "Just like your father, I see. Love is foolish. Say goodbye to Potter, Virginia; it's your fault he's here," he said.

Is this how James Potter had felt when he died trying to save his wife? Harry had to wonder as he faced Voldemort. The rage was gone; all he felt was a need to save Ginny. _Did I ever tell her I loved her? I hope she knows. Ginny, go find Ron. Save yourself._

"Don't do it, Tom."

The faint but steely command came from Ginny, who was watching them both with pain-filled eyes. Harry shook his head, but she ignored him, getting to her shaky legs with a struggle. Glaring at Voldemort, she held out her hand. "I won't let you use my wand to hurt him," she said quietly. 

"Don't try to be noble, girl! I told you to shut your mouth!" Voldemort exclaimed.

A small smirk curved Ginny's mouth, a sharp contrast to her bruised and bloodied face. "You forget, Tom: I don't have to listen to you anymore," she replied, causing Voldemort's eyes to widen. "_Accio_ wand!" 

Her wand flew from Voldemort's hand to hers. As Voldemort let out a yell of anger, Harry used his limited wandless magic and threw a Stunning Spell at him from behind. Managing to dodge it, Voldemort backed away from both of them, eyes narrow. "I'll get you, Potter, mark my words! And, I'll use your girlfriend to do it!" he exclaimed, pulling out his own wand and Disapparating with a sharp pop.

Immediately, the remaining Death Eaters circled Harry. Dodging their curses, Harry raced towards Ginny's buckling form, grabbing her around the waist and ducking into the shadows as flashes of light flew past him. As he adjusted his grip on her, he heard Ron's war-cry as the youngest Weasley boy attacked the Death Eaters with a vengeance, concentrating on the Malfoys mostly. 

"You shouldn't have come."

Ginny's hoarse words flew into his ears, and Harry looked at her beaten-up face, searching for any uninjured place. "Nothing was going to stop me," he replied softly, finding a place on her forehead to kiss gently. 

She shook her head, wincing painfully with the movement. "He could have killed you, and I'm not worth that," she whispered. 

Pulling her closer to him, Harry buried his face in her neck. "If he told you that, he was bloody wrong, Ginny," he said fiercely. "You're worth all that and more to me."

"Harry, what the hell are you still doing here? Use your Portkey!" Ron called, hexing Lucius Malfoy as he came near to the shadowed corner. 

Shifting his weight, Harry reached down and pulled the rock out of his pocket. Finding his wand, he pointed it at the rock. "Apple."

There was the telltale jerk from below his navel, and he and Ginny flew off in a burst of speed and wind, far away from the battle at hand.   

~*~

The sun was shining in the Hospital Wing three days later as Ginny looked outside the window by her bed, watching her classmates take a break from their classes. She had her textbooks in front of her, but she didn't have the heart to study; she hadn't had the heart to do much of anything since the battle in the Orkneys. 

When Madam Pomfrey was finally finished taking care of Ginny's most severe wounds, she had announced that it was a miracle the girl was still alive, let alone sane. The extensive damage to her body from the Cruciatus Curse had been enough to drive any normal wizard to insanity and even death; but Ginny was remarkably strong, and had managed to keep her health. The matron had a hard time of treating the splintered arm, and finally had to subdue Ginny with a Stunning Spell to keep her still enough to help the bone back together. It now rested in a sling by her side. 

Because of her injuries, Madam Pomfrey had ordered a week of bed-rest, which was a week too long, as Ginny had sourly complained to her family. The whole Weasley clan, excluding Percy, had come to Hogwarts to stay with Ginny for the first few days, but now it was only her parents and Ron left; Fred, George, Bill, and Charlie had to go off on business for the Order, to Ginny's displeasure. 

Ginny sighed, head throbbing slightly. Her brothers may have gone, but Harry had been at her side almost non-stop for the last three days. He had stayed by her during her treatment, letting her squeeze his hand until it was numb as she swallowed numerous vials of unidentifiable potions, each one more disgusting than the previous. During the day, when he wasn't in class, he sat with her without words, just holding her hand and sometimes kissing her forehead in farewell when Madam Pomfrey shooed him out before curfew. From what Hermione and Ron had told her, he wasn't going to meals, spending all his time either with her or in the library. 

Ron was surprisingly content with the situation at hand, only scolding Ginny for not telling him and Hermione about her problems. He said nothing of Harry, which led her to believe that he had accepted the fact that Harry loved her; a fact she herself was having a hard time dealing with.  

Tugging the shining ring from her finger, Ginny laid it in her palm and watched the mid-afternoon sun dance on the jewels, heart aching painfully. Voldemort's words had haunted her ever since she had been conscious enough to think about them, and she couldn't push them from her mind. 

_"I'll kill you yet, Potter! And I'll use your girlfriend, too!"_

Thinking about it, Ginny knew there wasn't anything she could do to stop Tom from entering her mind at any time. The only thing that seemed to stop him was Harry, and using him was out of the question, since that was what Tom wanted. It was a cycle of hopelessness that she was going around continuously; wanting Harry, helping Tom accidentally, harming Harry, still wanting him. The choice was made for her by circumstance; what was she waiting for? 

It was only that she wanted to bask in being near Harry for as long as she could before swinging the final stroke on their relationship. Who knew if she would ever be with him again in her life? In the time it would take to free her from Tom, he might move on, put his love for her aside and start over with someone new. The thought burned her, but she had to realize its truth; once she gave back this ring, there was no going back. Anything she and Harry would have had would be gone forever. 

Slipping the ring back onto her finger, Ginny settled back against her pillows and opened her Potions book. At least she would always have the memories of his touch on her skin, his voice in her ear. 

Could she survive on memories alone?

A stray tear slid down her pale cheek, which she didn't bother to wipe away. It landed with a soft plop on the page she was opened to, sinking into the paper and mudding the ink. 

She would have to survive; she didn't have a choice.

"Miss Weasley?"

The soft voice of the headmaster filled the room, and she looked up from her book with dry eyes. Smiling, Dumbledore stood a few steps away from her bed. She lifted the corners of her lips in a smile that didn't reach her eyes. "Hello, Headmaster."

Dumbledore Summoned a chair and came closer to her side, sitting down beside her. "How are you feeling?" he asked gently, concern twinkling in his bright eyes. 

"Every day I feel better," she said, soul burning under his steady gaze. 

He smiled slightly, leaning back in his chair. "I'm surprised Harry isn't here right now," he said casually. "From what I can tell, he's been spending all his free time with you."

Looking back down at her book, Ginny felt her cheeks flame. "Maybe it's better he's not here," she mumbled. 

There was a moment of silence; then she heard Dumbledore sigh. "Harry is someone who grew up without knowing what love was at all, Ginny," he began softly. "To see him at your side, offering all he can give you, and you pushing him away is something I may not be able to understand."

A sharp ache began in her heart. "I can make you understand, sir. Voldemort can use me! He's planning on it. I can't stay with Harry knowing I could be the one to kill him. Look how close he came to death a few days ago!" she exclaimed, looking up abruptly. 

The twinkle was gone from the headmaster's eyes, and only pity and heartache were left to gaze at her. Her stomach did a funny lurch down to the floor. "Ginny, there are ways of dealing with this sort of thing. I'm sure we'll be able to find something for you," he commented soothingly. 

Resolve filled her; she could not be comforted, could not be swayed. "You might not ever find anything, sir. Even if you did, it could be months. I can't let Tom have that opportunity to hurt anyone I care about," she said softly, glancing to the side of her bed. 

She heard a shift, and a hand rested on her shoulder, cool and calming on her fiery skin. "You must do what you think is best, Miss Weasley. But consider the circumstances you're in. Harry cares for you a great deal; it would hurt him horribly if you threw that back into his face," Dumbledore said quietly. 

Nodding, she didn't look up. With a wistful sigh, Dumbledore left her alone. Ginny gave a suspicious sniff as he left her, rubbing at her eyes before any tears could escape. 

_I know._

~*~

Coming back into the fold of students was difficult for Ginny, especially since the knowledge of her taking was widely known. She stuck close to Harry, Ron, and Hermione as May ended, using their skills to help her prepare for her O.W.L.S, which had finally arrived. The testing period drained her, and she always came to them with the fears of failing, which not even Hermione could soothe. 

The last day of testing was a Friday, and the next day was a special Hogsmeade weekend planned by Dumbledore to give his students a well-earned break. In a week they would all be back at their homes, so it was the last opportunity to visit the town before the end of term. Everyone cheerfully signed up for the trip except for Ginny, who pleaded off, saying she didn't feel well. Ron and Hermione offered to stay with her, but Harry had already volunteered, letting his friends go off alone for the first time in three weeks. He felt the privacy was the least he could offer, with both of them being so utterly supportive of him.

After Hermione and Ron took off hand-in-hand for the village, Harry set about finding Ginny. This proved to be more difficult than he had expected, but after asking a few people, and getting just as many knowing looks, he determined she was in her dormitory. 

Hmmm. The dormitory. He had gotten up there a few times, but hadn't tried his luck lately, since he hadn't had a reason to lately. His Confusion Charm was out of practice as well. 

Standing in the common room for a few minutes, he stared at the girls' stairwell, eyeing it like an unsolved mystery. Finally, inspiration struck him, and he grinned widely. Racing up to his

dormitory, he grabbed his Firebolt and left the tower, headed outside into the warm June air. 

After taking a quick glance around, he kicked off right below Gryffindor Tower, soaring upward until he was level with the windows. Flying around briefly, he saw a flash of red hair through one window, and halted beside it. With a quick identity check, he tapped on the window, smiling as Ginny came forward with a surprised look on her still-pale face. 

"Harry?" she asked incredulously as she opened the window. He noticed that she didn't smile as much as he thought she would.

He raised an eyebrow. "Going to let me in, or shall I float out here all day?" he asked teasingly. 

A slight smile curved her mouth, but it didn't travel to her eyes. "I haven't decided yet. I suppose I should, hmm?" 

Nodding, he watched as she silently moved from the window, giving him space to maneuver his broom inside her room. Once he had touched down on her floor, she moved past him to close the window. "Any reason you decided to fly up here?" she asked as he set his broom against her bed and looked at her. She was leaning against the windowsill, arms across her chest. The neckline of the shirt she was wearing was low enough for him to see the very beginning of a scar she carried over her heart; it was where Voldemort had held his wand as he had tortured her with Cruciatus, as she related it. Nothing Madam Pomfrey had done could rid Ginny of it; he briefly wondered how she felt with a scar of her own before coming back to the conversation at hand. 

"I thought you might want some company," he said as she came back to her bed, plopping down on its side. "Is there any reason you've locked yourself in your room?"

She didn't look at him as she answered, eyes fastened to the quilt on her bed. "I'm just packing. I want to be ready for Tuesday," she said. 

Sitting next to her, he gently slipped her hand into his, feeling the cool metal of his mother's ring against his skin. "Are you that anxious to leave Hogwarts?" he asked softly, wishing she would meet his eyes. 

A sigh rippled through her, a tired, weary sound he had never heard her make before. "I just want to be home." 

He squeezed her hand slightly, unsure of how to respond to that. A month of the Dursleys awaited him---the last time he would have to see them, considering he was going to be a legal adult in the wizarding world in July and the spell protecting him would wear off. It was the first time he realized this, and he spent a few minutes in his own silent reverie. After this short time, he could turn his back on them, never looking upon them again in his life. The thought gave him pleasure at the same time it shook him; as much as he hated the Dursleys, they were one of the only constants in his life. What kind of summer awaited him if even that was ending?

"Harry? Are you all right?" 

Ginny's voice brought him out of his thoughts, and he looked at her mutely. The look in her eyes was one of curiosity and sadness; he could tell she was wondering what was running through his mind. Taking a closer look at her face, it looked almost the same as before the attack, except paler. Her hair was always tied back now, something that drove him crazy every time he saw her; something about having his fingers loose in her hair tantalized him.

Considering his train of thought, he wondered if she would kill him if he kissed her right now. They hadn't kissed since that morning, before the Quidditch game, and he wasn't exactly sure where they stood in their relationship. But, he knew if he didn't kiss her now, he would regret it afterwards. 

Leaning towards her, he saw her eyes widen before they fluttered shut, and she closed the gap between their mouths, pressing against him gently as her free arm went around his neck. Hands still twined together at their sides, they moved closer together as he prodded her mouth open, sinking into her as quickly as he had ever. With a gentle hand, he reached up to the ribbon holding her hair and tugged, feeling the locks tumble down around her face as she made a husky sound in the back of her throat and curled closer into his body. Twisting his fingers into her hair, he felt like he was coming home, losing himself in her and forgetting all his problems. It was a feeling he never wanted to lose. 

Finally, their mouths separated with a soft sound; glazed eyes opened to meet their counterpart, a smile on his face. Her face was not quite as happy; he could see the beginnings of tears in her eyes, and panic flew through him. _Oh dear Merlin, what did I do? _

"Harry," she began weakly before burying her face in his shoulder, dry sobs heaving her shoulders. He wrapped his arms around her, finally releasing her hand from his. Bewilderment filled him; where did this go wrong? Just a moment ago everything had been more than fine, and now she was struggling to keep back her tears! 

"Ginny, what's wrong?" he whispered into her hair, rocking her slightly in an act of comfort. 

He felt her shake her head against him. "I can't do this to you, Harry! I just can't," she cried, voice muffled by his chest. 

Blood running cold, Harry pulled back to look her in the eye, trying to resist the urge to enfold the shaking girl back in his arms. "What do you mean?" he asked quietly. 

Slowly, she lifted her face to his, eyes bright. "He's still inside me, Harry; He will be until he dies, which might not be for years," she said softly. 

His arms fell away from her as he stared at her in complete shock. 

Well, there was no need to ask who "he" was. 

"I can't put you, or anyone else, in danger," she continued calmly before grasping his wrists. "I love you, Harry, I really do; I need to do this, for you and for myself. Please, please don't hate me."

Her voice dropped to a whispered plea. He gazed at her, heart beating slower than he thought was possible. She was doing this to him again and for the same reason; funny, he thought he would be angrier about this. 

But, he reasoned as her hands left his skin, what choice did she really have? There wasn't any known alternative to choose from; only Voldemort's death would completely end her suffering. Until that day, she could be a danger to everyone around her. It was a logical decision, one that he would make himself if put into her place. 

Then why did he want to fight for her like this? Why couldn't his heart listen to his mind and leave her be? 

He felt her press something small and round into the palm of his hand, and he looked down. It was the ring. 

"This belongs to you, Harry; save it for someone special," Ginny said thinly, scooting away from him. 

Glancing up, he saw a few silent tears running down her face, the despair she was feeling clear in her dark eyes. His heart swelled, and he shook his head slightly. He wasn't going to live without her a day more than what was necessary; he would find something to help her, or kill Voldemort over the summer with his bare hands. 

With a soft touch, he took one of her hands and opened it to lay flat. Placing the ring in her palm, he smiled slightly at her as he closed her hand. "I did save it, Ginny. It was a gift for you; keep it," he said softly. 

Her mouth opened in shock, jaw slack. Leaning towards her, he pressed a kiss to her mouth quickly before standing and grabbing his broom. "I am going to help you, even if I have to go to the end of the world to do it," he promised her quietly. Then he turned and left her room, closing the door softly behind him. 

~*~

"We're here."

Ron's quiet words brought Ginny back from her memories to the compartment on the Hogwarts Express, the same compartment she had shared with Ron, Hermione, and Harry on the way to Hogwarts last September. She glanced out the window and saw Platform 9 and ¾ come into view. The train began to slow as the shuffling of students could be heard through the corridors. Harry, Ron, and Hermione got to their feet and began to gather their things; she sat and waited for the train to halt, feeling slightly reluctant to get off the train. Her desire to go home was overpowered by the longing for Hogwarts for just for a moment. 

Harry bumped her accidentally, and his touch sent shivers through her. While their interactions since her Saturday confession weren't as icy as the ones after their break-up in March, Ginny still felt uncomfortable around Harry, like she was going to break her vow to herself and jump him at any time. The ring still graced her finger; she kept it on as a sign of hope to her and a reason to go on. He had promised her he wouldn't give up; she had to have faith in his words. 

A hand touched her shoulder. "Come on, Ginny. Everyone's waiting," Hermione said softly. Ginny roused herself, gathered her things, and followed her friend off the train. 

Her parents were the first ones she saw when she crossed the barrier, followed by Remus and Tonks, whose hands were suspiciously close to one another. Fred and George were there, grinning in a new set of dragonhide jackets that turned Ron purple in the face when he saw them. Also standing with the Weasleys were Hermione's smiling parents, Mr. Granger in a heated conversation with Mr. Weasley over wands as she approached. 

Hermione giggled and leaned over. "They're perfect friends, really; Dad's obsessed with anything wizard, and your father's obsessed with anything Muggle," she whispered, eliciting a laugh from Ginny as they set down their things and began the usual hugs and greetings. 

Watching Harry out of the corner of her eye, she smiled as he went straight to Remus after getting a hug and a handshake from Mrs. Weasley and Mr. Weasley respectively, embracing the man like a sort-of brother. Tonks winked at Ginny furtively before receiving a quick hug from Harry as well. Remus said something to Harry, and Harry looked farther off. Following his gaze, she saw the Dursleys standing as far away as they could possibly be from the happy group near the barrier, all looking very disagreeable. Mr. Weasley nodded to Remus, and soon the whole group was trooping over to the unhappy Muggles, Harry in the lead. 

"Mr. Durlsey, so good of you to be here," Remus said smoothly as Harry went to stand by them. "Just wanted to let you know that the same ruled apply for Harry's treatment as last summer. If we hear of anything out of the ordinary, we will pop by."

"By any means necessary," Fred piped up, causing Mr. Dursley's face to go red with fury. 

"Come on boy. Let's go," Dursley said shortly, turning away along with his wife and child. 

Harry made the rounds, giving Ron an awkward embrace and kissing Hermione on the cheek. Ginny stayed by her mother's side, avoiding a farewell; her cheeks burned as her mother raised an eyebrow at her. 

"We're leaving!" Dursley exclaimed from near the exit. 

Rolling his eyes, Harry picked up his trunk and Hedwig's cage and began towards the Dursleys. Ginny watched him walk away from her, heart heavy; why hadn't she said anything to him? 

As if he heard her thought, he stopped and turned, meeting her eyes. A small smile curved his lips, reaching his green eyes; eyes she adored. Those eyes were her undoing.

Shoving away her fears for one brief moment, she raced towards him, seeing the surprise on his face as she reached up and kissed his cheek quickly. Raising her left hand to her heart, she smiled. The ring sparkled in the sunlight of Kings Cross station, sending a spark of hope into her heart. 

Harry smiled at her widely, then turned back to the exit, head held high. As she watched him walk away, hope stayed within her heart. 

All she had was her hope.

~*~

Fin.

Author's Notes: Whee! We're done! It is officially done! My baby, my pride and joy; I'm happy to be able to start on the sequel. I can't leave it like this, can I? I might be stoned. ^^ Right now, I'd just like to thank everyone who reviewed, especially Lizzie, who just keeps me going, my reviewers at Checkmated!, my reviewers at SIYE, especially Clearwater_Penelope, Delylah, and Melindaeo, and my reviewers at FF.net, especially Rocky, The Keymaker, and MrIntel. Thanks to all of you! You definitely kept me going through everything. 

The first part of the sequel should be done by the end of February, I hope, so keep a look out. I'm not sure how long it'll be, but I don't think it will be as long as this one. 

Finally, a most gracious and heartfelt thanks to my wonderful beta Anne, who has done a lot for me since we've met, even if she doesn't realize it! ^^ I'm eternally grateful to her for taking me on and dealing with everything I've thrown at her. She's not only a great beta, she's a good friend. I don't know what I'd do without her. 

Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed! I hope you enjoyed this.  


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